02-after the dance-第2部分

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mired；　I　regarded　them　with　enraptured　sym…
pathy。　　I　was　particularly　impressed　with　the　old
gentleman's　boots。　　They　were　not　the　modern
pointed　affairs；　but　were　made　of　cheap　leather；
squared…toed；　and　evidently　built　by　the　regimental
cobbler。　　In　order　that　his　daughter　might　dress
and　go　out　in　society；　he　did　not　buy　fashionable
boots；　but　wore　home…made　ones；　I　thought；　and
his　square　toes　seemed　to　me　most　touching。　　It
was　obvious　that　in　his　time　he　had　been　a　good
dancer；　but　now　he　was　too　heavy；　and　his　legs　had
not　spring　enough　for　all　the　beautiful　steps　he
tried　to　take。　　Still；　he　contrived　to　go　twice　round
the　room。　　When　at　the　end；　standing　with　legs
apart；　he　suddenly　clicked　his　feet　together　and　fell
on　one　knee；　a　bit　heavily；　and　she　danced　grace…
fully　around　him；　smiling　and　adjusting　her　skirt；
the　whole　room　applauded。

〃Rising　with　an　effort；　he　tenderly　took　his
daughter's　face　between　his　hands。　　He　kissed　her
on　the　forehead；　and　brought　her　to　me；　under　the
impression　that　I　was　her　partner　for　the　mazurka。　
I　said　I　was　not。　　'Well；　never　mind。　just　go
around　the　room　once　with　her；'　he　said；　smil…
ing　kindly；　as　he　replaced　his　sword　in　the
sheath。

〃As　the　contents　of　a　bottle　flow　readily　when
the　first　drop　has　been　poured；　so　my　love　for
Varinka　seemed　to　set　free　the　whole　force　of　lov…
ing　within　me。　　In　surrounding　her　it　embraced　the
world。　　I　loved　the　hostess　with　her　diadem　and
her　shoulders　like　Elizabeth；　and　her　husband　and
her　guests　and　her　footmen；　and　even　the　engineer
Anisimov　who　felt　peevish　towards　me。　　As　for
Varinka's　father；　with　his　home…made　boots　and
his　kind　smile；　so　like　her　own；　I　felt　a　sort　of　ten…
derness　for　him　that　was　almost　rapture。

〃After　supper　I　danced　the　promised　quadrille
with　her；　and　though　I　had　been　infinitely　happy
before；　I　grew　still　happier　every　moment。

〃We　did　not　speak　of　love。　　I　neither　asked
myself　nor　her　whether　she　loved　me。　　It　was
quite　enough　to　know　that　I　loved　her。　　And　I　had
only　one　fearthat　something　might　come　to　in…
terfere　with　my　great　joy。

〃When　I　went　home；　and　began　to　undress　for
the　night；　I　found　it　quite　out　of　the　question。
held　the　little　feather　out　of　her　fan　in　my　hand；
and　one　of　her　gloves　which　she　gave　me　when　I
helped　her　into　the　carriage　after　her　mother。　
Looking　at　these　things；　and　without　closing　my
eyes　I　could　see　her　before　me　as　she　was　for　an
instant　when　she　had　to　choose　between　two　part…
ners。　　She　tried　to　guess　what　kind　of　person
was　represented　in　me；　and　I　could　hear　her
sweet　voice　as　she　said；　'Prideam　I　right？'　and
merrily　gave　me　her　hand。　　At　supper　she　took　the
first　sip　from　my　glass　of　champagne；　looking　at
me　over　the　rim　with　her　caressing　glance。　　But；
plainest　of　all；　I　could　see　her　as　she　danced　with
her　father；　gliding　along　beside　him；　and　looking
at　the　admiring　observers　with　pride　and　happi…
ness。

〃He　and　she　were　united　in　my　mind　in　one
rush　of　pathetic　tenderness。

〃I　was　living　then　with　my　brother；　who　has
since　died。　　He　disliked　going　out；　and　never　went
to　dances；　and　besides；　he　was　busy　preparing　for
his　last　university　examinations；　and　was　leading　a
very　regular　life。　　He　was　asleep。　　I　looked　at
him；　his　head　buried　in　the　pillow　and　half　covered
with　the　quilt；　and　I　affectionately　pitied　him；
pitied　him　for　his　ignorance　of　the　bliss　I　was　ex…
periencing。　　Our　serf　Petrusha　had　met　me　with　a
candle；　ready　to　undress　me；　but　I　sent　him　away。　
His　sleepy　face　and　tousled　hair　seemed　to　me　so
touching。　　Trying　not　to　make　a　noise；　I　went　to
my　room　on　tiptoe　and　sat　down　on　my　bed。　　No；
I　was　too　happy；　I　could　not　sleep。　　Besides；　it
was　too　hot　in　the　rooms。　　Without　taking　off　my
uniform；　I　went　quietly　into　the　hall；　put　on　my
overcoat；　opened　the　front　door　and　stepped　out
into　the　street。

〃It　was　after　four　when　I　had　left　the　ball；
going　home　and　stopping　there　a　while　had　occu…
pied　two　hours；　so　by　the　time　I　went　out　it　was
dawn。　　It　was　regular　carnival　weatherfoggy；
and　the　road　full　of　water…soaked　snow　just　melt…
ing；　and　water　dripping　from　the　eaves。　　Varin…
ka's　family　lived　on　the　edge　of　town　near　a　large
field；　one　end　of　which　was　a　parade　ground：　　at
the　other　end　was　a　boarding…school　for　young
ladies。　　I　passed　through　our　empty　little　street
and　came　to　the　main　thoroughfare；　where　I　met
pedestrians　and　sledges　laden　with　wood；　the　run…
ners　grating　the　road。　　The　horses　swung　with
regular　paces　beneath　their　shining　yokes；　their
backs　covered　with　straw　mats　and　their　heads　wet
with　rain；　while　the　drivers；　in　enormous　boots；
splashed　through　the　mud　beside　the　sledges。　　All
this；　the　very　horses　themselves；　seemed　to　me
stimulating　and　fascinating；　full　of　suggestion。

〃When　I　approached　the　field　near　their　house；
I　saw　at　one　end　of　it；　in　the　direction　of　the　pa…
rade　ground；　something　very　huge　and　black；　and
I　heard　sounds　of　fife　and　drum　proceeding　from
it。　My　heart　had　been　full　of　song；　and　I　had
heard　in　imagination　the　tune　of　the　mazurka；
but　this　was　very　harsh　music。　　It　was　not　pleas…
ant。

〃'What　can　that　be？'　I　thought；　and　went
towards　the　sound　by　a　slippery　path　through　the
centre　of　the　field。　　Walking　about　a　hundred
paces；　I　began　to　distinguish　many　black　objects
through　the　mist。　　They　were　evidently　soldiers。
'It　is　probably　a　drill；'　I　thought。

〃So　I　went　along　in　that　direction　in　company
with　a　blacksmith；　who　wore　a　dirty　coat　and　an
apron；　and　was　carrying　something。　　He　walked
ahead　of　me　as　we　approached　the　place。　　The
soldiers　in　black　uniforms　stood　in　two　rows；　fac…
ing　each　other　motionless；　their　guns　at　rest。　　Be…
hind　them　stood　the　fifes　and　drums；　incessantly
repeating　the　same　unpleasant　tune。

〃'What　are　they　doing？'　I　asked　the　black…
smith；　who　halted　at　my　side。

〃'A　Tartar　is　being　beaten　through　the　ranks
for　his　attempt　to　desert；'　said　the　blacksmith　in
an　angry　tone；　as　he　looked　intently　at　the　far　end
of　the　line。

〃I　looked　in　the　same　direction；　and　saw　be…
tween　the　files　something　horrid　approaching　me。　
The　thing　that　approached　was　a　man；　stripped
to　the　waist；　fastened　with　cords　to　the　guns　of　two
soldiers　who　were　leading　him。　　At　his　side　an
officer　in　overcoat　and　cap　was　walking；　whose
figure　had　a　familiar　look。　　The　victim　advanced
under　the　blows　that　rained　upon　him　from　both
sides；　his　whole　body　plunging；　his　feet　dragging
through　the　snow。　　Now　he　threw　himself　back…
ward；　and　the　subalterns　who　led　him　thrust　him
forward。　　Now　he　fell　forward；　and　they　pulled
him　up　short；　while　ever　at　his　side　marched　the
tall　officer；　with　firm　and　nervous　pace。　　It　was
Varinka's　father；　with　his　rosy　face　and　white
moustache。

〃At　each　stroke　the　man；　as　if　amazed；　turned
his　face；　grimacing　with　pain；　towards　the　side
whence　the　blow　came；　and　showing　his　white　teeth
repeated　the　same　words　over　and　over。　　But　I
could　only　hear　what　the　words　were　when　he　came
quite　near。　　He　did　not　speak　them；　he　sobbed
them　out；

〃'Brothers；　have　mercy　on　me！　Brothers；　have
mercy　on　me！'　But　the　brothers　had；　no　mercy；
and　when　the　procession　came　close　to　me；　I　saw
how　a　soldier　who　stood　opposite　me　took　a　firm
step　forward　and　lifting　his　stick　with　a　whirr；
brought　it　down　upon　the　man's　back。　　The　man
plunged　forward；　but　the　subalterns　pulled　him
back；　and　another　blow　came　down　from　the　other
side；　then　from　this　side　and　then　from　the　other。　
The　colonel　marched　beside　him；　and　looking　now
at　his　feet　and　now　at　the　man；　inhaled　the　air；
puffed　out　his　cheeks；　and　breathed　it　out　between
his　protruded　lips。　　When　they　passed　the　place
where　I　stood；　I　caught　a　glimpse　between　the　two
files　of　the　back　of　the　man　that　was　being　pun…
ished。　　It　was　something　so　many…coloured；　wet；
red；　unnatural；　that　I　could　hardly　believe　it　was　a
human　body。

〃'My　God！'　muttered　the　blacksmith。

The　procession　moved　farther　away。　　The
blows　continued　to　rain　upon　the　writhing；　falling
creature；　the　fifes　shrilled　and　the　drums　beat；　and
the　tall　imposing　figure　of　the　colonel　moved　along…
side　the　man；　just　as　before。　　Then；　suddenly；　the
colonel　stopped；　and　rapidly　approached　a　man　in
the　ranks。

〃'I'll　teach　you　to　hit　him　gently；'　I　heard　his
furious　voice　say。　　'Will　you　pat　him　like　that？
Will　you？'　and　I　saw　how　his　strong　hand　in　the
suede　glove　struck　the　weak；　bloodless；　terrified
soldier　for　not　bringing　down　his　stick　with　suffi…
cient　strength　on　the　red　neck　of　the　Tartar。

〃'Bring　new　sticks！'　he　cried；　and　looking
round；　he　saw　me。　　Assuming　an　air　of　not　know…
ing　me；　and　with　a　ferocious；　angry　frown；　he
hastily　turned　away。　　I　felt　so　utterly　ashamed
that　I　didn't　know　where　to　look。　　It　was　as　if　I
had　been　detected　in　a　disgraceful　act。　　I　dropped
my　eyes；　and　quickly　hurried　home。　　All　the　way
I　had　the　drums　beating　and　the　fifes　whistling　in
my　ears。　　And　I　heard　the　words；　'Brothers；　have
mercy　on　me！'　or　'Will　you　pat　him？　Will
you？'　My　heart　was　full　of　physical　disgust　that
was　almost　sickness。　　So　much　so　that　I　halted　sev…
eral　times　on　my　way；　for　I　had　the　feeling　that　I
was　going　to　be　really　sick　from　all　the　horrors
that　possessed　me　at　that　sight。　　I　do　not　remem…
ber　how　I　got　home　and　got　to　bed。　　But　the　mo…
ment　I　was　about　to　fall　asleep　I　heard　and　saw
again　all　that　had　happened；　and　I　sprang　up。

〃'Evidently　he　knows　something　I　do　not
know；'　I　thought　about　the　colonel。　　'If　I　knew
what　he　knows　I　should　certainly　graspunder…
standwhat　I　have　just　seen；　and　it　would　not
cause　me　such　suffering。'

〃But　however　much　I　thought　about　it；　I　could
not　understand　the　thing　that　the　colonel　knew。　
It　was　evening　before　I　could　get　to　sleep；　and　then
only　after　calling　on　a　friend　and　drinking　till　I；
was　quite　drunk。

〃Do　you　think　I　had　come　to　the　conclusion　that
the　deed　I　had　witnessed　was　wicked？　Oh；　no。　
Since　it　was　done　with　such　assurance；　and　was　rec…
ognised　by　every　one　as　indispensable；　they　doubt…
less　knew　something　which　I　did　not　know。　　So　I
thought；　and　tried　to　understand。　　But　no　matter；
I　could　n