how to fail in literature-第3部分

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can　go　wandering　away　with　it　from　the　immediate　subject　。　。　。　In

truth　all　art　does　but　consist　in　the　removal　of　surplusage；　from　the

last　finish　of　the　gem　engraver　blowing　away　the　last　particle　of

invisible　dust；　back　to　the　earliest　divination　of　the　finished　work

to　be　lying　somewhere；　according　to　Michel　Angelo's　fancy；　in　the

rough…hewn　block　of　stone。〃



Excellent；　but　does　this　apply　to　every　kind　of　literary　art？　　What

would　become　of　Montaigne　if　you　blew　away　his　allusions；　and　drove

him　out　of　〃the　allusive　way；〃　where　he　gathers　and　binds　so　many

flowers　from　all　the　gardens　and　all　the　rose…hung　lanes　of

literature？　　Montaigne　sets　forth　to　write　an　Essay　on　Coaches。　　He

begins　with　a　few　remarks　on　seasickness　in　the　common　pig；　some

notes　on　the　Pont　Neuf　at　Paris　follow；　and　a　theory　of　why　tyrants

are　detested　by　men　whom　they　have　obliged；　a　glance　at　Coaches　is

then　given；　next　a　study　of　Montezuma's　gardens；　presently　a　brief

account　of　the　Spanish　cruelties　in　Mexico　and　Peru；　lastretombons

a　nos　cocheshe　tells　a　tale　of　the　Inca；　and　the　devotion　of　his

Guard：　　Another　for　Hector！



The　allusive　style　has　its　proper　place；　like　another；　if　it　is　used

by　the　right　man；　and　the　concentrated　and　structural　style　has　also

its　higher　province。　　It　would　not　do　to　employ　either　style　in　the

wrong　place。　　In　a　rambling　discursive　essay；　for　example；　a　mere

straying　after　the　bird　in　the　branches；　or　the　thorn　in　the　way；　he

might　not　take　the　safest　road　who　imitated　Mr。　Pater's　style　in　what

follows：



〃In　this　way；　according　to　the　well…known　saying；　'The　style　is　the

man；'　complex　or　simple；　in　his　individuality；　his　plenary　sense　of

what　he　really　has　to　say；　his　sense　of　the　world：　　all　cautions

regarding　style　arising　out　of　so　many　natural　scruples　as　to　the

medium　through　which　alone　he　can　expose　that　inward　sense　of　things；

the　purity　of　this　medium；　its　laws　or　tricks　of　refraction：　　nothing

is　to　be　left　there　which　might　give　conveyance　to　any　matter　save

that。〃　　Clearly　the　author　who　has　to　write　so　that　the　man　may　read

who　runs　will　fail　if　he　wrests　this　manner　from　its　proper　place；

and　uses　it　for　casual　articles：　　he　will　fail　to　hold　the　vagrom

attention！



Thus　a　great　deal　may　be　done　by　studying　inappropriateness　of　style；

by　adopting　a　style　alien　to　our　matter　and　to　our　audience。　　If　we

〃haver〃　discursively　about　serious；　and　difficult；　and　intricate

topics；　we　fail；　and　we　fail　if　we　write　on　happy；　pleasant；　and

popular　topics　in　an　abstruse　and　intent；　and　analytic　style。　　We

fail；　too；　if　in　style　we　go　outside　our　natural　selves。　　〃The　style

is　the　man；〃　and　the　man　will　be　nothing；　and　nobody；　if　he　tries　for

an　incongruous　manner；　not　naturally　his　own；　for　example　if　Miss

Yonge　were　suddenly　to　emulate　the　manner　of　Lever；　or　if　Mr。　John

Morley　were　to　strive　to　shine　in　the　fashion　of　Uncle　Remus；　or　if

Mr。　Rider　Haggard　were　to　be　allured　into　imitation　by　the　example；

so　admirable　in　itself；　of　the　Master　of　Balliol。　　It　is　ourselves　we

must　try　to　improve；　our　attentiveness；　our　interest　in　life；　our

seriousness　of　purpose；　and　then　the　style　will　improve　with　the

self。　　Or　perhaps；　to　be　perfectly　frank；　we　shall　thus　convert

ourselves　into　prigs；　throw　ourselves　out　of　our　stride；　lapse　into

self…　consciousness；　lose　all　that　is　natural；　naif；　and　instinctive

within　us。　　Verily　there　are　many　dangers；　and　the　paths　to　failure

are　infinite。



So　much　for　style；　of　which　it　may　generally　be　said　that　you　cannot

be　too　obscure；　unnatural；　involved；　vulgar；　slipshod；　and

metaphorical。　　See　to　it　that　your　metaphors　are　mixed；　though；

perhaps；　this　attention　is　hardly　needed。　　The　free　use　of

parentheses；　in　which　a　reader　gets　lost；　and　of　unintelligible

allusions；　and　of　references　to　unread　authorsthe　Kalevala　and

Lycophron；　and　the　Scholiast　on　Apollonius　Rhodius；　is　invaluable　to

this　end。　　So　much　for　manner；　and　now　for　matter。



The　young　author　generally　writes　because　he　wants　to　write；　either

for　money；　from　vanity；　or　in　mere　weariness　of　empty　hours　and

anxiety　to　astonish　his　relations。　　This　is　well；　he　who　would　fail

cannot　begin　better　than　by　having　nothing　to　say。　　The　less　you

observe；　the　less　you　reflect；　the　less　you　put　yourself　in　the　paths

of　adventure　and　experience；　the　less　you　will　have　to　say；　and　the

more　impossible　will　it　be　to　read　your　work。　　Never　notice　people's

manner；　conduct；　nor　even　dress；　in　real　life。　　Walk　through　the

world　with　your　eyes　and　ears　closed；　and　embody　the　negative　results

in　a　story　or　a　poem。　　As　to　Poetry；　with　a　fine　instinct　we

generally　begin　by　writing　verse；　because　verse　is　the　last　thing

that　the　public　want　to　read。　　The　young　writer　has　usually　read　a

great　deal　of　verse；　however；　and　most　of　it　bad。　　His　favourite

authors　are　the　bright　lyrists　who　sing　of　broken　hearts；　wasted

lives；　early　deaths；　disappointment；　gloom。　　Without　having　even　had

an　unlucky　flirtation；　or　without　knowing　what　it　is　to　lose　a

favourite　cat；　the　early　author　pours　forth　laments；　just　like　the

laments　he　has　been　reading。　　He　has　too　a　favourite　manner；　the　old

consumptive　manner；　about　the　hectic　flush；　the　fatal　rose　on　the

pallid　cheek；　about　the　ruined　roof　tree；　the　empty　chair；　the　rest

in　the　village　churchyard。　　This　is　now　a　little　rococo　and　forlorn；

but　failure　may　be　assured　by　travelling　in　this　direction。　　If　you

are　ambitious　to　disgust　an　editor　at　once；　begin　your　poem　with

〃Only。〃　　In　fact　you　may　as　well　head　the　lyric　〃Only。〃　｛4｝





ONLY。



Only　a　spark　of　an　ember；

Only　a　leaf　on　the　tree；

Only　the　days　we　remember；

Only　the　days　without　thee。

Only　the　flower　that　thou　worest；

Only　the　book　that　we　read；

Only　that　night　in　the　forest；

Only　a　dream　of　the　dead；

Only　the　troth　that　was　broken；

Only　the　heart　that　is　lonely；

Only　the　sigh　and　the　token

That　sob　in　the　saying　of　Only！





In　literature　this　is　a　certain　way　of　failing；　but　I　believe　a

person　might　make　a　livelihood　by　writing　verses　like　thesefor

music。　　Another　good　way　is　to　be　very　economical　in　your　rhymes；

only　two　to　the　four　lines；　and　regretfully　vague。　　Thus：





SHADOWS。



In　the　slumber　of　the　winter；

In　the　secret　of　the　snow；

What　is　the　voice　that　is　crying

Out　of　the　long　ago？



When　the　accents　of　the　children

Are　silent　on　the　stairs；

When　the　poor　forgets　his　troubles；

And　the　rich　forgets　his　cares。



What　is　the　silent　whisper

That　echoes　in　the　room；

When　the　days　are　full　of　darkness；

And　the　night　is　hushed　in　gloom？



'Tis　the　voice　of　the　departed；

Who　will　never　come　again；

Who　has　left　the　weary　tumult；

And　the　struggle　and　the　pain。　｛5｝



And　my　heart　makes　heavy　answer；

To　the　voice　that　comes　no　more；

To　the　whisper　that　is　welling

From　the　far　off　happy　shore。



If　you　are　not　satisfied　with　these　simple　ways　of　not　succeeding；

please　try　the　Grosvenor　Gallery　style。　　Here　the　great　point　is　to

make　the　rhyme　arrive　at　the　end　of　a　very　long　word；　you　should　also

be　free　with　your　alliterations。





LULLABY。



When　the　sombre　night　is　dumb；

Hushed　the　loud　chrysanthemum；

Sister；　sleep！

Sleep；　the　lissom　lily　saith；

Sleep；　the　poplar　whispereth；

Soft　and　deep！



Filmy　floats　the　wild　woodbine；

Jonquil；　jacinth；　jessamine；

Float　and　flow。

Sleeps　the　water　wild　and　wan；

As　in　far　off　Toltecan

Mexico。



See；　upon　the　sun…dial；

Waves　the　midnight's　misty　pall；

Waves　and　wakes。

As；　in　tropic　Timbuctoo；

Water　beasts　go　plashing　through

Lilied　lakes！





Alliteration　is　a　splendid　source　of　failure　in　this　sort　of　poetry；

and　adjectives　like　lissom；　filmy；　weary；　weird；　strange；　make；　or

ought　to　make；　the　rejection　of　your　manuscript　a　certainty。　　The

poem　should；　as　a　rule；　seem　to　be　addressed　to　an　unknown　person；

and　should　express　regret　and　despair　for　circumstances　in　the　past

with　which　the　reader　is　totally　unacquainted。　　Thus：





GHOSTS。



We　met　at　length；　as　Souls　that　sit

At　funeral　feast；　and　taste　of　it；

And　empty　were　the　words　we　said；

As　fits　the　converse　of　the　dead；

For　it　is　long　ago；　my　dear；

Since　we　two　met　in　living　cheer；

Yea；　we　have　long　been　ghosts；　you　know；

And　alien　ways　we　twain　must　go；

Nor　shall　we　meet　in　Shadow　Land；

Till　Time's　glass；　empty　of　its　sand；

Is　filled　up　of　Eternity。

Farewellenough　for　once　to　die　…

And　far　too　much　it　is　to　dream；

And　taste　not　the　Lethaean　stream；

But　bear　the　pain　of　loves　unwed

Even　here；　even　here；　among　the　dead！





That　is　a　cheerful　intelligible　kind　of　melody；　which　is　often

practised　with　satisfactory　results。　　Every　form　of　imitation

（imitating　of　course　only　the　faults　of　a　favourite　writer）　is　to　be

recommended。



Imitation　does　a　double　service；　it　secures　the　failure　of　the

imitator　and　also　aids　that　of　the　unlucky　author　who　is　imitated。

As　soon　as　a　new　thing　appears　in　literature；　many　people　hurry　off

to　attempt　something　of　the　same　sort。　　It　may　be　a　particular　trait

and　accent　in　poetry；　and　the　public；　weary　of　the　mimicries；　begin

to　dislike　the　original。





〃Most　can　grow　the　flowers　now；

For　all　have　got　the　seed；

And　once　again　the　people

Call　it　but　a　weed。〃





In　fiction；　if　somebody　brings　in　a　curious　kind　of　murder；　or　a

study　of　religious　problems；　or　a　treasure　hunt；　or　what　you　will；

others　imitate　till　the　world　is　weary　of　murders；　or　theological

flirtations；　or　the　search　for　buried　specie；　and　the　original

authors　themselves　will　fail；　unless　they　fish　out　something　new；　to

be　vulgarised　afresh。　　Therefore；　imitation　is　distinctly　to　be　urged

on　the　young　author。



As　a　rule；　his　method　is　this；　he　reads　very　little；　but　all　that　he

reads　is　BAD。　　The　feeblest　articles　in　the　w