letters to dead authors-第6部分

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POSITIVIST：　　A　distinguished　position　in　the　Choir　Invisible；　but　not；　of　course；　conscious　immortality。

PURCHASER：　　Take　him　away；　and　put　up　another　lot。

Then　the　Hegelian；　with　his　Notion；　and　the　Darwinian；　with　his　notions；　and　the　Lotzian；　with　his　Broad　Church　mixture　of　Religion　and　Evolution；　and　the　Spencerian；　with　that　Absolute　which　is　a　sort　of　a　something；　might　all　be　offered　with　their　divers　wares；　and　cheaply　enough；　Lucian；　you　would　value　them　in　this　auction　of　Sects。　　〃There　is　but　one　way　to　Corinth；〃　as　of　old；　but　which　that　way　may　be；　oh　master　of　Hermotimus；　we　know　no　more　than　he　did　of　old；　and　still　we　find；　of　all　philosophies；　that　the　Stoic　route　is　most　to　be　recommended。　　But　we　have　our　Cyrenaics　too；　though　they　are　no　longer　〃clothed　in　purple；　and　crowned　with　flowers；　and　fond　of　drink　and　of　female　flute…players。〃　　Ah；　here　too；　you　might　laugh；　and　fail　to　see　where　the　Pleasure　lies；　when　the　Cyrenaics　are　no　〃judges　of　cakes〃　（nor　of　ale；　for　that　matter）；　and　are　strangers　in　the　Courts　of　Princes。　　〃To　despise　all　things；　to　make　use　of　all　things；　in　all　things　to　follow　pleasure　only：〃　that　is　not　the　manner　of　the　new；　if　it　were　the　secret　of　the　older　Hedonism。

Then；　turning　from　the　philosophers　to　the　seekers　after　a　sign；　what　change；　Lucian；　would　you　find　in　them　and　their　ways？　　None；　they　are　quite　unaltered。　　Still　our　Peregrinus；　and　our　Peregrina　too；　come　to　us　from　the　East；　or；　if　from　the　West；　they　take　India　on　their　wayIndia；　that　secular　home　of　drivelling　creeds；　and　of　religion　in　its　sacerdotage。　　Still　they　prattle　of　Brahmins　and　Buddhism；　though；　unlike　Peregrinus；　they　do　not　publicly　burn　themselves　on　pyres；　at　Epsom　Downs；　after　the　Derby。　　We　are　not　so　fortunate　in　the　demise　of　our　Theosophists；　and　our　police；　less　wise　than　the　Hellenodicae；　would　probably　not　permit　the　Immolation　of　the　Quack。　　Like　your　Alexander；　they　deal　in　marvels　and　miracles；　oracles　and　warnings。　　All　such　bogy　stories　as　those　of　your　〃Philopseudes；〃　and　the　ghost　of　the　lady　who　took　to　table…　rapping　because　one　of　her　best　slippers　had　not　been　burned　with　her　body；　are　gravely　investigated　by　the　Psychical　Society。

Even　your　ignorant　Bibliophile　is　still　with　usthe　man　without　a　tinge　of　letters；　who　buys　up　old　manuscripts　〃because　they　are　stained　and　gnawed；　and　who　goes；　for　proof　of　valued　antiquity；　to　the　testimony　of　the　book…worms。〃　　And　the　rich　Bibliophile　now；　as　in　your　satire；　clothes　his　volumes　in　purple　morocco　and　gay　dorures；　while　their　contents　are　sealed　to　him。

As　to　the　topics　of　satire　and　gay　curiosity　which　occupy　the　lady　known　as　〃Gyp；〃　and　M。　Halevy　in　his　〃Les　Petites　Cardinal；〃　if　you　had　not　exhausted　the　matter　in　your　〃Dialogues　of　Hetairai；〃　you　would　be　amused　to　find　the　same　old　traits　surviving　without　a　touch　of　change。　　One　reads；　in　Halevy's　French；　of　Madame　Cardinal；　and；　in　your　Greek；　of　the　mother　of　Philinna；　and　marvels　that　eighteen　hundred　years　have　not　in　one　single　trifle　altered　the　mould。　　Still　the　old　shabby　light…loves；　the　old　greed；　the　old　luxury　and　squalor。　　Still　the　unconquerable　superstition　that　now　seeks　to　tell　fortunes　by　the　cards；　and；　in　your　time；　resorted　to　the　sorceress　with　her　magical　〃bull…roarer〃　or　turndun。　｛6｝

Yes；　Lucian；　we　are　the　same　vain　creatures　of　doubt　and　dread；　of　unbelief　and　credulity；　of　avarice　and　pretence；　that　you　knew；　and　at　whom　you　smiled。　　Nay；　our　very　〃social　question〃　is　not　altered。　Do　you　not　write；　in　〃The　Runaways；〃　〃The　artisans　will　abandon　their　workshops；　and　leave　their　trades；　when　they　see　that；　with　all　the　labour　that　bows　their　bodies　from　dawn　to　dark；　they　make　a　petty　and　starveling　pittance；　while　men　that　toil　not　nor　spin　are　floating　in　Pactolus〃？

They　begin　to　see　this　again　as　of　yore；　but　whether　the　end　of　their　vision　will　be　a　laughing　matter；　you；　fortunate　Lucian；　do　not　need　to　care。　　Hail　to　you；　and　farewell！



LETTERTo　Maitre　Francoys　Rabelais。　　Of　the　coming　of　the　Coqcigrues。



Master；In　the　Boreal　and　Septentrional　lands；　turned　aside　from　the　noonday　and　the　sun；　there　dwelt　of　old　（as　thou　knowest；　and　as　Olaus　voucheth）　a　race　of　men；　brave；　strong；　nimble；　and　adventurous；　who　had　no　other　care　but　to　fight　and　drink。　　There；　by　reason　of　the　cold　（as　Virgil　witnesseth）；　men　break　wine　with　axes。　　To　their　minds；　when　once　they　were　dead　and　gotten　to　Valhalla；　or　the　place　of　their　Gods；　there　would　be　no　other　pleasure　but　to　swig；　tipple；　drink；　and　boose　till　the　coming　of　that　last　darkness　and　Twilight；　wherein　they；　with　their　deities；　should　do　battle　against　the　enemies　of　all　mankind；　which　day　they　rather　desired　than　dreaded。

So　chanced　it　also　with　Pantagruel　and　Brother　John　and　their　company；　after　they　had　once　partaken　of　the　secret　of　the　Dive　Bouteille。　　Thereafter　they　searched　no　longer；　but；　abiding　at　their　ease；　were　merry；　frolic；　jolly；　gay；　glad；　and　wise；　only　that　they　always　and　ever　did　expect　the　awful　Coming　of　the　Coqcigrues。　　Now　concerning　the　day　of　that　coming；　and　the　nature　of　them　that　should　come；　they　knew　nothing；　and　for　his　part　Panurge　was　all　the　more　adread；　as　Aristotle　testifieth　that　men　（and　Panurge　above　others）　most　fear　that　which　they　know　least。　Now　it　chanced　one　day；　as　they　sat　at　meat；　with　viands　rare；　dainty；　and　precious　as　ever　Apicius　dreamed　of；　that　there　fluttered　on　the　air　a　faint　sound　as　of　sermons；　speeches；　orations；　addresses；　discourses；　lectures；　and　the　like；　whereat　Panurge；　pricking　up　his　ears；　cried；　〃Methinks　this　wind　bloweth　from　Midlothian；〃　and　so　fell　a　trembling。

Next；　to　their　aural　orifices；　and　the　avenues　audient　of　the　brain；　was　borne　a　very　melancholy　sound　as　of　harmoniums；　hymns；　organ…　pianos；　psalteries；　and　the　like；　all　playing　different　airs；　in　a　kind　most　hateful　to　the　Muses。　　Then　said　Panurge；　as　well　as　he　might　for　the　chattering　of　his　teeth：　　〃May　I　never　drink　if　here　come　not　the　Coqcigrues！〃　and　this　saying　and　prophecy　of　his　was　true　and　inspired。　　But　thereon　the　others　began　to　mock；　flout；　and　gird　at　Panurge　for　his　cowardice。　　〃Here　am　I！〃　cried　Brother　John；　〃well…armed　and　ready　to　stand　a　siege；　being　entrenched；　fortified；　hemmed…in　and　surrounded　with　great　pasties；　huge　pieces　of　salted　beef；　salads；　fricassees；　hams；　tongues；　pies；　and　a　wilderness　of　pleasant　little　tarts；　jellies；　pastries；　trifles；　and　fruits　of　all　kinds；　and　I　shall　not　thirst　while　I　have　good　wells；　founts；　springs；　and　sources　of　Bordeaux　wine；　Burgundy；　wine　of　the　Champagne　country；　sack　and　Canary。　　A　fig　for　thy　Coqcigrues！〃

But　even　as　he　spoke　there　ran　up　suddenly　a　whole　legion；　or　rather　army；　of　physicians；　each　armed　with　laryngoscopes；　stethoscopes；　horoscopes；　microscopes；　weighing　machines；　and　such　other　tools；　engines；　and　arms　as　they　had　who；　after　thy　time；　persecuted　Monsieur　de　Pourceaugnac！　　And　they　all；　rushing　on　Brother　John；　cried　out　to　him；　〃Abstain！　　Abstain！〃　　And　one　said；　〃I　have　well　diagnosed　thee；　and　thou　art　in　a　fair　way　to　have　the　gout。〃　　〃I　never　did　better　in　my　days；〃　said　Brother　John。　　〃Away　with　thy　meats　and　drinks！〃　they　cried。　　And　one　said；　〃He　must　to　Royat；〃　and　another；　〃Hence　with　him　to　Aix；〃　and　a　third；　〃Banish　him　to　Wiesbaden；〃　and　a　fourth；　〃Hale　him　to　Gastein；〃　and　yet　another；　〃To　Barbouille　with　him　in　chains！〃

And　while　others　felt　his　pulse　and　looked　at　his　tongue；　they　all　wrote　prescriptions　for　him　like　men　mad。　　〃For　thy　eating；〃　cried　he　that　seemed　to　be　their　leader；　〃No　soup！〃　　〃No　soup！〃　quoth　Brother　John；　and　those　cheeks　of　his；　whereat　you　might　have　warmed　your　two　hands　in　the　winter　solstice；　grew　white　as　lilies。　　〃Nay！　and　no　salmon；　nor　any　beef　nor　mutton！　　A　little　chicken　by　times；　pericolo　tuo！　　Nor　any　game；　such　as　grouse；　partridge；　pheasant；　capercailzie；　wild　duck；　nor　any　cheese；　nor　fruit；　nor　pastry；　nor　coffee；　nor　eau　de　vie；　and　avoid　all　sweets。　　No　veal；　pork；　nor　made　dishes　of　any　kind。〃　　〃Then　what　may　I　eat？〃　quoth　the　good　Brother；　whose　valour　had　oozed　out　of　the　soles　of　his　sandals。　　〃A　little　cold　bacon　at　breakfastno　eggs；〃　quoth　the　leader　of　the　strange　folk；　〃and　a　slice　of　toast　without　butter。〃　　〃And　for　thy　drink〃（〃What？〃　gasped　Brother　John）〃one　dessert…spoonful　of　whisky；　with　a　pint　of　the　water　of　Apollinaris　at　luncheon　and　dinner。　　No　more！〃　　At　this　Brother　John　fainted；　falling　like　a　great　buttress　of　a　hill；　such　as　Taygetus　or　Erymanthus。

While　they　were　busy　with　him；　others　of　the　frantic　folk　had　built　great　platforms　of　wood；　whereon　they　all　stood　and　spoke　at　once；　both　men　and　women。　　And　of　these　some　wore　red　crosses　on　their　garments；　which　meaneth　〃Salvation；〃　and　others　wore　white　crosses；　with　a　little　black　button　of　crape；　to　signify　〃Purity；〃　and　others　bits　of　blue　to　mean　〃Abstinence。〃　　While　some　of　these　pursued　Panurge　others　did　beset　Pantagruel；　asking　him　very　long　questions；　whereunto　he　gave　but　short　answers。　　Thus　they　asked：…

Have　ye　Local　Option　here？Pan。：　　What？

May　one　man　drink　if　his　neighbour　be　not　athirst？Pan。：　　Yea！

Have　ye　Free　Education？Pan。：　　What？

Must　they　that　have；　pay　to　school　them　that　have　not？Pan。：　　Nay！

Have　ye　free　land？Pan。：　　What？

Have　ye　taken　the　land　from　the　farmer；　and　given　it　to　the　tailor　out　of　work　and　the　candlemaker　masterless？Pan。：　　Nay！

Have　your　women　folk　votes？Pan。：　　Bosh！

Have　ye　got　religion？Pan。：　　How？

Do　you　go　about　the　streets　at　night；　brawling；　blowing　a　trumpet　before　you；　and　making　long　prayers？Pan。：　　Nay！

Have　you　manhood　suffrage？Pan。：　　Eh？

Is　Jack　as　good　as　his　master？Pan。：　　Nay！

Have　you　joined　the　Arbitration　Society？Pan。：　　Quoy？

Will　you　let　another　kick　you；　and　will　you　ask　his　neighbour　if　you　deserve　the　same？Pan。：　　Nay！

Do　you　eat　what　you　list？Pan。：　　Ay！

Do　you　drink　when　you　are　athirst？Pan。：　　Ay！

Are　you　governed　by　the　free　expression　of　the　popular　will？Pan。：　How？

Are　you　servants　of　priests；　pulpits；　and　penny　papers？Pan。：　　NO！

Now；　when　they　heard　these　answers　of　Pantagruel　they　all　fell；　some　a　weeping；　some　a　praying；　some　a　swearing；　some　an　arbitrating；　some　a　lecturing；　some　a　caucussing；