padre ignacio-第4部分

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〃Absent！〃　Still　lighter；　still　deeper；　was　this　whisper　that　the　Padre

breathed。



〃I　must　find　life；〃　exclaimed　Gaston；　〃and　my　fortune　at　the　mines；　I

hope。　I　am　not　a　bad　fellow；　Father。　You　can　easily　guess　all　the　things

I　do。　I　have　never；　to　my　knowledge；　harmed　any　one。　I　didn't　even　try　to

kill　my　adversary　in　an　affair　of　honor。　I　gave　him　a　mere　flesh…wound；

and　by　this　time　he　must　be　quite　recovered。　He　was　my　friend。　But　as　he

came　between　me〃



Gaston　stopped；　and　the　Padre；　looking　keenly　at　him；　saw　the　violence

that　he　had　noticed　in　church　pass　like　a　flame　over　the　young　man's

handsome　face。



〃That's　nothing　dishonorable；〃　said　Gaston；　answering　the　priest's　look。

And　then；　because　this　look　made　him　not　quite　at　his　ease：　〃Perhaps　a

priest　might　feel　obliged　to　say　it　was　dishonorable。　She　and　her　father

werea　man　owes　no　fidelity　before　he　isbut　you　might　say　that　had

been　dishonorable。〃



〃I　have　not　said　so；　my　son。〃



〃I　did　what　every　gentleman　would　do。〃　insisted　Gaston。



〃And　that　is　often　wrong！〃　said　the　Padre；　gently　and　gravely。　〃But　I'm

not　your　confessor。〃



〃No；〃　said　Gaston；　looking　down。　〃And　it　is　all　over。　It　will　not　begin

again。　Since　leaving　New　Orleans　I　have　traveled　an　innocent　journey

straight　to　you。　And　when　I　make　my　fortune　I　shall　be　in　a　position　to

return　and〃



〃Claim　the　pressed　flowrer？〃　suggested　the　Padre。　He　did　not　smile。



〃Ah；　you　remember　how　those　things　are！〃　said　Gaston：　and　he　laughed　and

blushed。



〃Yes；〃　said　the　Padre；　looking　at　the　anchored　barkentine；　〃I　remember

how　those　things　are。〃



For　a　while　the　vessel　and　its　cargo　and　the　landed　men　and　various

business　and　conversations　occupied　them。　But　the　freight　for　the　mission

once　seen　to；　there　was　not　much　else　to　detain　them。



The　barkentine　was　only　a　coaster　like　many　others　which　had　begun　to

fill　the　sea　a　little　more　of　late　years；　and　presently　host　and　guest

were　riding　homeward。　Side　by　side　they　rode；　companions　to　the　eye；　but

wide　apart　in　mood；　within　the　turbulent　young　figure　of　Gaston　dwelt　a

spirit　that　could　not　be　more　at　ease；　while　revolt　was　steadily　kindling

beneath　the　schooled　and　placid　mask　of　the　Padre。



Yet　still　the　strangeness　of　his　situation　in　such　a　remote；　resourceless

place　came　back　as　a　marvel　into　the　young　man's　lively　mind。　Twenty

years　in　prison；　he　thought；　and　hardly　aware　of　it！　And　he　glanced　at

the　silent　priest。　A　man　so　evidently　fond　of　music；　of　theaters；　of　the

world；　to　whom　pressed　flowers　had　meant　something　onceand　now

contented　to　bleach　upon　these　wastes！　Not　even　desirous　of　a　brief

holiday；　but　finding　an　old　organ　and　some　old　operas　enough　recreation！

〃It　is　his　age；　I　suppose；〃　thought　Gaston。　And　then　the　notion　of

himself　when　he　should　be　sixty　occurred　to　him；　and　he　spoke。



〃Do　you　know；　I　do　not　believe；〃　said　he；　〃that　I　should　ever　reach　such

contentment　as　yours。〃



〃Perhaps　you　will；〃　said　Padre　Ignacio；　in　a　low　voice。



〃Never！〃　declared　the　youth。　〃It　comes　only　to　the　few；　I　am　sure。〃



〃Yes。　Only　to　the　few；〃　murmured　the　Padre。



〃I　am　certain　that　it　must　be　a　great　possession；〃　Gaston　continued；　

〃and　yetand　yetdear　me！　life　is　a　splendid　thing！〃



〃There　are　several　ways　to　live　it；〃　said　the　Padre。



〃Only　one　for　me！〃　cried　Gaston。　〃Action；　men；　women；　thingsto　be　there；

to　be　known；　to　play　a　part；　to　sit　in　the　front　seats；　to　have　people

tell　one　another；　'There　goes　Gaston　Villere！'　and　to　deserve　one's

prominence。　Why；　if　I　was　Padre　of　Santa　Ysabel　del　Mar　for　twenty　years

no！　for　one　yeardo　you　know　what　I　should　have　done？　Some　day　it

would　have　been　too　much　for　me。　I　should　have　left　these　savages　to　a

pastor　nearer　their　own　level；　and　I　should　have　ridden　down　this　canyon

upon　my　mule；　and　stepped　on　board　the　barkentine；　and　gone　back　to　my

proper　sphere。　You　will　understand；　sir；　that　I　am　far　from　venturing　to
make　any　personal　comment。　I　am　only　thinking　what　a　world　of　difference

lies　between　natures　that　can　feel　as　alike　as　we　do　upon　so　many

subjects。　Why；　not　since　leaving　New　Orleans　have　I　met　any　one　with　whom

I　could　talk；　except　of　the　weather　and　the　brute　interests　common　to　us

all。　That　such　a　one　as　you　should　be　here　is　like　a　dream。〃



〃But　it　is　not　a　dream；〃　said　the　Padre。



〃And；　sirpardon　me　if　I　do　say　thisare　you　not　wasted　at　Santa

Ysabel　del　Mar？　I　have　seen　the　priests　at　the　other　missions。　They　are

the　sort　of　good　men　that　I　expected。　But　are　you　needed　to　save　such

souls　as　these？〃



〃There　is　no　aristocracy　of　souls；〃　said　the　Padre；　again　whispering。



〃But　the　body　and　the　mind！〃　cried　Gaston。　〃My　God；　are　they　nothing？　Do

you　think　that　they　are　given　to　us　for　nothing　but　a　trap？　You　cannot

teach　such　a　doctrine　with　your　library　there。　And　how　about　all　the

cultivated　men　and　women　away　from　whose　quickening　society　the　brightest

of　us　grow　numb？　You　have　held　out。　But　will　it　be　for　long？　Are　you

never　to　save　any　souls　of　your　own　kind？　Are　not　twenty　years　of

mesclados　enough？　No；　no！〃　finished　young　Gaston；　hot　with　his　unforeseen

eloquence；　〃I　should　ride　down　some　morning　and　take　the　barkentine。〃



Padre　Ignacio　was　silent　for　a　space。



〃I　have　not　offended　you？〃　asked　the　young　man。



〃No。　Anything　but　that。　You　are　surprised　that　I　shouldchooseto　stay

here。　Perhaps　you　may　have　wondered　how　I　came　to　be　here　at　all？〃



〃I　had　not　intended　any　impertinent〃



〃Oh　no。　Put　such　an　idea　out　of　your　head；　my　son。　You　may　remember　that

I　was　going　to　make　you　a　confession　about　my　operas。　Let　us　sit　down　in

this　shade。〃



So　they　picketed　the　mules　near　the　stream　and　sat　down。







IV



You　have　seen；〃　began　Padre　Ignacio；　〃what　sort　of　a　man　Iwas　once。

Indeed；　it　seems　very　strange　to　myself　that　you　should　have　been　here

not　twenty…four　hours　yet；　and　know　so　much　of　me。　For　there　has　come　no

one　else　at　all〃the　Padre　paused　a　moment　and　mastered　the

unsteadiness　that　he　had　felt　approaching　in　his　voice〃there　has　been

no　one　else　to　whom　I　have　talked　so　freely。　In　my　early　days　I　had　no

thought　of　being　a　priest。　By　parents　destined　me　for　a　diplomatic

career。　There　was　plenty　of　money　andand　all　the　rest　of　it；　for　by

inheritance　came　to　me　the　acquaintance　of　many　people　whose　names　you

would　be　likely　to　have　heard　of。　Cities；　people　of　fashion；　artiststhe

whole　of　it　was　my　element　and　my　choice；　and　by…and…by　I　married；　not

only　where　it　was　desirable；　but　where　I　loved。　Then　for　the　first　time

Death　laid　his　staff　upon　my　enchantment；　and　I　understood　many　things

that　had　been　only　words　to　me　hitherto。　To　have　been　a　husband　for　a

year；　and　a　father　for　a　moment；　and　in　that　moment　to　lose　allthis

unblinded　me。　Looking　back；　it　seemed　to　me　that　I　had　never　done　anything

except　for　myself　all　my　days。　I　left　the　world。　In　due　time　I　became　a

priest　and　lived　in　my　own　country。　But　my　worldly　experience　and　my

secular　education　had　given　to　my　opinions　a　turn　too　liberal　for　the

place　where　my　work　was　laid。　I　was　soon　advised　concerning　this　by　those

in　authority　over　me。　And　since　they　could　not　change　me　and　I　could　them；

yet　wished　to　work　and　to　teach；　the　New　World　was　suggested；　and　I

volunteered　to　give　the　rest　of　my　life　to　missions。　It　was　soon　found

that　some　one　was　needed　here；　and　for　this　little　place　I　sailed；　and　to

these　humble　people　I　have　dedicated　my　service。　They　are　pastoral

creatures　of　the　soil。　Their　vineyard　and　cattle　days　are　apt　to　be　like

the　sun　and　storm　around　themstrong　alike　in　their　evil　and　in　their

good。　All　their　years　they　live　as　childrenchildren　with　men's　passions

given　to　them　like　deadly　weapons；　unable　to　measure　the　harm　their

impulses　may　bring。　Hence；　even　in　their　crimes；　their　hearts　will

generally　open　soon　to　the　one　great　key　of　love；　while　civilization

makes　locks　which　that　key　cannot　always　fit　at　the　first　turn。　And

coming　to　know　this；〃　said　Padre　Ignacio；　fixing　his　eyes　steadily　upon

Gaston；　〃you　will　understand　how　great　a　privilege　it　is　to　help　such

people；　and　how　the　sense　of　something　accomplishedunder　Godshould

bring　Contentment　with　Renunciation。〃



〃Yes；〃　said　Gaston　Villere。　Then；　thinking　of　himself；　〃I　can　understand

it　in　a　man　like　you。〃



〃Do　not　speak　of　me　at　all！〃　exclaimed　the　Padre；　almost　passionately。

〃But　pray　Heaven　that　you　may　find　the　thing　yourself　some　day

Contentment　with　Renunciationand　never　let　it　go。〃



〃Amen！〃　said　Gaston；　strangely　moved。



〃That　is　the　whole　of　my　story；〃　the　priest　continued；　with　no　more　of

the　recent　stress　in　his　voice。　〃And　now　I　have　talked　to　you　about

myself　quite　enough。　But　you　must　have　my　confession。〃　He　had　now　resumed

entirely　his　half…playful　tone。　〃I　was　just　a　little　mistaken；　you　see

too　self…reliant；　perhapswhen　I　supposed；　in　my　first　missionary　ardor；

that　I　could　get　on　without　any　remembrance　of　the　world　at　all。　I　found

that　I　could　not。　And　so　I　have　taught　the　old　operas　to　my　choirsuch

parts　of　them　as　are　within　our　compass　and　suitable　for　worship。　And

certain　of　my　friends　still　alive　at　home　are　good　enough　to　remember　this

taste　of　mine　and　to　send　me　each　year　some　of　the　new　music　that　I　should

never　hear　of　otherwise。　Then　we　study　these　things　also。　And　although

our　organ　is　a　miserable　affair；　Felipe　manages　very　cleverly　to　make　it

do。　And　while　the　voices　are　singing　these　operas；　especially　the　old

ones；　what　harm　is　there　if　sometimes　the　priest　is　thinking　of　something

else？　So　there's　my　confession！　And　now；　whether　Trovatore　is　come　or

not；　I　shall　not　allow　you　to　leave　us　until　you　have　taught　all　you　know

of　it　to　Felipe。〃



The　new　opera；　however；　had　duly　arrived。　And　as　he　turned　its　pages

Padre　Ignacio　was　quick　to　seize　at　once　upon　the　music　that　could　be

taken　i