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the kite runner-第98部分
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g all around me。 That was fun。
You must miss your parents very much; I said。 I wondered if he d seen the Taliban drag his parents out into the street。 I hoped he hadn t。
Do you miss your parents? he aked; resting his cheek on his knees; looking up at me。
Do I miss my parents? Well; I never met my mother。 My father died a few years ago; and; yes; I do miss him。 Sometimes a lot。
Do you remember what he looked like?
I thought of Baba s thick neck; his black eyes; his unruly brown hair。 Sitting on his lap had been like sitting on a pair of tree trunks。 I remember what he looked like; I said。 What he smelled like too。
I m starting to forget their faces; Sohrab said。 Is that bad?
No; I said。 Time does that。 I thought of something。 I looked in the front pocket of my coat。 Found the Polaroid snap shot of Hassan and Sohrab。 Here; I said。
He brought the photo to within an inch of his face; turned it so the light from the mosque fell on it。 He looked at it for a long time。 I thought he might cry; but he didn t。 He just held it in both hands; traced his thumb over its surface。 I thought of a line I d read somewhere; or maybe I d heard someone say it: There are a lot of children in Afghanistan; but little childhood。 He stretched his hand to give it back to me。
Keep it; I said。 It s yours。
Thank you。 He looked at the photo again and stowed it in the pocket of his vest。 A horse…drawn cart clip…clopped by in the parking lot。 Little bells dangled from the horse s neck and jingled with each step。
I ve been thinking a lot about mosques lately; Sohrab said。
You have? What about them?
He shrugged。 Just thinking about them。 He lifted his face; looked straight at me。 Now he was crying; softly; silently。 Can I ask you something; Amir agha?
Of course。
Will God。。。 he began; and choked a little。 Will God put me in hell for what I did to that man?
I reached for him and he flinched。 I pulled back。 Nay。 Of course not; I said。 I wanted to pull him close; hold him; tell him the world had been unkind to him; not the other way around。
His face twisted and strained to stay posed。 Father used to say it s wrong to hurt even bad people。 Because they don t know any better; and because bad people sometimes bee good。
Not always; Sohrab。
He looked at me questioningly。
The man who hurt you; I knew him from many years ago; I said。 I guess you figured that out that from the conversation he and I had。 He。。。 he tried to hurt me once when I was your age; but your father saved me。 Your father was very brave and he was always rescuing me from trouble; standing up for me。 So one day the bad man hurt your father instead。 He hurt him in a very bad way; and I。。。 I couldn t save your father the way he had saved me。
Why did people want to hurt my father? Sohrab said in a wheezy little voice。 He was never mean to anyone。
You re right。 Your father was a good man。 But that s what I m trying to tell you; Sohrab jan。 That there are bad people in this world; and sometimes bad people stay bad。 Sometimes you have to stand up to them。 What you did to that man is what I should have done to him all those years ago。 You gave him what he deserved; and he deserved even more。
Do you think Father is disappointed in me?
I know he s not; I said。 You saved my life in Kabul。 I know he is very proud of you for that。
He wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt。 It burst a bubble of spittle that had formed on his lips。 He buried his face in his hands and wept a long time before he spoke again。 I miss Father; and Mother too; he croaked。 And I miss Sasa and Rahim Khan sahib。 But sometimes I m glad they re not 。。。 they re not here anymore。
Why? I touched his arm。 He drew back。
Because…… he said; gasping and hitching between sobs; because I don t want them to see me。。。 I m so dirty。 He sucked in his breath and let it out in a long; wheezy cry。 I m so dirty and full of sin。
You re not dirty; Sohrab; I said。
Those men……
You re not dirty at all。
……they did things。。。 the bad man and the other two。。。 they did things。。。 did things to me。
You re not dirty; and you re not full of sin。 I touched his arm again and he drew away。 I reached again; gently; and pulled him to me。 I won t hurt you; I whispered。 I promise。 He resisted a lit tle。 Slackened。 He let me draw him to me and rested his head on my chest。 His little body convulsed in my arms with each sob。
A kinship exists between people who ve fed from the same breast。 Now; as the boy s pain soaked through my shirt; I saw that a kinship had taken root between us too。 What had happened in that room with Assef had irrevocably bound us。
I d been looking for the right time; the right moment; to ask the question that had been buzzing around in my head and keep ing me up at night。 I decided the moment was now; right here; right now; with the bright lights of the house of God shining on us。
Would you like to e live in America with me and my wife?
He didn t answer。 He sobbed into my shirt and I let him。
FOR A WEEK; neither one of us mentioned what I had asked him; as if the question hadn t b
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