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mugby junction(马格比岔口)-第14部分
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person who should propose in England that there should be kept; say at
our own model Mugby Junction; pretty baskets; each holding an assorted
cold lunch and dessert for one; each at a certain fixed price; and each
within a passenger's power to take away; to empty in the carriage at perfect
leisure; and to return at another station fifty or a hundred miles farther
on?〃
There was disagreement what such a person should be called。
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MUGBY JUNCTION
Whether revolutionise; atheist; Bright (I said him); or Un…English。 Miss
Piff screeched her shrill opinion last; in the words: 〃A malignant
maniac!〃
〃I adopt;〃 says Our Missis; 〃the brand set upon such a person by the
righteous indignation of my friend Miss Piff。 A malignant maniac。 Know;
then; that that malignant maniac has sprung from the congenial soil of
France; and that his malignant madness was in unchecked action on this
same part of my journey。〃
I noticed that Sniff was a…rubbing his hands; and that Mrs。 Sniff had
got her eye upon him。 But I did not take more particular notice; owing to
the excited state in which the young ladies was; and to feeling myself
called upon to keep it up with a howl。
〃On my experience south of Paris;〃 said Our Missis; in a deep tone; 〃I
will not expatiate。 Too loathsome were the task! But fancy this。
Fancy a guard coming round; with the train at full speed; to inquire how
many for dinner。 Fancy his telegraphing forward the number of dinners。
Fancy every one expected; and the table elegantly laid for the complete
party。 Fancy a charming dinner; in a charming room; and the head…cook;
concerned for the honour of every dish; superintending in his clean white
jacket and cap。 Fancy the Beast travelling six hundred miles on end;
very fast; and with great punctuality; yet being taught to expect all this to
be done for it!〃
A spirited chorus of 〃The Beast!〃
I noticed that Sniff was agin a…rubbing his stomach with a soothing
hand; and that he had drored up one leg。 But agin I didn't take particular
notice; looking on myself as called upon to stimulate public feeling。 It
being a lark besides。
〃Putting everything together;〃 said Our Missis; 〃French
Refreshmenting comes to this; and oh; it comes to a nice total! First:
eatable things to eat; and drinkable things to drink。〃
A groan from the young ladies; kep' up by me。
〃Second: convenience; and even elegance。〃
Another groan from the young ladies; kep' up by me。
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〃Third: moderate charges。〃
This time a groan from me; kep' up by the young ladies。
〃Fourth:… and here;〃 says Our Missis; 〃I claim your angriest
sympathy;attention; common civility; nay; even politeness!〃
Me and the young ladies regularly raging mad all together。
〃And I cannot in conclusion;〃 says Our Missis; with her spitefullest
sneer; 〃give you a completer pictur of that despicable nation (after what I
have related); than assuring you that they wouldn't bear our constitutional
ways and noble independence at Mugby Junction; for a single month; and
that they would turn us to the right…about and put another system in our
places; as soon as look at us; perhaps sooner; for I do not believe they have
the good taste to care to look at us twice。〃
The swelling tumult was arrested in its rise。 Sniff; bore away by his
servile disposition; had drored up his leg with a higher and a higher relish;
and was now discovered to be waving his corkscrew over his head。 It
was at this moment that Mrs。 Sniff; who had kep' her eye upon him like
the fabled obelisk; descended on her victim。 Our Missis followed them
both out; and cries was heard in the sawdust department。
You come into the Down Refreshment Room; at the Junction; making
believe you don't know me; and I'll pint you out with my right thumb over
my shoulder which is Our Missis; and which is Miss Whiff; and which is
Miss Piff; and which is Mrs。 Sniff。 But you won't get a chance to see
Sniff; because he disappeared that night。 Whether he perished; tore to
pieces; I cannot say; but his corkscrew alone remains; to bear witness to
the servility of his disposition。
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