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the importance of being earnest-第9部分

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to state that now that I know that you are Mr。 Worthing's ward; I

cannot help expressing a wish you were … well; just a little older

than you seem to be … and not quite so very alluring in appearance。

In fact; if I may speak candidly …



CECILY。  Pray do!  I think that whenever one has anything

unpleasant to say; one should always be quite candid。



GWENDOLEN。  Well; to speak with perfect candour; Cecily; I wish

that you were fully forty…two; and more than usually plain for your

age。  Ernest has a strong upright nature。  He is the very soul of

truth and honour。  Disloyalty would be as impossible to him as

deception。  But even men of the noblest possible moral character

are extremely susceptible to the influence of the physical charms

of others。  Modern; no less than Ancient History; supplies us with

many most painful examples of what I refer to。  If it were not so;

indeed; History would be quite unreadable。



CECILY。  I beg your pardon; Gwendolen; did you say Ernest?



GWENDOLEN。  Yes。



CECILY。  Oh; but it is not Mr。 Ernest Worthing who is my guardian。

It is his brother … his elder brother。



GWENDOLEN。  'Sitting down again。'  Ernest never mentioned to me

that he had a brother。



CECILY。  I am sorry to say they have not been on good terms for a

long time。



GWENDOLEN。  Ah! that accounts for it。  And now that I think of it I

have never heard any man mention his brother。  The subject seems

distasteful to most men。  Cecily; you have lifted a load from my

mind。  I was growing almost anxious。  It would have been terrible

if any cloud had come across a friendship like ours; would it not?

Of course you are quite; quite sure that it is not Mr。 Ernest

Worthing who is your guardian?



CECILY。  Quite sure。  'A pause。'  In fact; I am going to be his。



GWENDOLEN。  'Inquiringly。'  I beg your pardon?



CECILY。  'Rather shy and confidingly。'  Dearest Gwendolen; there is

no reason why I should make a secret of it to you。  Our little

county newspaper is sure to chronicle the fact next week。  Mr。

Ernest Worthing and I are engaged to be married。



GWENDOLEN。  'Quite politely; rising。'  My darling Cecily; I think

there must be some slight error。  Mr。 Ernest Worthing is engaged to

me。  The announcement will appear in the MORNING POST on Saturday

at the latest。



CECILY。  'Very politely; rising。'  I am afraid you must be under

some misconception。  Ernest proposed to me exactly ten minutes ago。

'Shows diary。'



GWENDOLEN。  'Examines diary through her lorgnettte carefully。'  It

is certainly very curious; for he asked me to be his wife yesterday

afternoon at 5。30。  If you would care to verify the incident; pray

do so。  'Produces diary of her own。'  I never travel without my

diary。  One should always have something sensational to read in the

train。  I am so sorry; dear Cecily; if it is any disappointment to

you; but I am afraid I have the prior claim。



CECILY。  It would distress me more than I can tell you; dear

Gwendolen; if it caused you any mental or physical anguish; but I

feel bound to point out that since Ernest proposed to you he

clearly has changed his mind。



GWENDOLEN。  'Meditatively。'  If the poor fellow has been entrapped

into any foolish promise I shall consider it my duty to rescue him

at once; and with a firm hand。



CECILY。  'Thoughtfully and sadly。'  Whatever unfortunate

entanglement my dear boy may have got into; I will never reproach

him with it after we are married。



GWENDOLEN。  Do you allude to me; Miss Cardew; as an entanglement?

You are presumptuous。  On an occasion of this kind it becomes more

than a moral duty to speak one's mind。  It becomes a pleasure。



CECILY。  Do you suggest; Miss Fairfax; that I entrapped Ernest into

an engagement?  How dare you?  This is no time for wearing the

shallow mask of manners。  When I see a spade I call it a spade。



GWENDOLEN。  'Satirically。'  I am glad to say that I have never seen

a spade。  It is obvious that our social spheres have been widely

different。



'Enter MERRIMAN; followed by the footman。  He carries a salver;

table cloth; and plate stand。  CECILY is about to retort。  The

presence of the servants exercises a restraining influence; under

which both girls chafe。'



MERRIMAN。  Shall I lay tea here as usual; Miss?



CECILY。  'Sternly; in a calm voice。'  Yes; as usual。  'MERRIMAN

begins to clear table and lay cloth。  A long pause。  CECILY and

GWENDOLEN glare at each other。'



GWENDOLEN。  Are there many interesting walks in the vicinity; Miss

Cardew?



CECILY。  Oh! yes! a great many。  From the top of one of the hills

quite close one can see five counties。



GWENDOLEN。  Five counties!  I don't think I should like that; I

hate crowds。



CECILY。  'Sweetly。'  I suppose that is why you live in town?

'GWENDOLEN bites her lip; and beats her foot nervously with her

parasol。'



GWENDOLEN。  'Looking round。'  Quite a well…kept garden this is;

Miss Cardew。



CECILY。  So glad you like it; Miss Fairfax。



GWENDOLEN。  I had no idea there were any flowers in the country。



CECILY。  Oh; flowers are as common here; Miss Fairfax; as people

are in London。



GWENDOLEN。  Personally I cannot understand how anybody manages to

exist in the country; if anybody who is anybody does。  The country

always bores me to death。



CECILY。  Ah!  This is what the newspapers call agricultural

depression; is it not?  I believe the aristocracy are suffering

very much from it just at present。  It is almost an epidemic

amongst them; I have been told。  May I offer you some tea; Miss

Fairfax?



GWENDOLEN。  'With elaborate politeness。'  Thank you。  'Aside。'

Detestable girl!  But I require tea!



CECILY。  'Sweetly。'  Sugar?



GWENDOLEN。  'Superciliously。'  No; thank you。  Sugar is not

fashionable any more。 'CECILY looks angrily at her; takes up the

tongs and puts four lumps of sugar into the cup。'



CECILY。  'Severely。'  Cake or bread and butter?



GWENDOLEN。  'In a bored manner。'  Bread and butter; please。  Cake

is rarely seen at the best houses nowadays。



CECILY。  'Cuts a very large slice of cake; and puts it on the

tray。'  Hand that to Miss Fairfax。



'MERRIMAN does so; and goes out with footman。  GWENDOLEN drinks the

tea and makes a grimace。 Puts down cup at once; reaches out her

hand to the bread and butter; looks at it; and finds it is cake。

Rises in indignation。'



GWENDOLEN。  You have filled my tea with lumps of sugar; and though

I asked most distinctly for bread and butter; you have given me

cake。  I am known for the gentleness of my disposition; and the

extraordinary sweetness of my nature; but I warn you; Miss Cardew;

you may go too far。



CECILY。  'Rising。'  To save my poor; innocent; trusting boy from

the machinations of any other girl there are no lengths to which I

would not go。



GWENDOLEN。  From the moment I saw you I distrusted you。  I felt

that you were false and deceitful。  I am never deceived in such

matters。  My first impressions of people are invariably right。



CECILY。  It seems to me; Miss Fairfax; that I am trespassing on

your valuable time。  No doubt you have many other calls of a

similar character to make in the neighbourhood。



'Enter JACK。'



GWENDOLEN。  'Catching sight of him。'  Ernest!  My own Ernest!



JACK。  Gwendolen!  Darling!  'Offers to kiss her。'



GWENDOLEN。  'Draws back。'  A moment!  May I ask if you are engaged

to be married to this young lady?  'Points to CECILY。'



JACK。  'Laughing。'  To dear little Cecily!  Of course not!  What

could have put such an idea into your pretty little head?



GWENDOLEN。  Thank you。  You may!  'Offers her cheek。'



CECILY。  'Very sweetly。'  I knew there must be some

misunderstanding; Miss Fairfax。  The gentleman whose arm is at

present round your waist is my guardian; Mr。 John Worthing。



GWENDOLEN。  I beg your pardon?



CECILY。  This is Uncle Jack。



GWENDOLEN。  'Receding。'  Jack!  Oh!



'Enter ALGERNON。'



CECILY。  Here is Ernest。



ALGERNON。  'Goes straight over to CECILY without noticing any one

else。'  My own love!  'Offers to kiss her。'



CECILY。  'Drawing back。'  A moment; Ernest!  May I ask you … are

you engaged to be married to this young lady?



ALGERNON。  'Looking round。'  To what young lady?  Good heavens!

Gwendolen!



CECILY。  Yes! to good heavens; Gwendolen; I mean to Gwendolen。



ALGERNON。  'Laughing。'  Of course not!  What could have put such an

idea into your pretty little head?



CECILY。  Thank you。  'Presenting her cheek to be kissed。'  You may。

'ALGERNON kisses her。'



GWENDOLEN。  I felt there was some slight error; Miss Cardew。  The

gentleman who is now embracing you is my cousin; Mr。 Algernon

Moncrieff。



CECILY。  'Breaking away from ALGERNON。'  Algernon Moncrieff!  Oh!

'The two girls move towards each other and put their arms round

each other's waists protection。'



CECILY。  Are you called Algernon?



ALGERNON。  I cannot deny it。



CECILY。  Oh!



GWENDOLEN。  Is your name really John?



JACK。  'Standing rather proudly。'  I could deny it if I liked。  I

could deny anything if I liked。  But my name certainly is John。  It

has been John for years。



CECILY。  'To GWENDOLEN。'  A gross deception has been practised on

both of us。



GWENDOLEN。  My poor wounded Cecily!



CECILY。  My sweet wronged Gwendolen!



GWENDOLEN。  'Slowly and seriously。'  You will call me sister; will

you not?  'They embrace。  JACK and ALGERNON groan and walk up and

down。'



CECILY。  'Rather brightly。'  There is just one question I would

like to be allowed to ask my guardian。



GWENDOLEN。  An admirable idea!  Mr。 Worthing; there is just one

question I would like to be permitted to put to you。  Where is your

brother Ernest?  We are both engaged to be married to your brother

Ernest; so it is a matter of some imp
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