letters to his son, 1751-第6部分

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hat　I　am　sure　she　can　give　you　whatever　form　she　pleases。　　A　versatility　of　manners　is　as　necessary　in　social；　as　a　versatility　of　parts　is　in　political　life。　　One　must　often　yield；　in　order　to　prevail；　one　must　humble　one's　self；　to　be　exalted；　one　must；　like　St。　　Paul；　become　all　things　to　all　men；　to　gain　some；　and；　by　the　way；　men　are　taken　by　the　same　means；　'mutatis　mutandis'；　that　women　are　gainedby　gentleness；　insinuation；　and　submission：　and　these　lines　of　Mr。　Dryden　will　hold　to　a　minister　as　well　as　to　a　mistress：

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　〃The　prostrate　lover；　when　he　lowest　lies；　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　But　stoops　to　conquer；　and　but　kneels　to　rise。〃

In　the　course　of　the　world；　the　qualifications　of　the　chameleon　are　often　necessary；　nay；　they　must　be　carried　a　little　further；　and　exerted　a　little　sooner；　for　you　should；　to　a　certain　degree；　take　the　hue　of　either　the　man　or　the　woman　that　you　want；　and　wish　to　be　upon　terms　with。　　'A　propos'；　have　you　yet　found　out　at　Paris；　any　friendly　and　hospitable　Madame　de　Lursay；　'qui　veut　bien　se　charger　du　soin　de　vous　eduquer'？　　And　have　you　had　any　occasion　of　representing　to　her；　'qu'elle　faisoit　donc　des　noeuds'？　　But　I　ask　your；　pardon；　Sir；　for　the　abruptness　of　the　question；　and　acknowledge　that　I　am　meddling　with　matters　that　are　out　of　my　department。　　However；　in　matters　of　less　importance；　I　desire　to　be　'de　vos　secrets　le　fidele　depositaire'。　　Trust　me　with　the　general　turn　and　color　of　your　amusements　at　Paris。　　Is　it　'le　fracas　du　grand　monde；　comedies；　bals；　operas；　cour；'　etc。？　　Or　is　it　'des　petites　societes；　moins　bruyantes；　mais　pas　pour　cela　moins　agreables'？　　Where　are　you　the　most　'etabli'？　　Where　are　you　'le　petit　Stanhope？　　Voyez　vous　encore　jour；　a　quelque　arrangement　honnete？　　Have　you　made　many　acquaintances　among　the　young　Frenchmen　who　ride　at　your　Academy；　and　who　are　they？　　Send　to　me　this　sort　of　chit…chat　in　your　letters；　which；　by　the　bye；　I　wish　you　would　honor　me　with　somewhat　oftener。　　If　you　frequent　any　of　the　myriads　of　polite　Englishmen　who　infest　Paris；　who　are　they？　　Have　you　finished　with　Abbe　Nolet；　and　are　you　'au　fait'　of　all　the　properties　and　effects　of　air？。　　Were　I　inclined　to　quibble；　I　would　say；　that　the　effects　of　air；　at　least；　are　best　to　be　learned　of　Marcel。　　If　you　have　quite　done　with　l'Abbes　Nolet；　ask　my　friend　l'Abbe　Sallier　to　recommend　to　you　some　meagre　philomath；　to　teach　you　a　little　geometry　and　astronomy；　not　enough　to　absorb　your　attention　and　puzzle　your　intellects；　but　only　enough　not　to　be　grossly　ignorant　of　either。　　I　have　of　late　been　a　sort　of　'astronome　malgre　moi'；　by　bringing　in　last　Monday　into　the　House　of　Lords　a　bill　for　reforming　our　present　Calendar　and　taking　the　New　Style。　　Upon　which　occasion　I　was　obliged　to　talk　some　astronomical　jargon；　of　which　I　did　not　understand　one　word；　but　got　it　by　heart；　and　spoke　it　by　rote　from　a　master。　I　wished　that　I　had　known　a　little　more　of　it　myself；　and　so　much　I　would　have　you　know。　　But　the　great　and　necessary　knowledge　of　all　is；　to　know；　yourself　and　others：　this　knowledge　requires　great　attention　and　long　experience；　exert　the　former；　and　may　you　have　the　latter！　Adieu！

P。　S。　　I　have　this　moment　received　your　letters　of　the　27th　February；　and　the　2d　March；　N。　S。　　The　seal　shall　be　done　as　soon　as　possible。　　I　am；　glad　that　you　are　employed　in　Lord　Albemarle's　bureau；　it　will　teach　you；　at　least；　the　mechanical　part　of　that　business；　such　as　folding；　entering；　and　docketing　letters；　for　you　must　not　imagine　that　you　are　let　into　the　'fin　fin'　of　the　correspondence；　nor　indeed　is　it　fit　that　you　should；　at；　your　age。　　However；　use　yourself　to　secrecy　as　to　the　letters　you　either　read　or　write；　that　in　time　you　may　be　trusted　with　SECRET；　VERY　SECRET；　SEPARATE；　APART；　etc。　　I　am　sorry　that　this　business　interferes　with　your　riding；　I　hope　it　is　seldom；　but　I　insist　upon　its　not　interfering　with　your　dancing…master；　who　is　at　this　time　the　most　useful　and　necessary　of　all　the　masters　you　have　or　can　have。




LETTER　CXXXIII

MY　DEAR　FRIEND：　I　mentioned　to　you；　some　time　ago　a　sentence　which　I　would　most　earnestly　wish　you　always　to　retain　in　your　thoughts；　and　observe　in　your　conduct。　　It　is　'suaviter　in　modo；　fortiter　in　re'　＇gentleness　of　manners；　with　firmness　of　mind　　D。W。＇。　　I　do　not　know　any　one　rule　so　unexceptionably　useful　and　necessary　in　every　part　of　life。　I　shall　therefore　take　it　for　my　text　to…day；　and　as　old　men　love　preaching；　and　I　have　some　right　to　preach　to　you；　I　here　present　you　with　my　sermon　upon　these　words。　　To　proceed；　then；　regularly　and　PULPITICALLY；　I　will　first　show　you；　my　beloved；　the　necessary　connection　of　the　two　members　of　my　text　'suaviter　in　modo：　fortiter　in　re'。　　In　the　next　place；　I　shall　set　forth　the　advantages　and　utility　resulting　from　a　strict　observance　of　the　precept　contained　in　my　text；　and　conclude　with　an　application　of　the　whole。　　The　'suaviter　in　modo'　alone　would　degenerate　and　sink　into　a　mean；　timid　complaisance　and　passiveness；　if　not　supported　and　dignified　by　the　'fortiter　in　re'；　which　would　also　run　into　impetuosity　and　brutality；　if　not　tempered　and　softened　by　the　'suaviter　in　modo'：　however；　they　are　seldom　united。

The　warm；　choleric　man；　with　strong　animal　spirits；　despises　the　'suaviter　in　modo'；　and　thinks　to；　carry　all　before　him　by　the　'fortiter　in　re'。　　He　may；　possibly；　by　great　accident；　now　and　then　succeed；　when　he　has　only　weak　and　timid　people　to　deal　with；　but　his　general　fate　will　be；　to　shock　offend；　be　hated；　and　fail。　　On　the　other　hand；　the　cunning；　crafty　man　thinks　to　gain　all　his　ends　by　the　'suaviter　in　modo'　only；　HE　BECOMES　ALL　THINGS　TO　ALL　MEN；　he　seems　to　have　no　opinion　of　his　own；　and　servilely　adopts　the　present　opinion　of　the　present　person；　he　insinuates　himself　only　into　the　esteem　of　fools；　but　is　soon　detected；　and　surely　despised　by　everybody　else。　　The　wise　man　（who　differs　as　much　from　the　cunning；　as　from　the　choleric　man）　alone　joins　the　'suaviter　in　modo'　with　the　'fortiter　in　re'。　　Now　to　the　advantages　arising　from　the　strict　observance　of　this　precept：

If　you　are　in　authority；　and　have　a　right　to　command；　your　commands　delivered　'suaviter　in　modo'　will　be　willingly；　cheerfully；　and　consequently　well　obeyed；　whereas；　if　given　only　'fortiter'；　that　is　brutally；　they　will　rather；　as　Tacitus　says；　be　interrupted　than　executed。　　For　my　own　part；　if　I　bid　my　footman　bring　me　a　glass　of　wine；　in　a　rough　insulting　manner；　I　should　expect　that；　in　obeying　me；　he　would　contrive　to　spill　some　of　it　upon　me：　and　I　am　sure　I　should　deserve　it。　　A　cool；　steady　resolution　should　show　that　where　you　have　a　right　to　command　you　will　be　obeyed；　but　at　the　same　time；　a　gentleness　in　the　manner　of　enforcing　that　obedience　should　make　it　a　cheerful　one；　and　soften　as　much　as　possible　the　mortifying　consciousness　of　inferiority。　　If　you　are　to　ask　a　favor；　or　even　to　solicit　your　due；　you　must　do　it　'suaviter　in　modo'；　or　you　will　give　those　who　have　a　mind　to　refuse　you；　either　a　pretense　to　do　it；　by　resenting　the　manner；　but；　on　the　other　hand；　you　must；　by　a　steady　perseverance　and　decent　tenaciousness；　show　the　'fortiter　in　re'。　　The　right　motives　are　seldom　the　true　ones　of　men's　actions；　especially　of　kings；　ministers；　and　people　in　high　stations；　who　often　give　to　importunity　and　fear；　what　they　would　refuse　to　justice　or　to　merit。　　By　the　'suaviter　in　modo'　engage　their　hearts；　if　you　can；　at　least　prevent　the　pretense　of　offense　but　take　care　to　show　enough　of　the　'fortiter　in　re'　to　extort　from　their　love　of　ease；　or　their　fear；　what　you　might　in　vain　hope　for　from　their　justice　or　good…nature。　　People　in　high　life　are　hardened　to　the　wants　and　distresses　of　mankind；　as　surgeons　are　to　their　bodily　pains；　they　see　and　hear　of　them　all　day　long；　and　even　of　so　many　simulated　ones；　that　they　do　not　know　which　are　real；　and　which　not。　　Other　sentiments　are　therefore　to　be　applied　to；　than　those　of　mere　justice　and　humanity；　their　favor　must　be　captivated　by　the　'suaviter　in　modo'；　their　love　of　ease　disturbed　by　unwearied　importunity；　or　their　fears　wrought　upon　by　a　decent　intimation　of　implacable；　cool　resentment；　this　is　the　true　'fortiter　in　re'。　　This　precept　is　the　only　way　I　know　in　the　world　of　being　loved　without　being　despised；　and　feared　without　being　hated。　　It　constitutes　the　dignity　of　character　which　every　wise　man　must　endeavor　to　establish。

Now　to　apply　what　has　been　said；　and　so　conclude。

If　you　find　that　you　have　a　hastiness　in　your　temper；　which　unguardedly　breaks　out　into　indiscreet　sallies；　or　rough　expressions；　to　either　your　superiors；　your　equals；　or　your　inferiors；　watch　it　narrowly；　check　it　carefully；　and　call　the　'suaviter　in　modo'　to　your　assistance：　at　the　first　impulse　of　passion；　be　silent　till　you　can　be　soft。　　Labor　even　to　get　the　command　of　your　countenance　so　well；　that　those　emotions　may　not　be　read　in　it；　a　most　unspeakable　advantage　in　business！　　On　the　other　hand；　let　no　complaisance；　no　gentleness　of　temper；　no　weak　desire　of　pleasing　on　your　part；no　wheedling；　coaxing；　nor　flattery；　on　other　people's；make　you　recede　one　jot　from　any　point　that　reason　and　prudence　have　bid　you　pursue；　but　return　to　the　charge；　persist；　persevere；　and　you　will　find　most　things　attainable　that　are　possible。　A　yielding；　timid　meekness　is　always　abused　and　insulted　by　the　unjust　and　the　unfeeling；；　but　when　sustained　by　the　'fortiter　in　re'；　is　always　respected；　commonly　successful。　　In　your　friendships　and　connections；　as　well　as　in　your　enmities；　this　rule　is　particularly　useful；　let　your　firmness　and　vigor　preserve　and　invite　attachments　to　you；　but；　at　the　same　time；　let　your　manner　hinder　the　enemies　of　your　friends　and　dependents　from　becoming　yours；　let　your　enemies　be　disarmed　by　the　gentleness　of　your　manner；　but　let　them　feel；　at　the　same　time；　the　steadiness　of　your　just　resentment；　for　there　is　a　great　difference　between　bearing　malice；　which　is　always　ungenerous；　and　a　resolute　self…　defense；　which　is　always　prudent　and　justifiable。　　In　negotiations　with　foreign　ministers；　remember　the　'fortiter　in　re'；　give　up　no　point；　accept　of　no　expedient；　till　the　utmost　necessity　reduces　you　to　it；　and　even　then；　dispute　the　ground