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where　you　are！〃



〃See　heresee　here！〃　he　nevertheless　pleaded。



〃I　won't　give　you　up！〃　she　cried　once　morethis　time　quite　with

passion；　on　which　she　got　away　from　him　as　fast　as　she　could　and

left　him　staring　after　her。







CHAPTER　XVIII







Mr。　Mudge　had　lately　been　so　occupied　with　their　famous　〃plans〃

that　he　had　neglected　for　a　while　the　question　of　her　transfer；　but

down　at　Bournemouth；　which　had　found　itself　selected　as　the　field

of　their　recreation　by　a　process　consisting；　it　seemed；　exclusively

of　innumerable　pages　of　the　neatest　arithmetic　in　a　very　greasy　but

most　orderly　little　pocket…book；　the　distracting　possible　melted

awaythe　fleeting　absolute　ruled　the　scene。　　The　plans；　hour　by

hour；　were　simply　superseded；　and　it　was　much　of　a　rest　to　the

girl；　as　she　sat　on　the　pier　and　overlooked　the　sea　and　the

company；　to　see　them　evaporate　in　rosy　fumes　and　to　feel　that　from

moment　to　moment　there　was　less　left　to　cipher　about。　　The　week

proves　blissfully　fine；　and　her　mother；　at　their　lodgingspartly

to　her　embarrassment　and　partly　to　her　reliefstruck　up　with　the

landlady　an　alliance　that　left　the　younger　couple　a　great　deal　of

freedom。　　This　relative　took　her　pleasure　of　a　week　at　Bournemouth

in　a　stuffy　back…kitchen　and　endless　talks；　to　that　degree　even

that　Mr。　Mudge　himselfhabitually　inclined　indeed　to　a　scrutiny　of

all　mysteries　and　to　seeing；　as　he　sometimes　admitted；　too　much　in

thingsmade　remarks　on　it　as　he　sat　on　the　cliff　with　his

betrothed；　or　on　the　decks　of　steamers　that　conveyed　them；　close…

packed　items　in　terrific　totals　of　enjoyment；　to　the　Isle　of　Wight

and　the　Dorset　coast。



He　had　a　lodging　in　another　house；　where　he　had　speedily　learned

the　importance　of　keeping　his　eyes　open；　and　he　made　no　secret　of

his　suspecting　that　sinister　mutual　connivances　might　spring；　under

the　roof　of　his　companions；　from　unnatural　sociabilities。　　At　the

same　time　he　fully　recognised　that　as　a　source　of　anxiety；　not　to

say　of　expense；　his　future　mother…in　law　would　have　weighted　them

more　by　accompanying　their　steps　than　by　giving　her　hostess；　in　the

interest　of　the　tendency　they　considered　that　they　never　mentioned；

equivalent　pledges　as　to　the　tea…caddy　and　the　jam…pot。　　These　were

the　questionsthese　indeed　the　familiar　commoditiesthat　he　had

now　to　put　into　the　scales；　and　his　betrothed　had　in　consequence；

during　her　holiday；　the　odd　and　yet　pleasant　and　almost　languid

sense　of　an　anticlimax。　　She　had　become　conscious　of　an

extraordinary　collapse；　a　surrender　to　stillness　and　to　retrospect。

She　cared　neither　to　walk　nor　to　sail；　it　was　enough　for　her　to　sit

on　benches　and　wonder　at　the　sea　and　taste　the　air　and　not　be　at

Cocker's　and　not　see　the　counter…clerk。　　She　still　seemed　to　wait

for　somethingsomething　in　the　key　of　the　immense　discussions　that

had　mapped　out　their　little　week　of　idleness　on　the　scale　of　a

world…atlas。　　Something　came　at　last；　but　without　perhaps　appearing

quite　adequately　to　crown　the　monument。



Preparation　and　precaution　were；　however；　the　natural　flowers　of

Mr。　Mudge's　mind；　and　in　proportion　as　these　things　declined　in　one

quarter　they　inevitably　bloomed　elsewhere。　　He　could　always；　at　the

worst；　have　on　Tuesday　the　project　of　their　taking　the　Swanage　boat

on　Thursday；　and　on　Thursday　that　of　their　ordering　minced　kidneys

on　Saturday。　　He　had　moreover　a　constant　gift　of　inexorable　enquiry

as　to　where　and　what　they　should　have　gone　and　have　done　if　they

hadn't　been　exactly　as　they　were。　　He　had　in　short　his　resources；

and　his　mistress　had　never　been　so　conscious　of　them；　on　the　other

hand　they　never　interfered　so　little　with　her　own。　　She　liked　to　be

as　she　wasif　it　could　only　have　lasted。　　She　could　accept　even

without　bitterness　a　rigour　of　economy　so　great　that　the　little　fee

they　paid　for　admission　to　the　pier　had　to　be　balanced　against

other　delights。　　The　people　at　Ladle's　and　at　Thrupp's　had　THEIR

ways　of　amusing　themselves；　whereas　she　had　to　sit　and　hear　Mr。

Mudge　talk　of　what　he　might　do　if　he　didn't　take　a　bath；　or　of　the

bath　he　might　take　if　he　only　hadn't　taken　something　else。　　He　was

always　with　her　now；　of　course；　always　beside　her；　she　saw　him　more

than　〃hourly；〃　more　than　ever　yet；　more　even　than　he　had　planned

she　should　do　at　Chalk　Farm。　　She　preferred　to　sit　at　the　far　end；

away　from　the　band　and　the　crowd；　as　to　which　she　had　frequent

differences　with　her　friend；　who　reminded　her　often　that　they　could

have　only　in　the　thick　of　it　the　sense　of　the　money　they　were

getting　back。　　That　had　little　effect　on　her；　for　she　got　back　her

money　by　seeing　many　things；　the　things　of　the　past　year；　fall

together　and　connect　themselves；　undergo　the　happy　relegation　that

transforms　melancholy　and　misery；　passion　and　effort；　into

experience　and　knowledge。



She　liked　having　done　with　them；　as　she　assured　herself　she　had

practically　done；　and　the　strange　thing　was　that　she　neither　missed

the　procession　now　nor　wished　to　keep　her　place　for　it。　　It　had

become　there；　in　the　sun　and　the　breeze　and　the　sea…smell；　a　far…

away　story；　a　picture　of　another　life。　　If　Mr。　Mudge　himself　liked

processions；　liked　them　at　Bournemouth　and　on　the　pier　quite　as

much　as　at　Chalk　Farm　or　anywhere；　she　learned　after　a　little　not

to　be　worried　by　his　perpetual　counting　of　the　figures　that　made

them　up。　　There　were　dreadful　women　in　particular；　usually　fat　and

in　men's　caps　and　write　shoes；　whom　he　could　never　let　alonenot

that　she　cared；　it　was　not　the　great　world；　the　world　of　Cocker's

and　Ladle's　and　Thrupp's；　but　it　offered　an　endless　field　to　his

faculties　of　memory；　philosophy；　and　frolic。　　She　had　never

accepted　him　so　much；　never　arranged　so　successfully　for　making　him

chatter　while　she　carried　on　secret　conversations。　　This　separate

commerce　was　with　herself；　and　if　they　both　practised　a　great

thrift　she　had　quite　mastered　that　of　merely　spending　words　enough

to　keep　him　imperturbably　and　continuously　going。



He　was　charmed　with　the　panorama；　not　knowingor　at　any　rate　not

at　all　showing　that　he　knewwhat　far　other　images　peopled　her　mind

than　the　women　in　the　navy　caps　and　the　shop…boys　in　the　blazers。

His　observations　on　these　types；　his　general　interpretation　of　the

show；　brought　home　to　her　the　prospect　of　Chalk　Farm。　　She　wondered

sometimes　that　he　should　have　derived　so　little　illumination；

during　his　period；　from　the　society　at　Cocker's。　　But　one　evening

while　their　holiday　cloudlessly　waned　he　gave　her　such　a　proof　of

his　quality　as　might　have　made　her　ashamed　of　her　many

suppressions。　　He　brought　out　something　that；　in　all　his　overflow；

he　had　been　able　to　keep　back　till　other　matters　were　disposed　of。

It　was　the　announcement　that　he　was　at　last　ready　to　marrythat　he

saw　his　way。　　A　rise　at　Chalk　Farm　had　been　offered　him；　he　was　to

be　taken　into　the　business；　bringing　with　him　a　capital　the

estimation　of　which　by　other　parties　constituted　the　handsomest

recognition　yet　made　of　the　head　on　his　shoulders。　　Therefore　their

waiting　was　overit　could　be　a　question　of　a　near　date。　　They

would　settle　this　date　before　going　back；　and　he　meanwhile　had　his

eye　on　a　sweet　little　home。　　He　would　take　her　to　see　it　on　their

first　Sunday。







CHAPTER　XIX







His　having　kept　this　great　news　for　the　last；　having　had　such　a

card　up　his　sleeve　and　not　floated　it　out　in　the　current　of　his

chatter　and　the　luxury　of　their　leisure；　was　one　of　those

incalculable　strokes　by　which　he　could　still　affect　her；　the　kind

of　thing　that　reminded　her　of　the　latent　force　that　had　ejected　the

drunken　soldieran　example　of　the　profundity　of　which　his

promotion　was　the　proof。　　She　listened　a　while　in　silence；　on　this

occasion；　to　the　wafted　strains　of　the　music；　she　took　it　in　as　she

had　not　quite　done　before　that　her　future　was　now　constituted。　　Mr。

Mudge　was　distinctly　her　fate；　yet　at　this　moment　she　turned　her

face　quite　away　from　him；　showing　him　so　long　a　mere　quarter　of　her

cheek　that　she　at　last　again　heard　his　voice。　　He　couldn't　see　a

pair　of　tears　that　were　partly　the　reason　of　her　delay　to　give　him

the　assurance　he　required；　but　he　expressed　at　a　venture　the　hope

that　she　had　had　her　fill　of　Cocker's。



She　was　finally　able　to　turn　back。　　〃Oh　quite。　　There's　nothing

going　on。　　No　one　comes　but　the　Americans　at　Thrupp's；　and　they

don't　do　much。　　They　don't　seem　to　have　a　secret　in　the　world。〃



〃Then　the　extraordinary　reason　you've　been　giving　me　for　holding　on

there　has　ceased　to　work？〃



She　thought　a　moment。　　〃Yes；　that　one。　　I've　seen　the　thing

throughI've　got　them　all　in　my　pocket。〃



〃So　you're　ready　to　come？〃



For　a　little　again　she　made　no　answer。　　〃No；　not　yet；　all　the　same。

I've　still　got　a　reasona　different　one。〃



He　looked　her　all　over　as　if　it　might　have　been　something　she　kept

in　her　mouth　or　her　glove　or　under　her　jacketsomething　she　was

even　sitting　upon。　　〃Well；　I'll　have　it；　please。〃



〃I　went　out　the　other　night　and　sat　in　the　Park　with　a　gentleman；〃

she　said　at　last。



Nothing　was　ever　seen　like　his　confidence　in　her　and　she　wondered　a

little　now　why　it　didn't　irritate　her。　　It　only　gave　her　ease　and

space；　as　she　felt；　for　telling　him　the　whole　truth　that　no　one

knew。　　It　had　arrived　at　present　at　her　really　wanting　to　do　that；

and　yet　to　do　it　not　in　the　least　for　Mr。　Mudge；　but　altogether　and

only　for　herself。　　This　truth　filled　out　for　her　there　the　whole

experience　about　to　relinquish；　suffused　and　coloured　it　as　a

picture　that　she　should　keep　and　that；　describe　it　as　she　might；　no

one　but　herself　would　ever　really　see。　　Moreover　she　had　no　desire

whatever　to　make　Mr。　Mudge　jealous；　there　would　be　no　amusement　in

it；　for　the　amusement　she　had　lately　known　had　spoiled　her　for

lower　pleasures。　　There　were　even　no　materials　for　it。　　The　odd

thing　was　how　she　never　doubted　that；　prope