in the cage-第15部分

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of　was　probably；　to　her　strained　inner　sense；　the　group　of　golden

ones；　of　any　occasion　for　seeing　the　hazy　sunshine　slant　at　that

angle　into　the　smelly　shop；　of　any　range　of　chances　for　his　wishing

still　to　repeat　to　her　the　two　words　she　had　in　the　Park　scarcely

let　him　bring　out。　　〃See　heresee　here！〃the　sound　of　these　two

words　had　been　with　her　perpetually；　but　it　was　in　her　ears　to…day

without　mercy；　with　a　loudness　that　grew　and　grew。　　What　was　it

they　then　expressed？　what　was　it　he　had　wanted　her　to　see？　　She

seemed；　whatever　it　was；　perfectly　to　see　it　nowto　see　that　if

she　should　just　chuck　the　whole　thing；　should　have　a　great　and

beautiful　courage；　he　would　somehow　make　everything　up　to　her。

When　the　clock　struck　five　she　was　on　the　very　point　of　saying　to

Mr。　Buckton　that　she　was　deadly　ill　and　rapidly　getting　worse。

This　announcement　was　on　her　lips；　and　she　had　quite　composed　the

pale　hard　face　she　would　offer　him：　　〃I　can't　stopI　must　go　home。

If　I　feel　better；　later　on；　I'll　come　back。　　I'm　very　sorry；　but　I

MUST　go。〃　　At　that　instant　Captain　Everard　once　more　stood　there；

producing　in　her　agitated　spirit；　by　his　real　presence；　the

strangest；　quickest　revolution。　　He　stopped　her　off　without　knowing

it；　and　by　the　time　he　had　been　a　minute　in　the　shop　she　felt

herself　saved。



That　was　from　the　first　minute　how　she　thought　of　it。　　There　were

again　other　persons　with　whom　she　was　occupied；　and　again　the

situation　could　only　be　expressed　by　their　silence。　　It　was

expressed；　of　a　truth；　in　a　larger　phrase　than　ever　yet；　for　her

eyes　now　spoke　to　him　with　a　kind　of　supplication。　　〃Be　quiet；　be

quiet！〃　they　pleaded；　and　they　saw　his　own　reply：　　〃I'll　do

whatever　you　say；　I　won't　even　look　at　yousee；　see！〃　　They　kept

conveying　thus；　with　the　friendliest　liberality；　that　they　wouldn't

look；　quite　positively　wouldn't。　　What　she　was　to　see　was　that　he

hovered　at　the　other　end　of　the　counter；　Mr。　Buckton's　end；　and

surrendered　himself　again　to　that　frustration。　　It　quickly　proved

so　great　indeed　that　what　she　was　to　see　further　was　how　he　turned

away　before　he　was　attended　to；　and　hung　off；　waiting；　smoking；

looking　about　the　shop；　how　he　went　over　to　Mr。　Cocker's　own

counter　and　appeared　to　price　things；　gave　in　fact　presently　two　or

three　orders　and　put　down　money；　stood　there　a　long　time　with　his

back　to　her；　considerately　abstaining　from　any　glance　round　to　see

if　she　were　free。　　It　at　last　came　to　pass　in　this　way　that　he　had

remained　in　the　shop　longer　than　she　had　ever　yet　known　to　do；　and

that；　nevertheless；　when　he　did　turn　about　she　could　see　him　time

himselfshe　was　freshly　taken　upand　cross　straight　to　her　postal

subordinate；　whom　some　one　else　had　released。　　He　had　in　his　hand

all　this　while　neither　letters　nor　telegrams；　and　now　that　he　was

close　to　herfor　she　was　close　to　the　counter…clerkit　brought

her　heart　into　her　mouth　merely　to　see　him　look　at　her　neighbour

and　open　his　lips。　　She　was　too　nervous　to　bear　it。　　He　asked　for　a

Post…Office　Guide；　and　the　young　man　whipped　out　a　new　one；

whereupon　he　said　he　wished　not　to　purchase；　but　only　to　consult

one　a　moment；　with　which；　the　copy　kept　on　loan　being　produced；　he

once　more　wandered　off。



What　was　he　doing　to　her？　　What　did　he　want　of　her？　　Well；　it　was

just　the　aggravation　of　his　〃See　here！〃　　She　felt　at　this　moment

strangely　and　portentously　afraid　of　himhad　in　her　ears　the　hum

of　a　sense　that；　should　it　come　to　that　kind　of　tension；　she　must

fly　on　the　spot　to　Chalk　Farm。　　Mixed　with　her　dread　and　with　her

reflexion　was　the　idea　that；　if　he　wanted　her　so　much　as　he　seemed

to　show；　it　might　be　after　all　simply　to　do　for　him　the　〃anything〃

she　had　promised；　the　〃everything〃　she　had　thought　it　so　fine　to

bring　out　to　Mr。　Mudge。　　He　might　want　her　to　help　him；　might　have

some　particular　appeal；　though　indeed　his　manner　didn't　denote

thatdenoted　on　the　contrary　an　embarrassment；　an　indecision；

something　of　a　desire　not　so　much　to　be　helped　as　to　be　treated

rather　more　nicely　than　she　had　treated　him　the　other　time。　　Yes；

he　considered　quite　probably　that　he　had　help　rather　to　offer　than

to　ask　for。　　Still；　none　the　less；　when　he　again　saw　her　free　he

continued　to　keep　away　from　her；　when　he　came　back　with　his　thumbed

Guide　it　was　Mr。　Buckton　he　caughtit　was　from　Mr。　Buckton　he

obtained　half…a…crown's…worth　of　stamps。



After　asking　for　the　stamps　he　asked；　quite　as　a　second　thought；

for　a　postal…order　for　ten　shillings。　　What　did　he　want　with　so

many　stamps　when　he　wrote　so　few　letters？　　How　could　he　enclose　a

postal…order　in　a　telegram？　　She　expected　him；　the　next　thing；　to

go　into　the　corner　and　make　up　one　of　his　telegramshalf　a　dozen

of　themon　purpose　to　prolong　his　presence。　　She　had　so　completely

stopped　looking　at　him　that　she　could　only　guess　his　movements

guess　even　where　his　eyes　rested。　　Finally　she　saw　him　make　a　dash

that　might　have　been　toward　the　nook　where　the　forms　were　hung；　and

at　this　she　suddenly　felt　that　she　couldn't　keep　it　up。　　The

counter…clerk　had　just　taken　a　telegram　from　a　slavey；　and；　to　give

herself　something　to　cover　her；　she　snatched　it　out　of　his　hand。

The　gesture　was　so　violent　that　he　gave　her　in　return　an　odd　look；

and　she　also　perceived　that　Mr。　Buckton　noticed　it。　　The　latter

personage；　with　a　quick　stare　at　her；　appeared　for　an　instant　to

wonder　whether　his　snatching　it　in　HIS　turn　mightn't　be　the　thing

she　would　least　like；　and　she　anticipated　this　practical　criticism

by　the　frankest　glare　she　had　ever　given　him。　　It　sufficed：　　this

time　it　paralysed　him；　and　she　sought　with　her　trophy　the　refuge　of

the　sounder。







CHAPTER　XXI







It　was　repeated　the　next　day；　it　went　on　for　three　days；　and　at　the

end　of　that　time　she　knew　what　to　think。　　When；　at　the　beginning；

she　had　emerged　from　her　temporary　shelter　Captain　Everard　had

quitted　the　shop；　and　he　had　not　come　again　that　evening；　as　it　had

struck　her　he　possibly　mightmight　all　the　more　easily　that　there

were　numberless　persons　who　came；　morning　and　afternoon；　numberless

times；　so　that　he　wouldn't　necessarily　have　attracted　attention。

The　second　day　it　was　different　and　yet　on　the　whole　worse。　　His

access　to　her　had　become　possibleshe　felt　herself　even　reaping

the　fruit　of　her　yesterday's　glare　at　Mr。　Buckton；　but　transacting

his　business　with　him　didn't　simplifyit　could；　in　spite　of　the

rigour　of　circumstance；　feed　so　her　new　conviction。　　The　rigour　was

tremendous；　and　his　telegramsnot　now　mere　pretexts　for　getting　at

herwere　apparently　genuine；　yet　the　conviction　had　taken　but　a

night　to　develop。　　It　could　be　simply　enough　expressed；　she　had　had

the　glimmer　of　it　the　day　before　in　her　idea　that　he　needed　no　more

help　than　she　had　already　given；　that　it　was　help　he　himself　was

prepared　to　render。　　He　had　come　up　to　town　but　for　three　or　four

days；　he　had　been　absolutely　obliged　to　be　absent　after　the　other

time；　yet　he　would；　now　that　he　was　face　to　face　with　her；　stay　on

as　much　longer　as　she　liked。　　Little　by　little　it　was　thus

clarified；　though　from　the　first　flash　of　his　re…appearance　she　had

read　into　it　the　real　essence。



That　was　what　the　night　before；　at　eight　o'clock；　her　hour　to　go；

had　made　her　hang　back　and　dawdle。　　She　did　last　things　or

pretended　to　do　them；　to　be　in　the　cage　had　suddenly　become　her

safety；　and　she　was　literally　afraid　of　the　alternate　self　who

might　be　waiting　outside。　　HE　might　be　waiting；　it　was　he　who　was

her　alternate　self；　and　of　him　she　was　afraid。　　The　most

extraordinary　change　had　taken　place　in　her　from　the　moment　of　her

catching　the　impression　he　seemed　to　have　returned　on　purpose　to

give　her。　　Just　before　she　had　done　so；　on　that　bewitched

afternoon；　she　had　seen　herself　approach　without　a　scruple　the

porter　at　Park　Chambers；　then　as　the　effect　of　the　rush　of　a

consciousness　quite　altered　she　had　on　at　last　quitting　Cocker's；

gone　straight　home　for　the　first　time　since　her　return　from

Bournemouth。　　She　had　passed　his　door　every　night　for　weeks；　but

nothing　would　have　induced　her　to　pass　it　now。　　This　change　was　the

tribute　of　her　fearthe　result　of　a　change　in　himself　as　to　which

she　needed　no　more　explanation　than　his　mere　face　vividly　gave　her；

strange　though　it　was　to　find　an　element　of　deterrence　in　the

object　that　she　regarded　as　the　most　beautiful　in　the　world。　　He

had　taken　it　from　her　in　the　Park　that　night　that　she　wanted　him

not　to　propose　to　her　to　sup；　but　he　had　put　away　the　lesson　by

this　timehe　practically　proposed　supper　every　time　he　looked　at

her。　　This　was　what；　for　that　matter；　mainly　filled　the　three　days。

He　came　in　twice　on　each　of　these；　and　it　was　as　if　he　came　in　to

give　her　a　chance　to　relent。　　That　was　after　all；　she　said　to

herself　in　the　intervals；　the　most　that　he　did。　　There　were　ways；

she　fully　recognised；　in　which　he　spared　her；　and　other　particular

ways　as　to　which　she　meant　that　her　silence　should　be　full　to　him

of　exquisite　pleading。　　The　most　particular　of　all　was　his　not

being　outside；　at　the　corner；　when　she　quitted　the　place　for　the

night。　　This　he　might　so　easily　have　beenso　easily　if　he　hadn't

been　so　nice。　　She　continued　to　recognise　in　his　forbearance　the

fruit　of　her　dumb　supplication；　and　the　only　compensation　he　found

for　it　was　the　harmless　freedom　of　being　able　to　appear　to　say：

〃Yes；　I'm　in　town　only　for　three　or　four　days；　but；　you　know；　I

WOULD　stay　on。〃　　He　struck　her　as　calling　attention　each　day；　each

hour；　to　the　rapid　ebb　of　time；　he　exaggerated　to　the　point　of

putting　it　that　there　were　only　two　days　more；　that　there　was　at

last；　dreadfully；　only　one。



There　were　other　things　still　that　he　struck　her　as　doing　with　a

special　intention；　as　to　the　most　marked　of　whichunless　indeed　it

were　the　most　obscureshe　might　well　have　marvelled　that　it　didn't

seem　to　her　more　horrid。　　It　was　either　the　frenz