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the diary of a man of fifty-第3部分
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as mine did。 Today he brought me a message from his Contessaa very
gracious little speech。 She remembered often to have heard her
mother speak of meshe called me her English friend。 All her
mother's friends were dear to her; and she begged I would do her the
honour to come and see her。 She is always at home of an evening。
Poor young Stanmer (he is of the Devonshire Stanmersa great
property) reported this speech verbatim; and of course it can't in
the least signify to him that a poor grizzled; battered soldier; old
enough to be his father; should come to call upon his inammorata。
But I remember how it used to matter to me when other men came;
that's a point of difference。 However; it's only because I'm so old。
At twenty…five I shouldn't have been afraid of myself at fifty…two。
Camerino was thirty…fourand then the others! She was always at
home in the evening; and they all used to come。 They were old
Florentine names。 But she used to let me stay after them all; she
thought an old English name as good。 What a transcendent coquette! 。
。 。 But basta cosi as she used to say。 I meant to go tonight to Casa
Salvi; but I couldn't bring myself to the point。 I don't know what
I'm afraid of; I used to be in a hurry enough to go there once。 I
suppose I am afraid of the very look of the placeof the old rooms;
the old walls。 I shall go tomorrow night。 I am afraid of the very
echoes。
10th。She has the most extraordinary resemblance to her mother。
When I went in I was tremendously startled; I stood starting at her。
I have just come home; it is past midnight; I have been all the
evening at Casa Salvi。 It is very warmmy window is openI can
look out on the river gliding past in the starlight。 So; of old;
when I came home; I used to stand and look out。 There are the same
cypresses on the opposite hills。
Poor young Stanmer was there; and three or four other admirers; they
all got up when I came in。 I think I had been talked about; and
there was some curiosity。 But why should I have been talked about?
They were all youngish mennone of them of my time。 She is a
wonderful likeness of her mother; I couldn't get over it。 Beautiful
like her mother; and yet with the same faults in her face; but with
her mother's perfect head and brow and sympathetic; almost pitying;
eyes。 Her face has just that peculiarity of her mother's; which; of
all human countenances that I have ever known; was the one that
passed most quickly and completely from the expression of gaiety to
that of repose。 Repose in her face always suggested sadness; and
while you were watching it with a kind of awe; and wondering of what
tragic secret it was the token; it kindled; on the instant; into a
radiant Italian smile。 The Countess Scarabelli's smiles tonight;
however; were almost uninterrupted。 She greeted medivinely; as her
mother used to do; and young Stanmer sat in the corner of the sofa
as I used to doand watched her while she talked。 She is thin and
very fair; and was dressed in light; vaporous black that completes
the resemblance。 The house; the rooms; are almost absolutely the
same; there may be changes of detail; but they don't modify the
general effect。 There are the same precious pictures on the walls of
the salonthe same great dusky fresco in the concave ceiling。 The
daughter is not rich; I suppose; any more than the mother。 The
furniture is worn and faded; and I was admitted by a solitary
servant; who carried a twinkling taper before me up the great dark
marble staircase。
〃I have often heard of you;〃 said the Countess; as I sat down near
her; 〃my mother often spoke of you。〃
〃Often?〃 I answered。 〃I am surprised at that。〃
〃Why are you surprised? Were you not good friends?〃
〃Yes; for a certain timevery good friends。 But I was sure she had
forgotten me。〃
〃She never forgot;〃 said the Countess; looking at me intently and
smiling。 〃She was not like that。〃
〃She was not like most other women in any way;〃 I declared。
〃Ah; she was charming;〃 cried the Countess; rattling open her fan。
〃I have always been very curious to see you。 I have received an
impression of you。〃
〃A good one; I hope。〃
She looked at me; laughing; and not answering this: it was just her
mother's trick。
〃'My Englishman;' she used to call you'il mio Inglese。'〃
〃I hope she spoke of me kindly;〃 I insisted。
The Countess; still laughing; gave a little shrug balancing her hand
to and fro。 〃So…so; I always supposed you had had a quarrel。 You
don't mind my being frank like thiseh?〃
〃I delight in it; it reminds me of your mother。〃
〃Every one tells me that。 But I am not clever like her。 You will
see for yourself。〃
〃That speech;〃 I said; 〃completes the resemblance。 She was always
pretending she was not clever; and in reality〃
〃In reality she was an angel; eh? To escape from dangerous
comparisons I will admit; then; that I am clever。 That will make a
difference。 But let us talk of you。 You are veryhow shall I say
it?very eccentric。〃
〃Is that what your mother told you?〃
〃To tell the truth; she spoke of you as a great original。 But aren't
all Englishmen eccentric? All except that one!〃 and the Countess
pointed to poor Stanmer; in his corner of the sofa。
〃Oh; I know just what he is;〃 I said。
〃He's as quiet as a lambhe's like all the world;〃 cried the
Countess。
〃Like all the worldyes。 He is in love with you。〃
She looked at me with sudden gravity。 〃I don't object to your saying
that for all the worldbut I do for him。〃
〃Well;〃 I went on; 〃he is peculiar in this: he is rather afraid of
you。〃
Instantly she began to smile; she turned her face toward Stanmer。 He
had seen that we were talking about him; he coloured and got upthen
came toward us。
〃I like men who are afraid of nothing;〃 said our hostess。
〃I know what you want;〃 I said to Stanmer。 〃You want to know what
the Signora Contessa says about you。〃
Stanmer looked straight into her face; very gravely。 〃I don't care a
straw what she says。〃
〃You are almost a match for the Signora Contessa;〃 I answered。 〃She
declares she doesn't care a pin's head what you think。〃
〃I recognise the Countess's style!〃 Stanmer exclaimed; turning away。
〃One would think;〃 said the Countess; 〃that you were trying to make a
quarrel between us。〃
I watched him move away to another part of the great saloon; he stood
in front of the Andrea del Sarto; looking up at it。 But he was not
seeing it; he was listening to what we might say。 I often stood
there in just that way。 〃He can't quarrel with you; any more than I
could have quarrelled with your mother。〃
〃Ah; but you did。 Something painful passed between you。〃
〃Yes; it was painful; but it was not a quarrel。 I went away one day
and never saw her again。 That was all。〃
The Countess looked at me gravely。 〃What do you call it when a man
does that?〃
〃It depends upon the case。〃
〃Sometimes;〃 said the Countess in French; 〃it's a lachete。〃
〃Yes; and sometimes it's an act of wisdom。〃
〃And sometimes;〃 rejoined the Countess; 〃it's a mistake。〃
I shook my head。 〃For me it was no mistake。〃
She began to laugh again。 〃Caro Signore; you're a great original。
What had my poor mother done to you?〃
I looked at our young Englishman; who still had his back turned to us
and was staring up at the picture。 〃I will tell you some other
time;〃 I said。
〃I shall certainly remind you; I am very curious to know。〃 Then she
opened and shut her fan two or three times; still looking at me。
What eyes they have! 〃Tell me a little;〃 she went on; 〃if I may ask
without indiscretion。 Are you married?〃
〃No; Signora Contessa。〃
〃Isn't that at least a mistake?〃
〃Do I look very unhappy?〃
She dropped her head a little to one side。 〃For an Englishmanno!〃
〃Ah;〃 said I; laughing; 〃you are quite as clever as your mother。〃
〃And they tell me that you are a great soldier;〃 she continued; 〃you
have lived in India。 It was very kind of you; so far away; to have
remembered our poor dear Italy。〃
〃One always remembers Italy; the distance makes no difference。 I
remembered it well the day I heard of your mother's death!〃
〃Ah; that was a sorrow!〃 said the Countess。 〃There's not a day that
I don't weep for her。 But che vuole? She's a saint its paradise。〃
〃Sicuro;〃 I answered; and I looked some time at the ground。 〃But
tell me about yourself; dear lady;〃 I asked at last; raising my eyes。
〃You have also had the sorrow of losing your husband。〃
〃I am a poor widow; as you see。 Che vuole? My husband died after
three years of marriage。〃
I waited for her to remark that the late Count Scarabelli was also a
saint in paradise; but I waited in vain。
〃That was like your distinguished father;〃 I said。
〃Yes; he too died young。 I can't be said to have known him; I was
but of the age of my own little girl。 But I weep for him all the
more。〃
Again I was silent for a moment。
〃It was in India too;〃 I said presently; 〃that I heard of your
mother's second marriage。〃
The Countess raised her eyebrows。
〃In India; then; one hears of everything! Did that news please you?〃
〃Well; since you ask meno。〃
〃I understand that;〃 said the Countess; looking at her open fan。 〃I
shall not marry again like that。〃
〃That's what your mother said to me;〃 I ventured to observe。
She was not offended; but she rose from her seat and stood looking at
me a moment。 Then〃You should not have gone away!〃 she exclaimed。
I stayed for another hour; it is a very pleasant house。
Two or three of the men who were sitting there seemed very civil and
intelligent; one of the
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