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the way of the world-第14部分
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split would make just four of you。
WIT。 Thou dost bite; my dear mustard…seed; kiss me for that。
PET。 Stand offI'll kiss no more malesI have kissed your Twin
yonder in a humour of reconciliation till he 'hiccup' rises upon my
stomach like a radish。
MILLA。 Eh! filthy creature; what was the quarrel?
PET。 There was no quarrel; there might have been a quarrel。
WIT。 If there had been words enow between 'em to have expressed
provocation; they had gone together by the ears like a pair of
castanets。
PET。 You were the quarrel。
MILLA。 Me?
PET。 If I have a humour to quarrel; I can make less matters
conclude premises。 If you are not handsome; what then? If I have a
humour to prove it? If I shall have my reward; say so; if not;
fight for your face the next time yourselfI'll go sleep。
WIT。 Do; wrap thyself up like a woodlouse; and dream revenge。 And;
hear me; if thou canst learn to write by to…morrow morning; pen me a
challenge。 I'll carry it for thee。
PET。 Carry your mistress's monkey a spider; go flea dogs and read
romances。 I'll go to bed to my maid。
MRS。 FAIN。 He's horridly drunkhow came you all in this pickle?
WIT。 A plot; a plot; to get rid of the knightyour husband's
advice; but he sneaked off。
SCENE X。
SIR WILFULL; drunk; LADY WISHFORT; WITWOUD; MRS。 MILLAMANT; MRS。
FAINALL。
LADY。 Out upon't; out upon't; at years of discretion; and comport
yourself at this rantipole rate!
SIR WIL。 No offence; aunt。
LADY。 Offence? As I'm a person; I'm ashamed of you。 Fogh! How
you stink of wine! D'ye think my niece will ever endure such a
Borachio? You're an absolute Borachio。
SIR WIL。 Borachio?
LADY。 At a time when you should commence an amour; and put your
best foot foremost …
SIR WIL。 'Sheart; an you grutch me your liquor; make a bill。Give
me more drink; and take my purse。 'Sings':…
Prithee fill me the glass;
Till it laugh in my face;
With ale that is potent and mellow;
He that whines for a lass
Is an ignorant ass;
For a bumper has not its fellow。
But if you would have me marry my cousin; say the word; and I'll
do't。 Wilfull will do't; that's the word。 Wilfull will do't;
that's my crest;my motto I have forgot。
LADY。 My nephew's a little overtaken; cousin; but 'tis drinking
your health。 O' my word; you are obliged to him …
SIR WIL。 IN VINO VERITAS; aunt。 If I drunk your health to…day;
cousin;I am a Borachio。But if you have a mind to be married; say
the word and send for the piper; Wilfull will do't。 If not; dust it
away; and let's have t'other round。 Tonyods…heart; where's Tony?…
…Tony's an honest fellow; but he spits after a bumper; and that's a
fault。
We'll drink and we'll never ha' done; boys;
Put the glass then around with the sun; boys;
Let Apollo's example invite us;
For he's drunk every night;
And that makes him so bright;
That he's able next morning to light us。
The sun's a good pimple; an honest soaker; he has a cellar at your
antipodes。 If I travel; aunt; I touch at your antipodesyour
antipodes are a good rascally sort of topsy…turvy fellows。 If I had
a bumper I'd stand upon my head and drink a health to 'em。 A match
or no match; cousin with the hard name; aunt; Wilfull will do't。 If
she has her maidenhead let her look to 't; if she has not; let her
keep her own counsel in the meantime; and cry out at the nine
months' end。
MILLA。 Your pardon; madam; I can stay no longer。 Sir Wilfull grows
very powerful。 Egh! how he smells! I shall be overcome if I stay。
Come; cousin。
SCENE XI。
LADY WISHFORT; SIR WILFULL WITWOUD; MR。 WITWOUD; FOIBLE。
LADY。 Smells? He would poison a tallow…chandler and his family。
Beastly creature; I know not what to do with him。 Travel; quotha;
ay; travel; travel; get thee gone; get thee but far enough; to the
Saracens; or the Tartars; or the Turksfor thou art not fit to live
in a Christian commonwealth; thou beastly pagan。
SIR WIL。 Turks? No; no Turks; aunt。 Your Turks are infidels; and
believe not in the grape。 Your Mahometan; your Mussulman is a dry
stinkard。 No offence; aunt。 My map says that your Turk is not so
honest a man as your ChristianI cannot find by the map that your
Mufti is orthodox; whereby it is a plain case that orthodox is a
hard word; aunt; and 'hiccup' Greek for claret。 'Sings':…
To drink is a Christian diversion;
Unknown to the Turk or the Persian。
Let Mahometan fools
Live by heathenish rules;
And be damned over tea…cups and coffee。
But let British lads sing;
Crown a health to the King;
And a fig for your Sultan and Sophy。
Ah; Tony! 'FOIBLE whispers LADY W。'
LADY。 Sir Rowland impatient? Good lack! what shall I do with this
beastly tumbril? Go lie down and sleep; you sot; or as I'm a
person; I'll have you bastinadoed with broomsticks。 Call up the
wenches with broomsticks。
SIR WIL。 Ahey! Wenches? Where are the wenches?
LADY。 Dear Cousin Witwoud; get him away; and you will bind me to
you inviolably。 I have an affair of moment that invades me with
some precipitation。You will oblige me to all futurity。
WIT。 Come; knight。 Pox on him; I don't know what to say to him。
Will you go to a cock…match?
SIR WIL。 With a wench; Tony? Is she a shake…bag; sirrah? Let me
bite your cheek for that。
WIT。 Horrible! He has a breath like a bagpipe。 Ay; ay; come; will
you march; my Salopian?
SIR WIL。 Lead on; little Tony。 I'll follow thee; my Anthony; my
Tantony。 Sirrah; thou shalt be my Tantony; and I'll be thy pig。
And a fig for your Sultan and Sophy。
LADY。 This will never do。 It will never make a match;at least
before he has been abroad。
SCENE XII。
LADY WISHFORT; WAITWELL disguised as for SIR ROWLAND。
LADY。 Dear Sir Rowland; I am confounded with confusion at the
retrospection of my own rudeness;I have more pardons to ask than
the pope distributes in the year of jubilee。 But I hope where there
is likely to be so near an alliance; we may unbend the severity of
decorum; and dispense with a little ceremony。
WAIT。 My impatience; madam; is the effect of my transport; and till
I have the possession of your adorable person; I am tantalised on
the rack; and do but hang; madam; on the tenter of expectation。
LADY。 You have excess of gallantry; Sir Rowland; and press things
to a conclusion with a most prevailing vehemence。 But a day or two
for decency of marriage …
WAIT。 For decency of funeral; madam! The delay will break my
heartor if that should fail; I shall be poisoned。 My nephew will
get an inkling of my designs and poison meand I would willingly
starve him before I dieI would gladly go out of the world with
that satisfaction。 That would be some comfort to me; if I could but
live so long as to be revenged on that unnatural viper。
LADY。 Is he so unnatural; say you? Truly I would contribute much
both to the saving of your life and the accomplishment of your
revenge。 Not that I respect myself; though he has been a perfidious
wretch to me。
WAIT。 Perfidious to you?
LADY。 O Sir Rowland; the hours that he has died away at my feet;
the tears that he has shed; the oaths that he has sworn; the
palpitations that he has felt; the trances and the tremblings; the
ardours and the ecstasies; the kneelings and the risings; the heart…
heavings and the hand…gripings; the pangs and the pathetic regards
of his protesting eyes!Oh; no memory can register。
WAIT。 What; my rival? Is the rebel my rival? A dies。
LADY。 No; don't kill him at once; Sir Rowland: starve him
gradually; inch by inch。
WAIT。 I'll do't。 In three weeks he shall be barefoot; in a month
out at knees with begging an alms; he shall starve upward and
upward; 'till he has nothing living but his head; and then go out in
a stink like a candle's end upon a save…all。
LADY。 Well; Sir Rowland; you have the way;you are no novice in
the labyrinth of love;you have the clue。 But as I am a person;
Sir Rowland; you must not attribute my yielding to any sinister
appetite or indigestion of widowhood; nor impute my complacency to
any lethargy of continence。 I hope you do not think me prone to any
iteration of nuptials?
WAIT。 Far be it from me …
LADY。 If you do; I protest I must recede; or think that I have made
a prostitution of decorums; but in the vehemence of compassion; and
to save the life of a person of so much importance …
WAIT。 I esteem it so …
LADY。 Or else you wrong my condescension …
WAIT。 I do not; I do not …
LADY。 Indeed you do。
WAIT。 I do not; fair shrine of virtue。
LADY。 If you think the least scruple of causality was an ingredient
…
WAIT。 Dear madam; no。 You are all camphire and frankincense; all
chastity and odour。
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