letters to his son, 1746-47-第7部分

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is　a　pedant；　the　philosopher；　a　cynic；　the　soldier；　a　brute；　and　every
man　disagreeable。

I　long　to　hear；　from　my　several　correspondents　at　Leipsig；　of　your
arrival　there；　and　what　impression　you　make　on　them　at　first；　for　I　have
Arguses；　with　an　hundred　eyes　each；　who　will　watch　you　narrowly；　and
relate　to　me　faithfully。　　My　accounts　will　certainly　be　true；　it　depends
upon　you；　entirely；　of　what　kind　they　shall　be。　　Adieu。




LETTER　XVII

LONDON；　October　16；　O。　S。　　1747

DEAR　BOY：　The　art　of　pleasing　is　a　very　necessary　one　to　possess；　but　a
very　difficult　one　to　acquire。　　It　can　hardly　be　reduced　to　rules；　and
your　own　good　sense　and　observation　will　teach　you　more　of　it　than　I　can。
Do　as　you　would　be　done　by；　is　the　surest　method　that　I　know　of　pleasing。
Observe　carefully　what　pleases　you　in　others；　and　probably　the　same　thing
in　you　will　please　others。　　If　you　are　pleased　with　the　complaisance　and
attention　of　others　to　your　humors；　your　tastes；　or　your　weaknesses；
depend　upon　it　the　same　complaisance　and　attention；　on　your　part　to
theirs；　will　equally　please　them。　Take　the　tone　of　the　company　that　you
are　in；　and　do　not　pretend　to　give　it；　be　serious；　gay；　or　even　trifling；
as　you　find　the　present　humor　of　the　company；　this　is　an　attention　due
from　every　individual　to　the　majority。　　Do　not　tell　stories　in　company；
there　is　nothing　more　tedious　and　disagreeable；　if　by　chance　you　know　a
very　short　story；　and　exceedingly　applicable　to　the　present　subject　of
conversation；　tell　it　in　as　few　words　as　possible；　and　even　then；　throw
out　that　you　do　not　love　to　tell　stories；　but　that　the　shortness　of　it
tempted　you。　　Of　all　things；　banish　the　egotism　out　of　your　conversation；
and　never　think　of　entertaining　people　with　your　own　personal　concerns；
or　private；　affairs；　though　they　are　interesting　to　you；　they　are　tedious
and　impertinent　to　everybody　else；　besides　that；　one　cannot　keep　one's
own　private　affairs　too　secret。　　Whatever　you　think　your　own　excellencies
may　be；　do　not　affectedly　display　them　in　company；　nor　labor；　as　many
people　do；　to　give　that　turn　to　the　conversation；　which　may　supply　you
with　an　opportunity　of　exhibiting　them。　　If　they　are　real；　they　will
infallibly　be　discovered；　without　your　pointing　them　out　yourself；　and
with　much　more　advantage。　　Never　maintain　an　argument　with　heat　and
clamor；　though　you　think　or　know　yourself　to　be　in　the　right：　but　give
your　opinion　modestly　and　coolly；　which　is　the　only　way　to　convince；
and；　if　that　does　not　do；　try　to　change　the　conversation；　by　saying；
with　good　humor；　〃We　shall　hardly　convince　one　another；　nor　is　it
necessary　that　we　should；　so　let　us　talk　of　something　else。〃

Remember　that　there　is　a　local　propriety　to　be　observed　in　all　companies；
and　that　what　is　extremely　proper　in　one　company；　may　be；　and　often　is；
highly　improper　in　another。

The　jokes；　the　'bonmots；'　the　little　adventures；　which　may　do　very　well
in　one　company；　will　seem　flat　and　tedious；　when　related　in　another。
The　particular　characters；　the　habits；　the　cant　of　one　company；　may　give
merit　to　a　word；　or　a　gesture；　which　would　have　none　at　all　if　divested
of　those　accidental　circumstances。　　Here　people　very　commonly　err；　and
fond　of　something　that　has　entertained　them　in　one　company；　and　in
certain　circumstances；　repeat　it　with　emphasis　in　another；　where　it　is
either　insipid；　or；　it　may　be；　offensive；　by　being　ill…timed　or
misplaced。　　Nay；　they　often　do　it　with　this　silly　preamble；　〃I　will　tell
you　an　excellent　thing〃；　or；　〃I　will　tell　you　the　best　thing　in　the
world。〃　　This　raises　expectations；　which；　when　absolutely　disappointed；
make　the　relater　of　this　excellent　thing　look；　very　deservedly；　like　a
fool。

If　you　would　particularly　gain　the　affection　and　friendship　of　particular
people；　whether　men　or　women；　endeavor　to　find　out　the　predominant
excellency；　if　they　have　one；　and　their　prevailing　weakness；　which
everybody　has；　and　do　justice　to　the　one；　and　something　more　than　justice
to　the　other。　　Men　have　various　objects　in　which　they　may　excel；　or　at
least　would　be　thought　to　excel；　and；　though　they　love　to　hear　justice
done　to　them；　where　they　know　that　they　excel；　yet　they　are　most　and　best
flattered　upon　those　points　where　they　wish　to　excel；　and　yet　are
doubtful　whether　they　do　or　not。　　As；　for　example；　Cardinal　Richelieu；
who　was　undoubtedly　the　ablest　statesman　of　his　time；　or　perhaps　of　any
other；　had　the　idle　vanity　of　being　thought　the　best　poet　too；　he　envied
the　great　Corneille　his　reputation；　and　ordered　a　criticism　to　be　written
upon　the　〃Cid。〃　　Those；　therefore；　who　flattered　skillfully；　said　little
to　him　of　his　abilities　in　state　affairs；　or　at　least　but　'en　passant；'
and　as　it　might　naturally　occur。　　But　the　incense　which　they　gave　him；
the　smoke　of　which　they　knew　would　turn　his　head　in　their　favor；　was　as　a
'bel　esprit'　and　a　poet。　　Why？　　Because　he　was　sure　of　one　excellency；
and　distrustful　as　to　the　other。　　You　will　easily　discover　every　man's
prevailing　vanity；　by　observing　his　favorite　topic　of　conversation；　for
every　man　talks　most　of　what　he　has　most　a　mind　to　be　thought　to　excel
in。　　Touch　him　but　there；　and　you　touch　him　to　the　quick。　　The　late　Sir
Robert　Walpole　（who　was　certainly　an　able　man）　was　little　open　to
flattery　upon　that　head；　for　he　was　in　no　doubt　himself　about　it；　but　his
prevailing　weakness　was；　to　be　thought　to　have　a　polite　and　happy　turn　to
gallantry；　of　which　he　had　undoubtedly　less　than　any　man　living：　it　was
his　favorite　and　frequent　subject　of　conversation：　which　proved；　to　those
who　had　any　penetration；　that　it　was　his　prevailing　weakness。　　And　they
applied　to　it　with　success。

Women　have；　in　general；　but　one　object；　which　is　their　beauty；　upon
which；　scarce　any　flattery　is　too　gross　for　them　to　swallow。　　Nature　has
hardly　formed　a　woman　ugly　enough　to　be　insensible　to　flattery　upon　her
person；　if　her　face　is　so　shocking；　that　she　must　in　some　degree；　be
conscious　of　it；　her　figure　and　her　air；　she　trusts；　make　ample　amends
for　it。　　If　her　figure　is　deformed；　her　face；　she　thinks；　counterbalances
it。　　If　they　are　both　bad；　she　comforts　herself　that　she　has　graces；　a
certain　manner；　a　'je　ne　sais　quoi；'　still　more　engaging　than　beauty。
This　truth　is　evident；　from　the　studied　and　elaborate　dress　of　the
ugliest　women　in　the　world。　　An　undoubted；；　uncontested；　conscious
beauty；　is　of　all　women；　the　least　sensible　of　flattery　upon　that　head；
she　knows　that　it　is　her　due；　and　is　therefore　obliged　to　nobody　for
giving　it　her。　　She　must　be　flattered　upon　her　understanding；　which；
though　she　may　possibly　not　doubt　of　herself；　yet　she　suspects　that　men
may　distrust。

Do　not　mistake　me；　and　think　that　I　mean　to　recommend　to　you　abject　and
criminal　flattery：　no；　flatter　nobody's　vices　or　crimes：　on　the　contrary；
abhor　and　discourage　them。　　But　there　is　no　living　in　the　world　without　a
complaisant　indulgence　for　people's　weaknesses；　and　innocent；　though
ridiculous　vanities。　　If　a　man　has　a　mind　to　be　thought　wiser；　and　a
woman　handsomer　than　they　really　are；　their　error　is　a　comfortable　one　to
themselves；　and　an　innocent　one　with　regard　to　other　people；　and　I　would
rather　make　them　my　friends；　by　indulging　them　in　it；　than　my　enemies；
by　endeavoring　（and　that　to　no　purpose）　to　undeceive　them。

There　are　little　attentions　likewise；　which　are　infinitely　engaging；
and　which　sensibly　affect　that　degree　of　pride　and　self…love；　which　is
inseparable　from　human　nature；　as　they　are　unquestionable　proofs　of　the
regard　and　consideration　which　we　have　for　the　person　to　whom　we　pay
them。　　As；　for　example；　to　observe　the　little　habits；　the　likings；　the
antipathies；　and　the　tastes　of　those　whom　we　would　gain；　and　then　take
care　to　provide　them　with　the　one；　and　to　secure　them　from　the　other；
giving　them；　genteelly；　to　understand；　that　you　had　observed　that　they
liked　such　a　dish；　or　such　a　room；　for　which　reason　you　had　prepared　it：
or；　on　the　contrary；　that　having　observed　they　had　an　aversion　to　such　a
dish；　a　dislike　to　such　a　person；　etc。；　you　had　taken　care　to　avoid
presenting　them。　　Such　attention　to　such　trifles　flatters　self…love　much
more　than　greater　things；　as　it　makes　people　think　themselves　almost　the
only　objects　of　your　thoughts　and　care。

These　are　some　of　the　arcana　necessary　for　your　initiation　in　the　great
society　of　the　world。　　I　wish　I　had　known　them　better　at　your　age；　I　have
paid　the　price　of　three…and…fifty　years　for　them；　and　shall　not　grudge
it；　if　you　reap　the　advantage。　　Adieu。




LETTER　XVIII

LONDON；　October　30；　O。　S。　　1747

DEAR　BOY：　I　am　very　well　pleased　with　your　'Itinerarium；'　which　you　sent
me　from　Ratisbon。　　It　shows　me　that　you　observe　and　inquire　as　you　go；
which　is　the　true　end　of　traveling。　　Those　who　travel　heedlessly　from
place　to　place；　observing　only　their　distance　from　each　other；　and
attending　only　to　their　accommodation　at　the　inn　at　night；　set　out　fools；
and　will　certainly　return　so。　　Those　who　only　mind　the　raree…shows　of　the
places　which　they　go　through；　such　as　steeples；　clocks；　town…houses；
etc。；　get　so　little　by　their　travels；　that　they　might　as　well　stay　at
home。　　But　those　who　observe；　and　inquire　into　the　situations；　the
strength；　the　weakness；　the　trade；　the　manufactures；　the　government；　and
constitution　of　every　place　they　go　to；　who　frequent　the　best　companies；
and　attend　to　their　several　manners　and　characters；　those　alone　travel
with　advantage；　and　as　they　set　out　wise；　return　wiser。

I　would　advise　you　always　to　get　the　shortest　description　or　history　of
every　place　where　you　make　any　stay；　and　such　a　book；　however　imperfect；
will　still　suggest　to　you　matter　for　inquiry；　upon　which　you　may　get
better　informations　from　the　people　of　the　place。　　For　example；　while　you
are　at　Leipsig；　get　some　short　account　（and　to　be　sure　there　are　many
such）　of　the　present　state　of　the　town；　with　regard　to　its　magistrates；
its　police；　its　privileges；　etc。；　and　then　inform　yourself　more　minutely
upon　all　those　heads　in；　conversation　with　the　most　intelligent　people。
Do　the　same　thing　afterward　with　regard　to　the　Electorate　of　Saxony：　you
will　find　a　short　history　of　it　in　Puff