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the bab ballads-第2部分
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〃My GENERAL JOHN; I swear upon
My oath I think 'tis so … 〃
〃Pish!〃 proudly sneered his GENERAL JOHN;
And he also said 〃Ho! ho!〃
〃My GENERAL JOHN! my GENERAL JOHN!
My GENERAL JOHN!〃 quoth he;
〃This aristocratical sneer upon
Your face I blush to see!
〃No truly great or generous cove
Deserving of them names;
Would sneer at a fixed idea that's drove
In the mind of a PRIVATE JAMES!〃
Said GENERAL JOHN; 〃Upon your claims
No need your breath to waste;
If this is a joke; FULL…PRIVATE JAMES;
It's a joke of doubtful taste。
〃But; being a man of doubtless worth;
If you feel certain quite
That we were probably changed at birth;
I'll venture to say you're right。〃
So GENERAL JOHN as PRIVATE JAMES
Fell in; parade upon;
And PRIVATE JAMES; by change of names;
Was MAJOR…GENERAL JOHN。
Ballad: To A Little Maid … By A Policeman
Come with me; little maid;
Nay; shrink not; thus afraid …
I'll harm thee not!
Fly not; my love; from me …
I have a home for thee …
A fairy grot;
Where mortal eye
Can rarely pry;
There shall thy dwelling be!
List to me; while I tell
The pleasures of that cell;
Oh; little maid!
What though its couch be rude;
Homely the only food
Within its shade?
No thought of care
Can enter there;
No vulgar swain intrude!
Come with me; little maid;
Come to the rocky shade
I love to sing;
Live with us; maiden rare …
Come; for we 〃want〃 thee there;
Thou elfin thing;
To work thy spell;
In some cool cell
In stately Pentonville!
Ballad: John And Freddy
JOHN courted lovely MARY ANN;
So likewise did his brother; FREDDY。
FRED was a very soft young man;
While JOHN; though quick; was most unsteady。
FRED was a graceful kind of youth;
But JOHN was very much the strongest。
〃Oh; dance away;〃 said she; 〃in truth;
I'll marry him who dances longest。〃
JOHN tries the maiden's taste to strike
With gay; grotesque; outrageous dresses;
And dances comically; like
CLODOCHE AND Co。; at the Princess's。
But FREDDY tries another style;
He knows some graceful steps and does 'em …
A breathing Poem … Woman's smile …
A man all poesy and buzzem。
Now FREDDY'S operatic PAS …
Now JOHNNY'S hornpipe seems entrapping:
Now FREDDY'S graceful ENTRECHATS …
Now JOHNNY'S skilful 〃cellar…flapping。〃
For many hours … for many days …
For many weeks performed each brother;
For each was active in his ways;
And neither would give in to t'other。
After a month of this; they say
(The maid was getting bored and moody)
A wandering curate passed that way
And talked a lot of goody…goody。
〃Oh my;〃 said he; with solemn frown;
〃I tremble for each dancing FRATER;
Like unregenerated clown
And harlequin at some the…ayter。〃
He showed that men; in dancing; do
Both impiously and absurdly;
And proved his proposition true;
With Firstly; Secondly; and Thirdly。
For months both JOHN and FREDDY danced;
The curate's protests little heeding;
For months the curate's words enhanced
The sinfulness of their proceeding。
At length they bowed to Nature's rule …
Their steps grew feeble and unsteady;
Till FREDDY fainted on a stool;
And JOHNNY on the top of FREDDY。
〃Decide!〃 quoth they; 〃let him be named;
Who henceforth as his wife may rank you。〃
〃I've changed my views;〃 the maiden said;
〃I only marry curates; thank you!〃
Says FREDDY; 〃Here is goings on!
To bust myself with rage I'm ready。〃
〃I'll be a curate!〃 whispers JOHN …
〃And I;〃 exclaimed poetic FREDDY。
But while they read for it; these chaps;
The curate booked the maiden bonny …
And when she's buried him; perhaps;
She'll marry FREDERICK or JOHNNY。
Ballad: Sir Guy The Crusader
Sir GUY was a doughty crusader;
A muscular knight;
Ever ready to fight;
A very determined invader;
And DICKEY DE LION'S delight。
LENORE was a Saracen maiden;
Brunette; statuesque;
The reverse of grotesque;
Her pa was a bagman from Aden;
Her mother she played in burlesque。
A CORYPHEE; pretty and loyal;
In amber and red
The ballet she led;
Her mother performed at the Royal;
LENORE at the Saracen's Head。
Of face and of figure majestic;
She dazzled the cits …
Ecstaticised pits; …
Her troubles were only domestic;
But drove her half out of her wits。
Her father incessantly lashed her;
On water and bread
She was grudgingly fed;
Whenever her father he thrashed her
Her mother sat down on her head。
GUY saw her; and loved her; with reason;
For beauty so bright
Sent him mad with delight;
He purchased a stall for the season;
And sat in it every night。
His views were exceedingly proper;
He wanted to wed;
So he called at her shed
And saw her progenitor whop her …
Her mother sit down on her head。
〃So pretty;〃 said he; 〃and so trusting!
You brute of a dad;
You unprincipled cad;
Your conduct is really disgusting;
Come; come; now admit it's too bad!
〃You're a turbaned old Turk; and malignant …
Your daughter LENORE
I intensely adore;
And I cannot help feeling indignant;
A fact that I hinted before;
〃To see a fond father employing
A deuce of a knout
For to bang her about;
To a sensitive lover's annoying。〃
Said the bagman; 〃Crusader; get out。〃
Says GUY; 〃Shall a warrior laden
With a big spiky knob;
Sit in peace on his cob
While a beautiful Saracen maiden
Is whipped by a Saracen snob?
〃To London I'll go from my charmer。〃
Which he did; with his loot
(Seven hats and a flute);
And was nabbed for his Sydenham armour
At MR。 BEN…SAMUEL'S suit。
SIR GUY he was lodged in the Compter;
Her pa; in a rage;
Died (don't know his age);
His daughter; she married the prompter;
Grew bulky and quitted the stage。
Ballad: Haunted
Haunted? Ay; in a social way
By a body of ghosts in dread array;
But no conventional spectres they …
Appalling; grim; and tricky:
I quail at mine as I'd never quail
At a fine traditional spectre pale;
With a turnip head and a ghostly wail;
And a splash of blood on the dickey!
Mine are horrible; social ghosts; …
Speeches and women and guests and hosts;
Weddings and morning calls and toasts;
In every bad variety:
Ghosts who hover about the grave
Of all that's manly; free; and brave:
You'll find their names on the architrave
Of that charnel…house; Society。
Black Monday … black as its school…room ink …
With its dismal boys that snivel and think
Of its nauseous messes to eat and drink;
And its frozen tank to wash in。
That was the first that brought me grief;
And made me weep; till I sought relief
In an emblematical handkerchief;
To choke such baby bosh in。
First and worst in the grim array…
Ghosts of ghosts that have gone their way;
Which I wouldn't revive for a single day
For all the wealth of PLUTUS …
Are the horrible ghosts that school…days scared:
If the classical ghost that BRUTUS dared
Was the ghost of his 〃Caesar〃 unprepared;
I'm sure I pity BRUTUS。
I pass to critical seventeen;
The ghost of that terrible wedding scene;
When an elderly Colonel stole my Queen;
And woke my dream of heaven。
No schoolgirl decked in her nurse…room curls
Was my gushing innocent Queen of Pearls;
If she wasn't a girl of a thousand girls;
She was one of forty…seven!
I see the ghost of my first cigar;
Of the thence…arising family jar …
Of my maiden brief (I was at the Bar;
And I called the Judge 〃Your wushup!〃)
Of reckless days and reckless nights;
With wrenched…off knockers; extinguished lights;
Unholy songs and tipsy fights;
Which I strove in vain to hush up。
Ghosts of fraudulent joint…stock banks;
Ghosts of 〃copy; declined with thanks;〃
Of novels returned in endless ranks;
And thousands more; I suffer。
The only line to fitly grace
My humble tomb; when I've run my race;
Is; 〃Reader; this is the resting…place
Of an unsuccessful duffer。〃
I've fought them all; these ghosts of mine;
But the weapons I've used are sighs and brine;
And now that I'm nearly forty…nine;
Old age is my chiefest bogy;
For my hair is thinning away at the crown;
And the silver fights with the worn…out brown;
And a general verdict sets me down
As an irreclaimable fogy。
Ballad: The Bishop And The 'Busman
It was a Bishop bold;
And London was his see;
He was short and stout and round about
And zealous as could be。
It also was a Jew;
Who drove a Putney 'bus …
For flesh of swine however fine
He did not care a cuss。
His name was HASH BAZ BEN;
And JEDEDIAH too;
And SOLOMON and ZABULON …
This 'bus…directing Jew。
The Bishop said; said he;
〃I'll see what I can do
To Christianise and make you wise;
You poor benighted Jew。〃
So every blessed day
That 'bus he rode outside;
From Fulham town; both up and down;
And loudly thus he cried:
〃His name is HASH BAZ BEN;
And JEDEDIAH too;
And SOLOMON and ZABULON …
This 'bus…directing Jew。〃
At first the 'busman smiled;
And rather liked the fun …
He merely smiled; that Hebrew child;
And said; 〃Eccentric one!〃
And gay young dogs would wait
To see the 'bus go by
(These gay young dogs; in striking togs);
To hear the Bishop cry:
〃Observe his grisly beard;
His race it clearly shows;
He sticks no fork in ham or pork …
Observe; my friends; his nose。
〃His name is HASH BAZ BEN;
And JEDEDIAH too;
And SOLOMON and ZABULON …
This 'bus…directing Jew。〃
But though at first amused;
Yet after seven years;
This Hebrew child got rather riled;
And melted into tears。
He really almost feared
To leave his poor abode;
His nose; and name; and beard became
A byword on that road。
At length he swore an oath;
The reaso
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