the glimpses of the moon-第43部分

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dry　atmosphere　of　the　office　the　act　of　giving　the　address　of

the　flat　would　restore　some　kind　of　reality　to　the　phantasmal

transaction。　　And　with　wonder　he　watched　the　lawyer；　as　a　matter

of　course；　pencil　the　street　and　the　number　on　one　of　the　papers

enclosed　in　a　folder　on　which　his　own　name　was　elaborately

engrossed。



As　he　took　leave　it　occurred　to　him　to　ask　where　Susy　was

living。　　At　least　he　imagined　that　it　had　just　occurred　to　him；

and　that　he　was　making　the　enquiry　merely　as　a　measure　of

precaution；　in　order　to　know　what　quarter　of　Paris　to　avoid；　but

in　reality　the　question　had　been　on　his　lips　since　he　had　first

entered　the　office；　and　lurking　in　his　mind　since　he　had　emerged

from　the　railway　station　that　morning。　　The　fact　of　not　knowing

where　she　lived　made　the　whole　of　Paris　a　meaningless

unintelligible　place；　as　useless　to　him　as　the　face　of　a　huge

clock　that　has　lost　its　hour　hand。



The　address　in　Passy　surprised　him：　　he　had　imagined　that　she

would　be　somewhere　in　the　neighborhood　of　the　Champs　Elysees　or

the　Place　de　l'Etoile。　　But　probably　either　Mrs。　Melrose　or

Ellie　Vanderlyn　had　taken　a　house　at　Passy。　　Wellit　was

something　of　a　relief　to　know　that　she　was　so　far　off。　　No

business　called　him　to　that　almost　suburban　region　beyond　the

Trocadero；　and　there　was　much　less　chance　of　meeting　her　than　if

she　had　been　in　the　centre　of　Paris。



All　day　he　wandered；　avoiding　the　fashionable　quarters；　the

streets　in　which　private　motors　glittered　five　deep；　and　furred

and　feathered　silhouettes　glided　from　them　into　tea…rooms；

picture…galleries　and　jewellers'　shops。　　In　some　such　scenes

Susy　was　no　doubt　figuring：　　slenderer；　finer；　vivider；　than　the

other　images　of　clay；　but　imitating　their　gestures；　chattering

their　jargon；　winding　her　hand　among　the　same　pearls　and　sables。

He　struck　away　across　the　Seine；　along　the　quays　to　the　Cite；

the　net…work　of　old　Paris；　the　great　grey　vaults　of　St。

Eustache；　the　swarming　streets　of　the　Marais。　　He　gazed　at

monuments　dawdled　before　shop…windows；　sat　in　squares　and　on

quays；　watching　people　bargain；　argue；　philander；　quarrel；　work…

girls　stroll　past　in　linked　bands；　beggars　whine　on　the　bridges；

derelicts　doze　in　the　pale　winter　sun；　mothers　in　mourning

hasten　by　taking　children　to　school；　and　street…walkers　beat

their　weary　rounds　before　the　cafes。



The　day　drifted　on。　　Toward　evening　he　began　to　grow　afraid　of

his　solitude；　and　to　think　of　dining　at　the　Nouveau　Luxe；　or

some　other　fashionable　restaurant　where　he　would　be　fairly　sure

to　meet　acquaintances；　and　be　carried　off　to　a　theatre；　a　boite

or　a　dancing…hall。　　Anything；　anything　now；　to　get　away　from　the

maddening　round　of　his　thoughts。　　He　felt　the　same　blank　fear　of

solitude　as　months　ago　in　Genoa　。。。。　　Even　if　he　were　to　run

across　Susy　and　Altringham；　what　of　it？　　Better　get　the　job

over。　　People　had　long　since　ceased　to　take　on　tragedy　airs

about　divorce：　　dividing　couples　dined　together　to　the　last；　and

met　afterward　in　each　other's　houses；　happy　in　the　consciousness

that　their　respective　remarriages　had　provided　two　new　centres

of　entertainment。　　Yet　most　of　the　couples　who　took　their　re…

matings　so　philosophically　had　doubtless　had　their　hour　of

enchantment；　of　belief　in　the　immortality　of　loving；　whereas　he

and　Susy　had　simply　and　frankly　entered　into　a　business　contract

for　their　mutual　advantage。　　The　fact　gave　the　last　touch　of

incongruity　to　his　agonies　and　exaltations；　and　made　him　appear

to　himself　as　grotesque　and　superannuated　as　the　hero　of　a

romantic　novel。



He　stood　up　from　a　bench　on　which　he　had　been　lounging　in　the

Luxembourg　gardens；　and　hailed　a　taxi。　　Dusk　had　fallen；　and　he

meant　to　go　back　to　his　hotel；　take　a　rest；　and　then　go　out　to

dine。　　But　instead；　he　threw　Susy's　address　to　the　driver；　and

settled　down　in　the　cab；　resting　both　hands　on　the　knob　of　his

umbrella　and　staring　straight　ahead　of　him　as　if　he　were

accomplishing　some　tiresome　duty　that　had　to　be　got　through　with

before　he　could　turn　his　mind　to　more　important　things。



〃It's　the　easiest　way；〃　he　heard　himself　say。



At　the　street…cornerher　street…cornerhe　stopped　the　cab；　and

stood　motionless　while　it　rattled　away。　　It　was　a　short　vague

street；　much　farther　off　than　he　had　expected；　and　fading　away

at　the　farther　end　in　a　dusky　blur　of　hoardings　overhung　by

trees。　　A　thin　rain　was　beginning　to　fall；　and　it　was　already

night　in　this　inadequately　lit　suburban　quarter。　　Lansing　walked

down　the　empty　street。　　The　houses　stood　a　few　yards　apart；　with

bare…twigged　shrubs　between；　and　gates　and　railings　dividing

them　from　the　pavement。　　He　could　not；　at　first；　distinguish

their　numbers；　but　presently；　coming　abreast　of　a　street…lamp；

he　discovered　that　the　small　shabby　facade　it　illuminated　was

precisely　the　one　he　sought。　　The　discovery　surprised　him。　　He

had　imagined　that；　as　frequently　happened　in　the　outlying

quarters　of　Passy　and　La　Muette；　the　mean　street　would　lead　to　a

stately　private　hotel；　built　upon　some　bowery　fragment　of　an　old

country…place。　　It　was　the　latest　whim　of　the　wealthy　to

establish　themselves　on　these　outskirts　of　Paris；　where　there

was　still　space　for　verdure；　and　he　had　pictured　Susy　behind

some　pillared　house…front；　with　lights　pouring　across　glossy

turf　to　sculptured　gateposts。　　Instead；　he　saw　a　six…windowed

house；　huddled　among　neighbours　of　its　kind；　with　the　family

wash　fluttering　between　meagre　bushes。　　The　arc…light　beat

ironically　on　its　front；　which　had　the　worn　look　of　a　tired

work…woman's　face；　and　Lansing；　as　he　leaned　against　the

opposite　railing；　vainly　tried　to　fit　his　vision　of　Susy　into　so

humble　a　setting。



The　probable　explanation　was　that　his　lawyer　had　given　him　the

wrong　address；　not　only　the　wrong　number　but　the　wrong　street。

He　pulled　out　the　slip　of　paper；　and　was　crossing　over　to

decipher　it　under　the　lamp；　when　an　errand…boy　appeared　out　of

the　obscurity；　and　approached　the　house。　　Nick　drew　back；　and

the　boy；　unlatching　the　gate；　ran　up　the　steps　and　gave　the　bell

a　pull。



Almost　immediately　the　door　opened；　and　there　stood　Susy；　the

light　full　upon　her；　and　upon　a　red…checked　child　against　her

shoulder。　　The　space　behind　them　was　dark；　or　so　dimly　lit　that

it　formed　a　black　background　to　her　vivid　figure。　　She　looked　at

the　errand…boy　without　surprise；　took　his　parcel；　and　after　he

had　turned　away；　lingered　a　moment　in　the　door；　glancing　down

the　empty　street。



That　moment；　to　her　watcher；　seemed　quicker　than　a　flash　yet　as

long　as　a　life…time。　　There　she　was；　a　stone's　throw　away；　but

utterly　unconscious　of　his　presence：　　his　Susy；　the　old　Susy；

and　yet　a　new　Susy；　curiously　transformed；　transfigured　almost；

by　the　new　attitude　in　which　he　beheld　her。



In　the　first　shock　of　the　vision　he　forgot　his　surprise　at　her

being　in　such　a　place；　forgot　to　wonder　whose　house　she　was　in；

or　whose　was　the　sleepy　child　in　her　arms。　　For　an　instant　she

stood　out　from　the　blackness　behind　her；　and　through　the　veil　of

the　winter　night；　a　thing　apart；　an　unconditioned　vision；　the

eternal　image　of　the　woman　and　the　child；　and　in　that　instant

everything　within　him　was　changed　and　renewed。　　His　eyes　were

still　absorbing　her；　finding　again　the　familiar　curves　of　her

light　body；　noting　the　thinness　of　the　lifted　arm　that　upheld

the　little　boy；　the　droop　of　the　shoulder　he　weighed　on；　the

brooding　way　in　which　her　cheek　leaned　to　his　even　while　she

looked　away；　then　she　drew　back；　the　door　closed；　and　the

street…lamp　again　shone　on　blankness。



〃But　she's　mine！〃　　Nick　cried；　in　a　fierce　triumph　of

recovery　。。。



His　eyes　were　so　full　of　her　that　he　shut　them　to　hold　in　the

crowding　vision。



It　remained　with　him；　at　first；　as　a　complete　picture；　then

gradually　it　broke　up　into　its　component　parts；　the　child

vanished；　the　strange　house　vanished；　and　Susy　alone　stood

before　him；　his　own　Susy；　only　his　Susy；　yet　changed；　worn；

temperedolder；　evenwith　sharper　shadows　under　the　cheek…

bones；　the　brows　drawn；　the　joint　of　the　slim　wrist　more

prominent。　　It　was　not　thus　that　his　memory　had　evoked　her；　and

he　recalled；　with　a　remorseful　pang；　the　fact　that　something　in

her　look；　her　dress；　her　tired　and　drooping　attitude；　suggested

poverty；　dependence；　seemed　to　make　her　after　all　a　part　of　the

shabby　house　in　which；　at　first　sight；　her　presence　had　seemed

so　incongruous。



〃But　she　looks　poor！〃　he　thought；　his　heart　tightening。　　And

instantly　it　occurred　to　him　that　these　must　be　the　Fulmer

children　whom　she　was　living　with　while　their　parents　travelled

in　Italy。　　Rumours　of　Nat　Fulmer's　sudden　ascension　had　reached

him；　and　he　had　heard　that　the　couple　had　lately　been　seen　in

Naples　and　Palermo。　　No　one　had　mentioned　Susy's　name　in

connection　with　them；　and　he　could　hardly　tell　why　he　had

arrived　at　this　conclusion；　except　perhaps　because　it　seemed

natural　that；　if　Susy　were　in　trouble；　she　should　turn　to　her

old　friend　Grace。



But　why　in　trouble？　　What　trouble？　　What　could　have　happened　to

check　her　triumphant　career？



〃That's　what　I　mean　to　find　out！〃　he　exclaimed。



His　heart　was　beating　with　a　tumult　of　new　hopes　and　old

memories。　　The　sight　of　his　wife；　so　remote　in　mien　and　manner

from　the　world　in　which　he　had　imagined　her　to　be　re…absorbed；

changed　in　a　flash　his　own　relation　to　life；　and　flung　a　mist　of

unreality　over　all　that　he　had　been　trying　to　think　most　solid

and　tangible。　　Nothing　now　was　substantial　to　him　but　the　stones

of　the　street　in　which　he　stood；　the　front　of　the　house　which

hid　her；　the　bell…handle　he　already　felt　in　his　grasp。　　He

started　forward；　and　was　halfway　to　the　threshold　when　a　private

motor　turned　the　corner；　the　twin　glitter　of　its　lamps　carpeting

the　wet　street　with　gold　to　Susy's　door。



Lansing　drew　back　into　the　shadow　as　the　motor　swept