the water-babies-第16部分

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t　and　twiddled　his　whiskers；　as　much　as　to　say；　〃You　couldn't　do　that。〃

Tom　asked　him　about　water…babies。　　〃Yes；〃　he　said。　　He　had　seen　them　often。　　But　he　did　not　think　much　of　them。　　They　were　meddlesome　little　creatures；　that　went　about　helping　fish　and　shells　which　got　into　scrapes。　　Well；　for　his　part；　he　should　be　ashamed　to　be　helped　by　little　soft　creatures　that　had　not　even　a　shell　on　their　backs。　　He　had　lived　quite　long　enough　in　the　world　to　take　care　of　himself。

He　was　a　conceited　fellow；　the　old　lobster；　and　not　very　civil　to　Tom；　and　you　will　hear　how　he　had　to　alter　his　mind　before　he　was　done；　as　conceited　people　generally　have。　　But　he　was　so　funny；　and　Tom　so　lonely；　that　he　could　not　quarrel　with　him；　and　they　used　to　sit　in　holes　in　the　rocks；　and　chat　for　hours。

And　about　this　time　there　happened　to　Tom　a　very　strange　and　important　adventure　…　so　important；　indeed；　that　he　was　very　near　never　finding　the　water…babies　at　all；　and　I　am　sure　you　would　have　been　sorry　for　that。

I　hope　that　you　have　not　forgotten　the　little　white　lady　all　this　while。　　At　least；　here　she　comes；　looking　like　a　clean　white　good　little　darling；　as　she　always　was；　and　always　will　be。　　For　it　befell　in　the　pleasant　short　December　days；　when　the　wind　always　blows　from　the　south…west；　till　Old　Father　Christmas　comes　and　spreads　the　great　white　table…cloth；　ready　for　little　boys　and　girls　to　give　the　birds　their　Christmas　dinner　of　crumbs　…　it　befell　（to　go　on）　in　the　pleasant　December　days；　that　Sir　John　was　so　busy　hunting　that　nobody　at　home　could　get　a　word　out　of　him。　Four　days　a　week　he　hunted；　and　very　good　sport　he　had；　and　the　other　two　he　went　to　the　bench　and　the　board　of　guardians；　and　very　good　justice　he　did；　and；　when　he　got　home　in　time；　he　dined　at　five；　for　he　hated　this　absurd　new　fashion　of　dining　at　eight　in　the　hunting　season；　which　forces　a　man　to　make　interest　with　the　footman　for　cold　beef　and　beer　as　soon　as　he　comes　in；　and　so　spoil　his　appetite；　and　then　sleep　in　an　arm…chair　in　his　bedroom；　all　stiff　and　tired；　for　two　or　three　hours　before　he　can　get　his　dinner　like　a　gentleman。　　And　do　you　be　like　Sir　John；　my　dear　little　man；　when　you　are　your　own　master；　and；　if　you　want　either　to　read　hard　or　ride　hard；　stick　to　the　good　old　Cambridge　hours　of　breakfast　at　eight　and　dinner　at　five；　by　which　you　may　get　two　days'　work　out　of　one。　　But；　of　course；　if　you　find　a　fox　at　three　in　the　afternoon　and　run　him　till　dark；　and　leave　off　twenty　miles　from　home；　why　you　must　wait　for　your　dinner　till　you　can　get　it；　as　better　men　than　you　have　done。　　Only　see　that；　if　you　go　hungry；　your　horse　does　not；　but　give　him　his　warm　gruel　and　beer；　and　take　him　gently　home；　remembering　that　good　horses　don't　grow　on　the　hedge　like　blackberries。

It　befell　（to　go　on　a　second　time）　that　Sir　John；　hunting　all　day；　and　dining　at　five；　fell　asleep　every　evening；　and　snored　so　terribly　that　all　the　windows　in　Harthover　shook；　and　the　soot　fell　down　the　chimneys。　　Whereon　My　Lady；　being　no　more　able　to　get　conversation　out　of　him　than　a　song　out　of　a　dead　nightingale；　determined　to　go　off　and　leave　him；　and　the　doctor；　and　Captain　Swinger　the　agent；　to　snore　in　concert　every　evening　to　their　hearts'　content。　　So　she　started　for　the　seaside　with　all　the　children；　in　order　to　put　herself　and　them　into　condition　by　mild　applications　of　iodine。　　She　might　as　well　have　stayed　at　home　and　used　Parry's　liquid　horse…blister；　for　there　was　plenty　of　it　in　the　stables；　and　then　she　would　have　saved　her　money；　and　saved　the　chance；　also；　of　making　all　the　children　ill　instead　of　well　（as　hundreds　are　made）；　by　taking　them　to　some　nasty　smelling　undrained　lodging；　and　then　wondering　how　they　caught　scarlatina　and　diphtheria：　　but　people　won't　be　wise　enough　to　understand　that　till　they　are　dead　of　bad　smells；　and　then　it　will　be　too　late；　besides　you　see；　Sir　John　did　certainly　snore　very　loud。

But　where　she　went　to　nobody　must　know；　for　fear　young　ladies　should　begin　to　fancy　that　there　are　water…babies　there！　and　so　hunt　and　howk　after　them　（besides　raising　the　price　of　lodgings）；　and　keep　them　in　aquariums；　as　the　ladies　at　Pompeii　（as　you　may　see　by　the　paintings）　used　to　keep　Cupids　in　cages。　　But　nobody　ever　heard　that　they　starved　the　Cupids；　or　let　them　die　of　dirt　and　neglect；　as　English　young　ladies　do　by　the　poor　sea…beasts。　　So　nobody　must　know　where　My　Lady　went。　　Letting　water…babies　die　is　as　bad　as　taking　singing　birds'　eggs；　for；　though　there　are　thousands；　ay；　millions；　of　both　of　them　in　the　world；　yet　there　is　not　one　too　many。

Now　it　befell　that；　on　the　very　shore；　and　over　the　very　rocks；　where　Tom　was　sitting　with　his　friend　the　lobster；　there　walked　one　day　the　little　white　lady；　Ellie　herself；　and　with　her　a　very　wise　man　indeed　…　Professor　Ptthmllnsprts。

His　mother　was　a　Dutchwoman；　and　therefore　he　was　born　at　Curacao　（of　course　you　have　learnt　your　geography；　and　therefore　know　why）；　and　his　father　a　Pole；　and　therefore　he　was　brought　up　at　Petropaulowski　（of　course　you　have　learnt　your　modern　politics；　and　therefore　know　why）：　　but　for　all　that　he　was　as　thorough　an　Englishman　as　ever　coveted　his　neighbour's　goods。　　And　his　name；　as　I　said；　was　Professor　Ptthmllnsprts；　which　is　a　very　ancient　and　noble　Polish　name。

He　was；　as　I　said；　a　very　great　naturalist；　and　chief　professor　of　Necrobioneopalaeonthydrochthonanthropopithekology　in　the　new　university　which　the　king　of　the　Cannibal　Islands　had　founded；　and；　being　a　member　of　the　Acclimatisation　Society；　he　had　come　here　to　collect　all　the　nasty　things　which　he　could　find　on　the　coast　of　England；　and　turn　them　loose　round　the　Cannibal　Islands；　because　they　had　not　nasty　things　enough　there　to　eat　what　they　left。

But　he　was　a　very　worthy　kind　good…natured　little　old　gentleman；　and　very　fond　of　children　（for　he　was　not　the　least　a　cannibal　himself）；　and　very　good　to　all　the　world　as　long　as　it　was　good　to　him。　　Only　one　fault　he　had；　which　cock…robins　have　likewise；　as　you　may　see　if　you　look　out　of　the　nursery　window　…　that；　when　any　one　else　found　a　curious　worm；　he　would　hop　round　them；　and　peck　them；　and　set　up　his　tail；　and　bristle　up　his　feathers；　just　as　a　cock…robin　would；　and　declare　that　he　found　the　worm　first；　and　that　it　was　his　worm；　and；　if　not；　that　then　it　was　not　a　worm　at　all。

He　had　met　Sir　John　at　Scarborough；　or　Fleetwood；　or　somewhere　or　other　（if　you　don't　care　where；　nobody　else　does）；　and　had　made　acquaintance　with　him；　and　become　very　fond　of　his　children。　　Now；　Sir　John　knew　nothing　about　sea…cockyolybirds；　and　cared　less；　provided　the　fishmonger　sent　him　good　fish　for　dinner；　and　My　Lady　knew　as　little：　　but　she　thought　it　proper　that　the　children　should　know　something。　　For　in　the　stupid　old　times；　you　must　understand；　children　were　taught　to　know　one　thing；　and　to　know　it　well；　but　in　these　enlightened　new　times　they　are　taught　to　know　a　little　about　everything；　and　to　know　it　all　ill；　which　is　a　great　deal　pleasanter　and　easier；　and　therefore　quite　right。

So　Ellie　and　he　were　walking　on　the　rocks；　and　he　was　showing　her　about　one　in　ten　thousand　of　all　the　beautiful　and　curious　things　which　are　to　be　seen　there。　　But　little　Ellie　was　not　satisfied　with　them　at　all。　　She　liked　much　better　to　play　with　live　children；　or　even　with　dolls；　which　she　could　pretend　were　alive；　and　at　last　she　said　honestly；　〃I　don't　care　about　all　these　things；　because　they　can't　play　with　me；　or　talk　to　me。　　If　there　were　little　children　now　in　the　water；　as　there　used　to　be；　and　I　could　see　them；　I　should　like　that。〃

〃Children　in　the　water；　you　strange　little　duck？〃　said　the　professor。

〃Yes；〃　said　Ellie。　　〃I　know　there　used　to　be　children　in　the　water；　and　mermaids　too；　and　mermen。　　I　saw　them　all　in　a　picture　at　home；　of　a　beautiful　lady　sailing　in　a　car　drawn　by　dolphins；　and　babies　flying　round　her；　and　one　sitting　in　her　lap；　and　the　mermaids　swimming　and　playing；　and　the　mermen　trumpeting　on　conch…shells；　and　it　is　called　'The　Triumph　of　Galatea；'　and　there　is　a　burning　mountain　in　the　picture　behind。　　It　hangs　on　the　great　staircase；　and　I　have　looked　at　it　ever　since　I　was　a　baby；　and　dreamt　about　it　a　hundred　times；　and　it　is　so　beautiful；　that　it　must　be　true。〃

But　the　professor　had　not　the　least　notion　of　allowing　that　things　were　true；　merely　because　people　thought　them　beautiful。　　For　at　that　rate；　he　said；　the　Baltas　would　be　quite　right　in　thinking　it　a　fine　thing　to　eat　their　grandpapas；　because　they　thought　it　an　ugly　thing　to　put　them　underground。　　The　professor；　indeed；　went　further；　and　held　that　no　man　was　forced　to　believe　anything　to　be　true；　but　what　he　could　see；　hear；　taste；　or　handle。

He　held　very　strange　theories　about　a　good　many　things。　　He　had　even　got　up　once　at　the　British　Association；　and　declared　that　apes　had　hippopotamus　majors　in　their　brains　just　as　men　have。　　Which　was　a　shocking　thing　to　say；　for；　if　it　were　so；　what　would　become　of　the　faith；　hope；　and　charity　of　immortal　millions？　　You　may　think　that　there　are　other　more　important　differences　between　you　and　an　ape；　such　as　being　able　to　speak；　and　make　machines；　and　know　right　from　wrong；　and　say　your　prayers；　and　other　little　matters　of　that　kind；　but　that　is　a　child's　fancy；　my　dear。　Nothing　is　to　be　depended　on　but　the　great　hippopotamus　test。　　If　you　have　a　hippopotamus　major　in　your　brain；　you　are　no　ape；　though　you　had　four　hands；　no　feet；　and　were　more　apish　than　the　apes　of　all　aperies。　　But　if　a　hippopotamus　major　is　ever　discovered　in　one　single　ape's　brain；　nothing　will　save　your　great…great…great…great…　great…great…great…great…great…great…great…greater…greatest…　grandmother　from　having　been　an　ape　too。　　No；　my　dear　little　man；　always　remember　that　the　one　true；　certain；　final；　and　all…　important　difference　between　you　and　an　ape　is；　that　you　have　a　hippopotamus　major　in　your　brain；　and　it　has　none；　and　that；　therefore；　to　discover　one　in　its　brain　will　be　a　very　wrong　and　dangerous　thing；　at　which　every　one　will　be　very　much　shocked；　as　we　may　suppose　they　were　at　the　professor。　…　Though　really；　after　all；　it　don't　much　matter；　because　…　as　Lord　Dundreary　and　others　would　put　it　…　nobody　but　men　have　hippopotamuses　in　thei