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sketches of young gentlemen(年轻绅士素描)-第4部分

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the room door after the lady had retired; 'you have very great reason to be 

fond of   your   wife。     Sweet   woman;  Mrs。 Capper;  sir!'           'Nay;  Mincin   …   I 



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beg;'   interposed   the   host;   as   we   were   about   to   reply   that   Mrs。   Capper 

unquestionably was particularly sweet。 'Pray; Mincin; don't。'                 'Why not?' 

exclaimed Mr。 Mincin; 'why not? Why should you feel any delicacy before 

your old friend … OUR old friend; if I may be allowed to call you so; sir; 

why should   you;  I   ask?'      We   of   course   wished   to know  why  he   should 

also; upon which our friend admitted that Mrs。 Capper WAS a very sweet 

woman;   at   which   admission   Mr。        Mincin   cried   'Bravo!'   and   begged     to 

propose Mrs。 Capper with heartfelt enthusiasm; whereupon our host said; 

'Thank   you;   Mincin;'   with   deep   feeling;   and   gave   us;   in   a   low   voice;   to 

understand; that Mincin had saved Mrs。 Capper's cousin's life no less than 

fourteen   times   in   a   year   and   a   half;   which   he   considered   no   common 

circumstance … an opinion to which we most cordially subscribed。 

     Now that we three were left to entertain ourselves with conversation; 

Mr。 Mincin's extreme friendliness became every moment more apparent; 

he was so amazingly friendly; indeed; that it was impossible to talk about 

anything in which he had not the chief concern。                We happened to allude 

to   some   affairs   in   which   our   friend   and   we   had   been   mutually   engaged 

nearly fourteen years before; when Mr。 Mincin was all at once reminded of 

a   joke   which    our   friend   had   made    on  that   day   four  years;   which    he 

positively must insist upon telling … and which he did tell accordingly; with 

many pleasant recollections of what he said; and what Mrs。 Capper said; 

and how he well remembered that they had been to the play with orders on 

the    very   night    previous;    and   had    seen   Romeo      and   Juliet;   and   the 

pantomime; and how Mrs。 Capper being faint had been led into the lobby; 

where she smiled; said it was nothing after all; and went back again; with 

many other interesting and absorbing particulars: after which the friendly 

young gentleman went on to assure us; that our friend had experienced a 

marvellously   prophetic   opinion   of   that   same   pantomime;   which   was   of 

such an admirable kind; that two morning papers took the same view next 

day:    to this our friend replied; with a little triumph; that in that instance 

he had some reason to think he had been correct; which gave the friendly 

young gentleman occasion to believe that our friend was always correct; 

and so we went on; until our friend; filling a bumper; said he must drink 

one   glass   to   his   dear   friend   Mincin;   than   whom   he   would   say   no   man 



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saved the  lives of   his acquaintances   more;  or had   a more  friendly  heart。 

Finally; our friend having emptied his glass; said; 'God bless you; Mincin;' 

… and Mr。 Mincin and he shook hands across the table with much affection 

and earnestness。 

     But great as the friendly  young gentleman is; in a limited scene like 

this; he plays the same part on a larger scale with increased ECLAT。                     Mr。 

Mincin   is   invited   to   an   evening   party  with   his   dear   friends   the   Martins; 

where   he   meets   his   dear   friends   the   Cappers;   and   his   dear   friends   the 

Watsons; and a hundred other dear friends too numerous to mention。                        He 

is   as  much     at  home    with   the   Martins    as  with    the  Cappers;     but   how 

exquisitely   he   balances   his   attentions;   and   divides   them   among   his   dear 

friends!     If he flirts with one of the Miss Watsons; he has one little Martin 

on the sofa pulling his hair; and the other little Martin on the carpet riding 

on his foot。 He carries Mrs。 Watson down to supper on one arm; and Miss 

Martin on the other; and takes wine so judiciously; and in such exact order; 

that it is impossible for the most punctilious old lady to consider herself 

neglected。      If   any   young    lady;   being   prevailed     upon   to  sing;   become 

nervous afterwards; Mr。 Mincin leads her tenderly into the next room; and 

restores   her   with   port   wine;   which   she   must   take   medicinally。       If   any 

gentleman be standing by the piano during the progress of the ballad; Mr。 

Mincin   seizes   him   by   the   arm   at   one   point   of   the   melody;   and   softly 

beating time the while with his head; expresses in dumb show his intense 

perception of the delicacy of the passage。              If anybody's self…love is to be 

flattered; Mr。 Mincin is at hand。          If anybody's overweening vanity is to be 

pampered;   Mr。   Mincin   will   surfeit   it。     What   wonder   that   people   of   all 

stations and ages recognise Mr。 Mincin's friendliness; that he is universally 

allowed   to   be   handsome   as   amiable;   that   mothers   think   him   an   oracle; 

daughters a dear; brothers a beau; and fathers a wonder!                  And who would 

not have the reputation of the very friendly young gentleman? 



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                           SKETCHES OF YOUNG GENTLEMEN 



                THE MILITARY YOUNG 

                           GENTLEMAN 



     We are rather at a loss to imagine how it has come to pass that military 

young gentlemen have obtained so much favour in the eyes of the young 

ladies of this kingdom。        We cannot think so lightly of them as to suppose 

that the mere circumstance of   a man's wearing a   red coat ensures him  a 

ready passport to their regard; and even if this were the case; it would be 

no   satisfactory   explanation   of   the   circumstance;   because;   although        the 

analogy may in some degree hold good in the case of mail coachmen and 

guards;   still   general   postmen   wear   red   coats;   and   THEY   are   not   to   our 

knowledge   better   received   than   other   men;   nor   are   firemen   either;   who 

wear     (or  used   to  wear)   not   only   red  coats;   but  very   resplendent     and 

massive   badges   besides   …   much   larger   than   epaulettes。     Neither   do   the 

twopenny  post…office   boys;   if   the   result   of   our   inquiries   be   correct;   find 

any peculiar favour in woman's eyes; although they wear very bright red 

jackets;    and   have   the  additional    advantage     of  constantly    appearing    in 

public on horseback; which last circumstance may be naturally supposed 

to be greatly in their favour。 

     We have sometimes thought that this phenomenon may take its rise in 

the conventional behaviour of captains and colonels and other gentlemen 

in   red   coats   on   the   stage;   where   they   are   invariably   represented   as   fine 

swaggering fellows; talking of nothing but charming girls; their king and 

country; their honour; and their debts; and crowing over the inferior classes 

of the community; whom they occasionally treat with a little gentlemanly 

swindling; no less to the improvement and pleasure of the audience; than 

to   the   satisfaction   and   approval   of   the   choice   spirits   who   consort   with 

them。     But we will not devote these pages to our speculations upon the 

subject; inasmuch as our business at the present moment is not so much 

with the young ladies who are bewitched by her Majesty's livery as with 

the   young   gentlemen   whose   heads   are   turned   by   it。   For   'heads'   we   had 

written   'brains;'   but   upon   consideration;   we   think   the   former   the   more 



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appropriate word of the two。 

     These     young    gentlemen     may   be   divided    into  two    classes   …  young 

gentlemen      who    are   actually   in  the   army;   and   young    gentlemen      who; 

having an intense and enthusiastic admiration for all things appertaining to 

a   military   life;   are   compelled   by   adverse   fortune   or   adverse   relations   to 

wear out their existence in some ignoble counting…house。                    We will take 

this latter description of military young gentlemen first。 

     The    whole     heart   and   soul   of   the  military    young     gentleman     are 

concentrated in his favourite topic。          There is nothing that he is so learned 

upon as uniforms; he will tell you; without faltering for an instant; what 

the   habiliments   of   any   one   regiment   are   turned   up   with;   what   regiment 

wear stripes down the outside and inside of the leg; and how many buttons 

the Tenth had on their coats; he knows to a fraction how many yards and 

odd inches of gold lace it takes to make an ensign in the Guards; is deeply 

read in the comparative merits of different bands; and the apparelling of 

trumpeters;      and   is  very    luminous     indeed    in   descanting     upon    'crack 

regiments;'     and   the   'crack'   gentlemen     who    compose      them;    of  whose 

mightiness and grandeur he is never tired of telling。 

     We were suggesting to a military young gentleman only the other day; 

after   he   had   related   to   us   several   dazzling   instances   of   the   profusion   of 

half…a…dozen honourable ensign somebodies or nobodies in the articles of 

kid gloves and polished boots; that possib
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