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when the world shook-第6部分
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in the shape of Woman the Inevitable。 Probably it was so decreed
since is it not written that no man can live to himself alone; or
lose himself in watching and nurturing the growth of his own
soul?
It happened thus。 I went to Rome on my way home from India; and
stayed there a while。 On the day after my arrival I wrote my name
in the book of our Minister to Italy at that time; Sir Alfred
Upton; not because I wished him to ask me to dinner; but for the
reason that I had heard of him as a man of archeological tastes
and thought that he might enable me to see things which otherwise
I should not see。
As it chanced he knew about me through some of my Devonshire
neighbours who were friends of his; and did ask me to dinner on
the following night。 I accepted and found myself one of a
considerable party; some of them distinguished English people who
wore Orders; as is customary when one dines with the
representative of our Sovereign。 Seeing these; and this shows
that in the best of us vanity is only latent; for the first time
in my life I was sorry that I had none and was only plain Mr。
Arbuthnot who; as Sir Alfred explained to me politely; must go in
to dinner last; because all the rest had titles; and without even
a lady as there was not one to spare。
Nor was my lot bettered when I got there; as I found myself
seated between an Italian countess and a Russian prince; neither
of whom could talk English; while; alas; I knew no foreign
language; not even French in which they addressed me; seeming
surprised that I did not understand them。 I was humiliated at my
own ignorance; although in fact I was not ignorant; only my
education had been classical。 Indeed I was a good classic and had
kept up my knowledge more or less; especially since I became an
idle man。 In my confusion it occurred to me that the Italian
countess might know Latin from which her own language was
derived; and addressed her in that tongue。 She stared; and Sir
Alfred; who was not far off and overheard me (he also knew
Latin); burst into laughter and proceeded to explain the joke in
a loud voice; first in French and then in English; to the
assembled company; who all became infected with merriment and
also stared at me as a curiosity。
Then it was that for the first time I saw Natalie; for owing to
a mistake of my driver I had arrived rather late and had not been
introduced to her。 As her father's only daughter; her mother
being dead; she was seated at the end of the table behind a
fan…like arrangement of white Madonna lilies; and she had bent
forward and; like the others; was looking at me; but in such a
fashion that her head from that distance seemed as though it were
surrounded and crowned with lilies。 Indeed the greatest art could
not have produced a more beautiful effect which was; however;
really one of naked accident。
An angel looking down upon earth through the lilies of
Heaventhat was the rather absurd thought which flashed into my
mind。 I did not quite realise her face at first except that it
seemed to be both dark and fair; as a fact her waving hair which
grew rather low upon her forehead; was dark; and her large; soft
eyes were grey。 I did not know; and to this moment I do not know
if she was really beautiful; but certainly the light that shone
through those eyes of hers and seemed to be reflected upon her
delicate features; was beauty itself。 It was like that glowing
through a thin vase of the purest alabaster within which a lamp
is placed; and I felt this effect to arise from no chance; like
that of the lily…setting; but; as it were; from the lamp of the
spirit within。
Our eyes met; and I suppose that she saw the wonder and
admiration in mine。 At any rate her amused smile faded; leaving
the face rather serious; though still sweetly serious; and a
tinge of colour crept over it as the first hue of dawn creeps
into a pearly sky。 Then she withdrew herself behind the screen of
lilies and for the rest of that dinner which I thought was never
coming to an end; practically I saw her no more。 Only I noted as
she passed out that although not tall; she was rounded and
graceful in shape and that her hands were peculiarly delicate。
Afterwards in the drawing…room her father; with whom I had
talked at the table; introduced me to her; saying:
〃My daughter is the real archaeologist; Mr。 Arbuthnot; and I
think if you ask her; she may be able to help you。〃
Then he bustled away to speak to some of his important guests;
from whom I think he was seeking political information。
〃My father exaggerates;〃 she said in a soft and very
sympathetic voice; 〃but perhaps〃and she motioned me to a seat
at her side。
Then we talked of the places and things that I more
particularly desired to see and; well; the end of it was that I
went back to my hotel in love with Natalie; and as she afterwards
confessed; she went to bed in love with me。
It was a curious business; more like meeting a very old friend
from whom one had been separated by circumstances for a score of
years or so than anything else。 We were; so to speak; intimate
from the first; we knew all about each other; although here and
there was something new; something different which we could not
remember; lines of thought; veins of memory which we did not
possess in common。 On one point I am absolutely clear: it was not
solely the everyday and ancient appeal of woman to man and man to
woman which drew us together; though doubtless this had its part
in our attachment as under our human conditions it must do;
seeing that it is Nature's bait to ensure the continuance of the
race。 It was something more; something quite beyond that
elementary impulse。
At any rate we loved; and one evening in the shelter of the
solemn walls of the great Coliseum at Rome; which at that hour
were shut to all except ourselves; we confessed our love。 I
really think we must have chosen the spot by tacit but mutual
consent because we felt it to be fitting。 It was so old; so
impregnated with every human experience; from the direst crime of
the tyrant who thought himself a god; to the sublimest sacrifice
of the martyr who already was half a god; with every vice and
virtue also which lies between these extremes; that it seemed to
be the most fitting altar whereon to offer our hearts and all
that caused them to beat; each to the other。
So Natalie and I were betrothed within a month of our first
meeting。 Within three we were married; for what was there to
prevent or delay? Naturally Sir Alfred was delighted; seeing that
he possessed but small private resources and I was able to make
ample provision for his daughter who had hitherto shown herself
somewhat difficult in this business of matrimony and now was
bordering on her twenty…seventh year。 Everybody was delighted;
everything went smoothly as a sledge sliding down a slope of
frozen snow and the mists of time hid whatever might be at the
end of that slope。 Probably a plain; at the worst the upward rise
of ordinary life。
That is what we thought; if we thought at all。 Certainly we
never dreamed of a precipice。 Why should we; who were young; by
comparison; quite healthy and very rich? Who thinks of precipices
under such circumstances; when disaster seems to be eliminated
and death is yet a long way off?
And yet we ought to have done so; because we should have known
that smooth surfaces without impediment to the runners often end
in something of the kind。
I am bound to say that when we returned home to Fulcombe; where
of course we met with a great reception; including the ringing
(out of tune) of the new peal of bells that I had given to the
church; Bastin made haste to point this out。
〃Your wife seems a very nice and beautiful lady; Arbuthnot;〃 he
reflected aloud after dinner; when Mrs。 Bastin; glowering as
usual; though what at I do not know; had been escorted from the
room by Natalie; 〃and really; when I come to think of it; you are
an unusually fortunate person。 You possess a great deal of money;
much more than you have any right to; which you seem to have done
very little to earn and do not spend quite as I should like you
to do; and this nice property; that ought to be owned by a great
number of people; as; according to the views you express; I
should have thought you would acknowledge; and everything else
that a man can want。 It is very strange that you should be so
favoured and not because of any particular merits of your own
which one can see。 However; I have no doubt it will all come even
in the end and you will get your share of troubles; like others。
Perhaps Mrs。 Arbuthnot will have no children as there is so much
for them to take。 Or perhaps you will lose all your money and
have to work for your living; which might be good for you。 Or;〃
he added; still thinking aloud after his fashion; 〃perhaps she
will die youngshe has that kind of face; although; of course; I
hope she won't;〃 he added; waking up。
I do not know why; but his wandering words struck me cold; the
proverbial funeral bell at the marriage feast was nothing to
them。 I suppose it was because in a flash of intuition I knew
that they would come true and that he was an appointed Cassandra。
Perhaps this uncanny knowledge overcame my natural indignation at
such super…gaucherie of which no one but Bastin could have been
capable; and even prevented me from replying at all; so that I
merely sat still and looked at him。
But Bickley did reply with some vigour。
〃Forgive me for saying so; Bastin;〃 he said; bristling all over
as it were; 〃but your remarks; which may or may not be in
accordance with the principles of your religion; seem to me to be
in singularly bad taste。 They would have turned the stomachs of a
gathering of early Christians; who appear to have been the worst
mannered people in the world; and at any
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