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50 bab ballads(50篇巴布歌谣)-第11部分

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suppressed it; as you'll clearly understand; For I thought it might be 
awkward if he came and claimed my hand。 

〃In anger at my secret (which I could not tell before); To lacerate poor 
PETER GRAY vindictively you swore; I told you if you used that blunted 
axe you'd rue the day; And so you will; young GILBERT; for I'll marry 
PETER GRAY!〃 

'AND SO SHE DID。 

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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 
E 
LIKENESS。 


I'VE painted SHAKESPEARE all my life … 〃An infant〃 (even then at 
〃play〃!) 〃A boy;〃 with stage…ambition rife; Then 〃Married to ANN 
HATHAWAY。〃 

〃The bard's first ticket night〃 (or 〃ben。〃); His 〃First appearance on the 
stage;〃 His 〃Call before the curtain〃 … then 〃Rejoicings when he came of 
age。〃 

The bard play…writing in his room; The bard a humble lawyer's clerk。 
The bard a lawyer (3) … parson (4) … groom (5) … The bard deer…stealing; 
after dark。 

The bard a tradesman (6) … and a Jew (7) … The bard a botanist (8) … a 
beak (9) … The bard a skilled musician (10) too … A sheriff (11) and a 
surgeon (12) eke! 

Yet critics say (a friendly stock) That; though it's evident I try; Yet 
even I can barely mock The glimmer of his wondrous eye! 

One morning as a work I framed; There passed a person; walking hard: 
〃My gracious goodness;〃 I exclaimed; 〃How very like my dear old bard! 

〃Oh; what a model he would make!〃 I rushed outside … impulsive me! 〃
Forgive the liberty I take; But you're so very〃 … 〃Stop!〃 said he。 

〃You needn't waste your breath or time; … I know what you are going to 
say; … That you're an artist; and that I'm Remarkably like SHAKESPEARE。 
Eh? 

〃You wish that I would sit to you?〃 I clasped him madly round the 
waist; And breathlessly replied; 〃I do!〃 〃All right;〃 said he; 〃but please 
make haste。〃 

I led him by his hallowed sleeve; And worked away at him apace; I 
painted him till dewy eve; … There never was a nobler face! 

〃Oh; sir;〃 I said; 〃a fortune grand Is yours; by dint of merest chance; To 
sport HIS brow at second…hand; To wear HIS cast…off countenance! 

〃To rub HIS eyes whene'er they ache … To wear HIS baldness ere 

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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

His eyeballs glistened in his eyes … I sat and watched and smoked my 
pipe; 〃Bravo!〃 I said; 〃I recognize The phrensy of your prototype!〃 

His scanty hair he wildly tore: 〃That's right;〃 said I; 〃it shows your 
breed。〃 He danced … he stamped … he wildly swore … 〃Bless me; that's very 
fine indeed!〃 

〃Sir;〃 said the grand Shakesperian boy (Continuing to blaze away); 
〃You think my face a source of joy; That shows you know not what you 
say。 

〃Forgive these yells and cellar…flaps: I'm always thrown in some such 
state When on his face well…meaning chaps This wretched man 
congratulate。 

〃For; oh! this face … this pointed chin …This nose …this brow …these 
eyeballs too; Have always been the origin Of all the woes I ever knew! 

〃If to the play my way I find; To see a grand Shakesperian piece; I 
have no rest; no ease of mind Until the author's puppets cease。 

〃Men nudge each other … thus … and say; 'This certainly is 
SHAKESPEARE'S son;' And merry wags (of course in play) Cry 'Author!' 
when the piece is done。 

〃In church the people stare at me; Their soul the sermon never binds; I 
catch them looking round to see; And thoughts of SHAKESPEARE fill 
their minds。 

〃And sculptors; fraught with cunning wile; Who find it difficult to 
crown A bust with BROWN'S insipid smile; Or TOMKINS'S unmannered 
frown; 〃Yet boldly make my face their own; When (oh; presumption!) they 
require To animate a paving…stone With SHAKESPEARE'S intellectual 
fire。 

〃At parties where young ladies gaze; And I attempt to speak my joy; 
'Hush; pray;' some lovely creature says; 'The fond illusion don't destroy!' 

〃Whene'er I speak; my soul is wrung With these or some such 
whisperings: ''Tis pity that a SHAKESPEARE'S tongue Should say such 
un…Shakesperian things!' 

〃I should not thus be criticised Had I a face of common wont: Don't 

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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 
! 


70 



Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

THE story of FREDERICK GOWLER; A mariner of the sea; Who 
quitted his ship; the HOWLER; A…sailing in Caribbee。 For many a day he 
wandered; Till he met in a state of rum CALAMITY POP VON 
PEPPERMINT DROP; The King of Canoodle…Dum。 

That monarch addressed him gaily; 〃Hum! Golly de do to…day? Hum! 
Lily…white Buckra Sailee〃 … (You notice his playful way?) … 〃What dickens 
you doin' here; sar? Why debbil you want to come? Hum! Picaninnee; dere 
isn't no sea In City Canoodle…Dum!〃 

And GOWLER he answered sadly; 〃Oh; mine is a doleful tale! 
They've treated me werry badly In Lunnon; from where I hail。 I'm one of 
the Family Royal … No common Jack Tar you see; I'm WILLIAM THE 
FOURTH; far up in the North; A King in my own countree!〃 

Bang…bang! How the tom…toms thundered! Bang…bang! How they 
thumped this gongs! Bang…bang! How the people wondered! Bang…bang! 
At it hammer and tongs! Alliance with Kings of Europe Is an honour 
Canoodlers seek; Her monarchs don't stop with PEPPERMINT DROP 
Every day in the week! 

FRED told them that he was undone; For his people all went insane; 
And fired the Tower of London; And Grinnidge's Naval Fane。 And some 
of them racked St。 James's; And vented their rage upon The Church of St。 
Paul; the Fishmongers' Hall; And the Angel at Islington。 

CALAMITY POP implored him In his capital to remain Till those 
people of his restored him To power and rank again。 CALAMITY POP he 
made him A Prince of Canoodle…Dum; With a couple of caves; some 
beautiful slaves; And the run of the royal rum。 

Pop gave him his only daughter; HUM PICKETY WIMPLE TIP: 
FRED vowed that if over the water He went; in an English ship; He'd 
make her his Queen; … though truly It is an unusual thing For a Caribbee 
brat who's as black as your hat To be wife of an English King。 

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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

CALAMITY POP most wisely Determined in everything To model his 
Court precisely On that of the English King; And ordered that every lady 
And every lady's lord Should masticate jacky (a kind of tobaccy); And 
scatter its juice abroad。 

They signified wonder roundly At any astounding yarn; By darning 
their dear eyes roundly ('T was all they had to darn)。 They 〃hoisted their 
slacks;〃 adjusting Garments of plantain…leaves With nautical twitches (as 
if they wore breeches; Instead of a dress like EVE'S!) 

They shivered their timbers proudly; At a phantom forelock dragged; 
And called for a hornpipe loudly Whenever amusement flagged。 〃Hum! 
Golly! him POP resemble; Him Britisher sov'reign; hum! CALAMITY 
POP VON PEPPERMINT DROP; De King of Canoodle…Dum!〃 

The mariner's lively 〃Hollo!〃 Enlivened Canoodle's plain (For 
blessings unnumbered follow In Civilization's train)。 But Fortune; who 
loves a bathos; A terrible ending planned; For ADMIRAL D。 
CHICKABIDDY; C。B。; Placed foot on Canoodle land! 

That rebel; he seized KING GOWLER; He threatened his royal brains; 
And put him aboard the HOWLER; And fastened him down with chains。 
The HOWLER she weighed her anchor; With FREDERICK nicely nailed; 
And off to the North with WILLIAM THE FOURTH These horrible 
pirates sailed。 

CALAMITY said (with folly); 〃Hum! nebber want him again … Him 
civilize all of us; golly! CALAMITY suck him brain!〃 The people; 
however; were pained when They saw him aboard his ship; But none of 
them wept for their FREDDY; except HUM PICKETY WIMPLE TIP。 

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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

SOME time ago; in simple verse I sang the story true Of CAPTAIN 
REECE; the MANTELPIECE; And all her happy crew。 

I showed how any captain may Attach his men to him; If he but heeds 
their smallest needs; And studies every whim。 

Now mark how; by Draconic rule And HAUTEUR ill…advised; The 
noblest crew upon the Blue May be demoralized。 

When his ungrateful country placed Kind REECE upon half…pay; 
Without much claim SIR BERKELY came; And took command one day。 

SIR BERKELY was a martinet … A stern unyielding soul … Who ruled 
his ship by dint of whip And horrible black…hole。 

A sailor who was overcome From having freely dined; And chanced to 
reel when at the wheel; He instantly confined! 

And tars who; when an action raged; Appeared alarmed or scared; And 
those below who wished to go; He very seldom spared。 

E'en he who smote his officer For punishment was booked; And 
mutinies upon the seas He rarely overlooked。 

In short; the happy MANTELPIECE; Where all had gone so well; 
Beneath that fool SIR BERKELY'S rule Became a floating hell。 

When first SIR BERKELY came aboard He read a speech to all; And 
told them how he'd made a vow To act on duty's call。 

Then WILLIAM LEE; he up and said (The Captain's coxswain he); 
〃We've heard the speech your honour's made; And werry pleased we be。 

〃We won't pretend; my lad; as how We're glad to lose our REECE; 
Urbane; polite; he suited quite The saucy MANTELPIECE。 

〃But if your honour gives your mind To study all our ways; With dance 
and song we'll jog along As in those happy days。 

〃I like your honour's looks; and feel You're worthy of your sword。 
Your hand; my lad … I'm doosid glad To welcome you aboard!〃 

SIR BERKELY looked amazed; as though He didn't understand。 
〃Don't shake your head;〃 good WILLIAM said; 〃It is an honest hand。 

〃It's grasped a better hand than yourn … Come; gov'nor; I insist!〃 The 

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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense 

〃Down; upstart!〃 said the hardy salt; But BERKELY dodged his aim; 
And made him go in chains below: The seamen murmured 〃Shame!〃 
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