the patrician-第37部分

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Good…bye；　Mrs。　Noel；　the　world　is　meant　for　the　strong；　isn't　it！〃

She　intended　that　to　hurt　him；　and　from　the　tone　of　his　voice；　she
knew　it　had。

〃Don't；　Lady　Barbara；　from　your　mother；　yes；　not　from　you！〃

〃It's　what　I　believe。　　Good…bye！〃　And　she　went　out。

She　had　told　him　that　she　did　not　want　him　to　gonot　yet；　and　he　was
going！

But　no　sooner　had　she　got　outside；　after　that　strange　outburst；　than
she　bit　her　lips　to　keep　back　an　angry；　miserable　feeling。　　He　had
been　rude　to　her；　she　had　been　rude　to　him；　that　was　the　way　they　had
said　good…bye！　　Then；　as　she　emerged　into　the　sunlight；　she　thought：
〃Oh！　well；　he　doesn't　care；　and　I'm　sure　I　don't！〃

She　heard　a　voice　behind　her。

〃May　I　get　you　a　cab？〃　and　at　once　the　sore　feeling　began　to　die
away；　but　she　did　not　look　round；　only　smiled；　and　shook　her　head；
and　made　a　little　room　for　him　on　the　pavement。

But　though　they　walked；　they　did　not　at　first　talk。　　There　was　rising
within　Barbara　a　tantalizing　devil　of　desire　to　know　the　feelings
that　really　lay　behind　that　deferential　gravity；　to　make　him　show　her
how　much　he　really　cared。　　She　kept　her　eyes　demurely　lowered；　but
she　let　the　glimmer　of　a　smile　flicker　about　her　lips；　she　knew　too
that　her　cheeks　were　glowing；　and　for　that　she　was　not　sorry。　　Was
she　not　to　have　anyanywas　he　calmly　to　go　awaywithout　And
she　thought：　〃He　shall　say　something！　　He　shall　show　me；　without　that
horrible　irony　of　his！〃

She　said　suddenly：

〃Those　two　are　just　waitingsomething　will　happen！〃

〃It　is　probable；〃　was　his　grave　answer。

She　looked　at　him　thenit　pleased　her　to　see　him　quiver　as　if　that
glance　had　gone　right　into　him；　and　she　said　softly：

〃And　I　think　they　will　be　quite　right。〃

She　knew　those　were　reckless　words；　nor　cared　very　much　what　they
meant；　but　she　knew　the　revolt　in　them　would　move　him。　　She　saw　from
his　face　that　it　had；　and　after　a　little　pause；　said：

〃Happiness　is　the　great　thing；〃　and　with　soft；　wicked　slowness：
〃Isn't　it；　Mr。　Courtier？〃

But　all　the　cheeriness　had　gone　out　of　his　face；　which　had　grown
almost　pale。　　He　lifted　his　hand；　and　let　it　drop。　　Then　she　felt
sorry。　　It　was　just　as　if　he　had　asked　her　to　spare　him。

〃As　to　that；〃　he　said：　〃The　rough；　unfortunately；　has　to　be　taken
with　the　smooth。　　But　life's　frightfully　jolly　sometimes。〃

〃As　now？〃

He　looked　at　her　with　firm　gravity；　and　answered

〃As　now。〃

A　sense　of　utter　mortification　seized　on　Barbara。　　He　was　too　strong
for　herhe　was　quixotiche　was　hateful！　　And；　determined　not　to
show　a　sign；　to　be　at　least　as　strong　as　he；　she　said　calmly：

〃Now　I　think　I'll　have　that　cab！〃


When　she　was　in　the　cab；　and　he　was　standing　with　his　hat　lifted；　she
looked　at　him　in　the　way　that　women　can；　so　that　he　did　not　realize
that　she　had　looked。




CHAPTER　XIII

When　Miltoun　came　to　thank　her；　Audrey　Noel　was　waiting　in　the　middle
of　the　room；　dressed　in　white；　her　lips　smiling；　her　dark　eyes
smiling；　still　as　a　flower　on　a　windless　day。

In　that　first　look　passing　between　them；　they　forgot　everything　but
happiness。　　Swallows；　on　the　first　day　of　summer；　in　their　discovery
of　the　bland　air；　can　neither　remember　that　cold　winds　blow；　nor
imagine　the　death　of　sunlight　on　their　feathers；　and；　flitting　hour
after　hour　over　the　golden　fields；　seem　no　longer　birds；　but　just　the
breathing　of　a　new　seasonswallows　were　no　more　forgetful　of
misfortune　than　were　those　two。　　His　gaze　was　as　still　as　her　very
self；　her　look　at　him　had　in　at　the　quietude　of　all　emotion。

When　they'　sat　down　to　talk　it　was　as　if　they　had　gone　back　to　those
days　at　Monkland；　when　he　had　come　to　her　so　often　to　discuss
everything　in　heaven　and　earth。　　And　yet；　over　that　tranquil　eager
drinkingin　of　each　other's　presence；　hovered　a　sort　of　awe。　　It　was
the　mood　of　morning　before　the　sun　has　soared。　　The　dew…grey　cobwebs
enwrapped　the　flowers　of　their　heartsyet　every　prisoned　flower
could　be　seen。　　And　he　and　she　seemed　looking　through　that　web　at　the
colour　and　the　deep…down　forms　enshrouded　so　jealously；　each　feared
too　much　to　unveil　the　other's　heart。　　They　were　like　lovers　who；
rambling　in　a　shy　wood；　never　dare　stay　their　babbling　talk　of　the
trees　and　birds　and　lost　bluebells；　lest　in　the　deep　waters　of　a　kiss
their　star　of　all　that　is　to　come　should　fall　and　be　drowned。　　To
each　hour　its　familiarand　the　spirit　of　that　hour　was　the　spirit　of
the　white　flowers　in　the　bowl　on　the　window…sill　above　her　head。

They　spoke　of　Monk…land；　and　Miltoun's　illness；　of　his　first　speech；
his　impressions　of　the　House　of　Commons；　of　music；　Barbara；　Courtier；
the　river。　　He　told　her　of　his　health；　and　described　his　days　down　by
the　sea。　　She；　as　ever；　spoke　little　of　herself；　persuaded　that　it
could　not　interest　even　him；　but　she　described　a　visit　to　the　opera；
and　how　she　had　found　a　picture　in　the　National　Gallery　which
reminded　her　of　him。　　To　all　these　trivial　things　and　countless
others；　the　tone　of　their　voicessoft；　almost　murmuring；　with　a　sort
of　delighted　gentlenessgave　a　high；　sweet　importance；　a　halo　that
neither　for　the　world　would　have　dislodged　from　where　it　hovered。

It　was　past　six　when　he　got　up　to　go；　and　there　had　not　been　a　moment
to　break　the　calm　of　that　sacred　feeling　in　both　their　hearts。　　They
parted　with　another　tranquil　look；　which　seemed　to　say：　'It　is　well
with　uswe　have　drunk　of　happiness。'

And　in　this　same　amazing　calm　Miltoun　remained　after　he　had　gone
away；　till　about　half…past　nine　in　the　evening；　he　started　forth；　to
walk　down　to　the　House。　　It　was　now　that　sort　of　warm；　clear　night；
which　in　the　country　has　firefly　magic；　and　even　over　the　Town
spreads　a　dark　glamour。　　And　for　Miltoun；　in　the　delight　of　his　new
health　and　well…being；　with　every　sense　alive　and　clean；　to　walk
through　the　warmth　and　beauty　of　this　night　was　sheer　pleasure。　　He
passed　by　way　of　St。　James's　Park；　treading　down　the　purple　shadows
of　plane…tree　leaves　into　the　pools　of　lamplight；　almost　with
remorseso　beautiful；　and　as　if　alive；　were　they。　　There　were　moths
abroad；　and　gnats；　born　on　the　water；　and　scent　of　new…mown　grass
drifted　up　from　the　lawns。　　His　heart　felt　light　as　a　swallow　he　had
seen　that　morning；　swooping　at　a　grey　feather；　carrying　it　along；
letting　it　flutter　away；　then　diving　to　seize　it　again。　　Such　was　his
elation；　this　beautiful　night！　　Nearing　the　House　of　Commons；　he
thought　he　would　walk　a　little　longer；　and　turned　westward　to　the
river：　On　that　warm　evening　the　water；　without　movement　at　turn　of
tide；　was　like　the　black；　snake…smooth　hair　of　Nature　streaming　out
on　her　couch　of　Earth；　waiting　for　the　caress　of　a　divine　hand。　　Far
away　on　the　further；　bank　throbbed　some　huge　machine；　not　stilled　as
yet。　　A　few　stars　were　out　in　the　dark　sky；　but　no　moon　to　invest
with　pallor　the　gleam　of　the　lamps。　　Scarcely　anyone　passed。　　Miltoun
strolled　along　the　river　wall；　then　crossed；　and　came　back　in　front
of　the　Mansions　where　she　lived。　　By　the　railing　he　stood　still。　　In
the　sitting…room　of　her　little　flat　there　was　no　light；　but　the
casement　window　was　wide　open；　and　the　crown　of　white　flowers　in　the
bowl　on　the　window…sill　still　gleamed　out　in　the　darkness　like　a
crescent　moon　lying　on　its　face。　　Suddenly；　he　saw　two　pale　hands
riseone　on　either　side　of　that　bowl；　lift　it；　and　draw　it　in。　　And
he　quivered；　as　though　they　had　touched　him。　　Again　those　two　hands
came　floating　up；　they　were　parted　now　by　darkness；　the　moon　of
flowers　was　gone；　in　its　place　had　been　set　handfuls　of　purple　or
crimson　blossoms。　　And　a　puff　of　warm　air　rising　quickly　out　of　the
night　drifted　their　scent　of　cloves　into　his　face；　so　that　he　held
his　breath　for　fear　of　calling　out　her　name。

Again　the　hands　had　vanishedthrough　the　open　window　there　was
nothing　to　be　seen　but　darkness；　and　such　a　rush　of　longing　seized　on
Miltoun　as　stole　from　him　all　power　of　movement。　　He　could　hear　her
playing；　now。　　The　murmurous　current　of　that　melody　was　like　the
night　itself；　sighing；　throbbing；　languorously　soft。　　It　seemed　that
in　this　music　she　was　calling　him；　telling　him　that　she；　too；　was
longing；　her　heart；　too；　empty。　　It　died　away；　and　at　the　window　her
white　figure　appeared。　　From　that　vision　he　could　not；　nor　did　he　try
to　shrink；　but　moved　out　into　the；　lamplight。　　And　he　saw　her
suddenly　stretch　out　her　hands　to　him；　and　withdraw　them　to　her
breast。　　Then　all　save　the　madness　of　his　longing　deserted　Miltoun。
He　ran　down　the　little　garden；　across　the　hall；　up　the　stairs。

The　door　was　open。　　He　passed　through。　　There；　in　the　sitting…room；
where　the　red　flowers　in　the　window　scented　all　the　air；　it　was　dark；
and　he　could　not　at　first　see　her；　till　against　the　piano　he　caught
the　glimmer　of　her　white　dress。　　She　was　sitting　with　hands　resting
on　the　pale　notes。　　And　falling　on　his　knees；　he　buried　his　face
against　her。　　Then；　without　looking　up；　he　raised　his　hands。　　Her
tears　fell　on　them　covering　her　heart；　that　throbbed　as　if　the
passionate　night　itself　were　breathing　in　there；　and　all　but　the
night　and　her　love　had　stolen　forth。





CHAPTER　XIV

On　a　spur　of　the　Sussex　Downs；　inland　from　Nettle…Cold；　there　stands
a　beech…grove。　　The　traveller　who　enters　it　out　of　the　heat　and
brightness；　takes　off　the　shoes　of　his　spirit　before　its；　sanctity；
and；　reaching　the　centre；　across　the　clean　beech…mat；　he　sits
refreshing　his　brow　with　air；　and　silence。　　For　the　flowers　of
sunlight　on　the　ground　under　those　branches　are　pale　and　rare；　no
insects　hum；　the　birds　are　almost　mute。　　And　close　to　the　border
trees　are　the　quiet；　milk…white　sheep；　in　congregation；　escaping　from
noon　heat。　　Here；　above　fields　and　dwellings；　above　the　ceaseless
network　of　men's　doings；　and　the　vapour　of　their　talk；　the　traveller
feels　solemnity。　　All　seems　conveying　divinitythe　great　white
clouds　moving　their　wings　above　him；　the　faint　longing　murmur　of　the
boughs；　and　in　far　distance；　the　sea。。。。　　And　for　a　space　his
restlessness　and　fear　know　the　peace　of　God。

So　it　was　with　Miltoun　when　he　reached　this　temple；　three　days　after
that　passionate　night；　having　walked　for　hours；　alone　and　full　of
conflict。　　During　those　three　days　he　h