the kentons-第21部分

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〃Not　half；〃　said　Lottie。

〃Oh；　do　finish　the　half　with　me！〃

Lottie　instantly　rose；　and　flung　her　sister　the　wrap　she　had　been　holding
ready　to　shed　from　the　moment　the　young　man　had　come　up。　　〃Keep　that　for
me；　Nell。　　Are　you　good　at　catching？〃　　she　asked　him。

〃Catching？〃

〃Yes！　　People；〃　she　explained；　and　at　a　sudden　twist　of　the　ship　she　made
a　clutch　at　his　shoulder。

〃Oh！　　I　think　I　can　catch　you。〃

As　they　moved　off　together；　Boyne　said；　〃Well；　upon　my　word！〃　but　Ellen
did　not　say　anything　in　comment　on　Lottie。　　After　a　while　she　asked；　〃Who
were　the　ladies　that　Mr。　Breckon　met？〃

〃I　didn't　hear　their　names。　　They　were　somebody　he　hadn't　seen　before
since　the　ship　started。　　They　looked　like　a　young　lady　and　her　mother。

It　made　Lottie　mad　when　he　stopped　to　speak　with　them；　and　she　wouldn't
wait　till　he　could　get　through。　　Ran　right　away；　and　made　me　come；　too。〃





XIII。

Breckon　had　not　seen　the　former　interest　between　himself　and　Ellen　lapse
to　commonplace　acquaintance　without　due　sense　of　loss。　　He　suffered
justly；　but　he　did　not　suffer　passively；　or　without　several　attempts　to
regain　the　higher　ground。　　In　spite　of　these　he　was　aware　of　being
distinctly　kept　to　the　level　which　he　accused　himself　of　having　chosen；
by　a　gentle　acquiescence　in　his　choice　more　fatal　than　snubbing。　　The
advances　that　he　made　across　the　table；　while　he　still　met　Miss　Kenton
alone　there；　did　not　carry　beyond　the　rack　supporting　her　plate。　　She
talked　on　whatever　subject　he　started　with　that　angelic　sincerity　which
now　seemed　so　far　from　him；　but　she　started　none　herself；　she　did　not
appeal　to　him　for　his　opinion　upon　any　question　more　psychological　than
the　barometer；　and；

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　〃In　a　tumultuous　privacy　of　storm；〃

he　found　himself　as　much　estranged　from　her　as　if　a　fair…weather　crowd
had　surrounded　them。　　He　did　not　believe　that　she　resented　the　levity　he
had　shown；　but　he　had　reason　to　fear　that　she　had　finally　accepted　it　as
his　normal　mood；　and　in　her　efforts　to　meet　him　in　it；　as　if　he　had　no
other；　he　read　a　tolerance　that　was　worse　than　contempt。　　When　he　tried
to　make　her　think　differently；　if　that　was　what　she　thought　of　him；　he
fancied　her　rising　to　the　notion　he　wished　to　give　her；　and　then
shrinking　from　it；　as　if　it　must　bring　her　the　disappointment　of　some
trivial　joke。

It　was　what　he　had　taught　her　to　expect　of　him；　and　he　had　himself　to
blame。　　Now　that　he　had　thrown　that　precious　chance　away；　he　might　well
have　overvalued　it。　　She　had　certain　provincialisms　which　he　could　not
ignore。　　She　did　not　know　the　right　use　of　will　and　shall；　and　would　and
should；　and　she　pronounced　the　letter　'r'　with　a　hard　mid…Western　twist。　
Her　voice　was　weak　and　thin；　and　she　could　not　govern　it　from　being　at
times　a　gasp　and　at　times　a　drawl。　　She　did　not　dress　with　the　authority
of　women　who　know　more　of　their　clothes　than　the　people　they　buy　them　of；
she　did　not　carry　herself　like　a　pretty　girl；　she　had　not　the　definite
stamp　of　young…ladyism。　　Yet　she　was　undoubtedly　a　lady　in　every
instinct；　she　wore　with　pensive　grace　the　clothes　which　she　had　not
subjected　to　her　personal　taste；　and　if　she　did　not　carry　herself　like　a
pretty　girl；　she　had　a　beauty　which　touched　and　entreated。

More　and　more　Breckon　found　himself　studying　her　beautyher　soft；　brown
brows；　her　gentle；　dark　eyes；　a　little　sunken；　and　with　the　lids　pinched
by　suffering；　the　cheeks　somewhat　thin；　but　not　colorless；　the　long　chin；
the　clear　forehead；　and　the　massed　brown　hair；　that　seemed　too　heavy　for
the　drooping　neck。　　It　was　not　the　modern　athletic　type；　it　was　rather　of
the　earlier　period；　when　beauty　was　associated　with　the　fragility
despised　by　a　tanned　and　golfing　generation。　　Ellen　Kenton's　wrists　were
thin；　and　her　hands　long　and　narrow。　　As　he　looked　at　her　across　the
racks　during　those　two　days　of　storm；　he　had　sometimes　the　wish　to　take
her　long；　narrow　hands　in　his；　and　beg　her　to　believe　that　he　was
worthier　her　serious　friendship　than　he　had　shown　himself。　　What　he　was
sure　of　at　all　times　now　was　that　he　wished　to　know　the　secret　of　that
patient　pathos　of　hers。　　She　was　not　merely；　or　primarily；　an　invalid。　
Her　family　had　treated　her　as　an　invalid；　but；　except　Lottie；　whose　rigor
might　have　been　meant　sanatively；　they　treated　her　more　with　the
tenderness　people　use　with　a　wounded　spirit；　and　Breckon　fancied　moments
of　something　like　humility　in　her；　when　she　seemed　to　cower　from　his
notice。　　These　were　not　so　imaginable　after　her　family　took　to　their
berths　and　left　her　alone　with　him；　but　the　touching　mystery　remained；　a
sort　of　bewilderment；　as　he　guessed　it；　a　surprise　such　as　a　child　might
show　at　some　incomprehensible　harm。　　It　was　this　grief　which　he　had
refused　not　merely　to　knowhe　still　doubted　his　right　to　know　itbut　to
share；　he　had　denied　not　only　his　curiosity　but　his　sympathy；　and　had
exiled　himself　to　a　region　where；　when　her　family　came　back　with　the　fair
weather；　he　felt　himself　farther　from　her　than　before　their　acquaintance
began。

He　had　made　an　overture　to　its　renewal　in　the　book　he　lent　her；　and　then
Mrs。　Rasmith　and　her　daughter　had　appeared　on　deck；　and　borne　down　upon
him　when　he　was　walking　with　Lottie　Kenton　and　trying　to　begin　his　self…
retrieval　through　her。　　She　had　left　him；　but　they　had　not；　and　in　the
bonds　of　a　prophet　and　his　followers　he　found　himself　bound　with　them　for
much　more　conversation　than　he　had　often　held　with　them　ashore。　　The
parochial　duties　of　an　ethical　teacher　were　not　strenuous；　and　Breckon
had　not　been　made　to　feel　them　so　definitely　before。　　Mrs。　Rasmith　held
that　they　now　included　promising　to　sit　at　her　table　for　the　rest　of　the
voyage；　but　her　daughter　succeeded　in　releasing　him　from　the　obligation；
and　it　was　she　who　smilingly　detached　the　clinging　hold　of　the　elder
lady。　　〃We　mustn't　keep　Mr。　Breckon　from　his　friends；　mother；〃　she　said；
brightly；　and　then　he　said　he　should　like　the　pleasure　of　introducing
them；　and　both　of　the　ladies　declared　that　they　would　be　delighted。

He　bowed　himself　off；　and　half　the　ship's…length　away　he　was　aware；　from
meeting　Lottie　with　her　little　Englishman；　that　it　was　she　and　not　Ellen
whom　he　was　seeking。　　As　the　couple　paused　in　whirring　past　Breckon　long
enough　to　let　Lottie　make　her　hat　fast　against　the　wind；　he　heard　the
Englishman　shout：

〃I　say；　that　sister　of　yours　is　a　fine　girl；　isn't　she？〃

〃She's　a　pretty　goodlooker；〃　Lottie　answered　back。　　〃What's　the　matter
with　HER　sister？〃

〃Oh；　I　say！〃　　her　companion　returned；　in　a　transport　with　her　slangy
pertness；　which　Breckon　could　not　altogether　refuse　to　share。
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　
He　thought　that　he　ought　to　condemn　it；　and　he　did　condemn　Mrs。　Kenton
for　allowing　it　in　one　of　her　daughters；　when　he　came　up　to　her　sitting
beside　another　whom　he　felt　inexpressibly　incapable　of　it。　　Mrs。　Kenton
could　have　answered　his　censure；　if　she　had　known　it；　that　daughters；
like　sons；　were　not　what　their　mothers　but　what　their　environments　made
them；　and　that　the　same　environment　sometimes　made　them　different；　as　he
saw。　　She　could　have　told　him　that　Lottie；　with　her　slangy　pertness；　had
the　truest　and　best　of　the　men　she　knew　at　her　feet；　and　that　Ellen；　with
her　meekness；　had　been　the　prey　of　the　commonest　and　cheapest　spirit　in
her　world；　and　so　left　him　to　make　an　inference　as　creditable　to　his　sex
as　he　could。　　But　this　bold　defence　was　as　far　from　the　poor　lady　as　any
spoken　reproach　was　from　him。　　Her　daughter　had　to　check　in　her　a
mechanical　offer　to　rise；　as　if　to　give　Breckon　her　place；　the　theory　and
practice　of　Tuskingum　being　that　their　elders　ought　to　leave　young　people
alone　together。

〃Don't　go；　momma；〃　Ellen　whispered。　　〃I　don't　want　you　to　go。〃

Breckon；　when　he　arrived　before　them；　remained　talking　on　foot；　and；
unlike　Lottie's　company；　he　talked　to　the　mother。　　This　had　happened
before　from　him；　but　she　had　not　got　used　to　it；　and　now　she　deprecated
in　everything　but　words　his　polite　questions　about　her　sufferings　from
the　rough　weather；　and　his　rejoicing　that　the　worst　was　probably　over。　
She　ventured　the　hope　that　it　was　so；　for　she　said　that　Mr。　Kenton　had
about　decided　to　keep　on　to　Holland；　and　it　seemed　to　her　that　they　had
had　enough　of　storms。　　He　said　he　was　glad　that　they　were　going　right　on；
and　then　she　modestly　recurred　to　the　earlier　opinion　he　had　given　her
husband　that　it　would　be　better　to　spend　the　rest　of　the　summer　in
Holland　than　to　go　to　Italy；　as　if　she　wished　to　conform　herself　in　the
wisdom　of　Mr。　Kenton's　decision。　　He　repeated　his　conviction；　and　he　said
that　if　he　were　in　their　place　he　should　go　to　The　Hague　as　soon　as　they
had　seen　Rotterdam；　and　make　it　their　headquarters　for　the　exploration　of
the　whole　country。

〃You　can't　realize　how　little　it　is；　you　can　get　anywhere　in　an　hour；　the
difficulty　is　to　keep　inside　of　Holland　when　you　leave　any　given　point。　
I　envy　you　going　there。〃

Mrs。　Kenton　inferred　that　he　was　going　to　stop　in　France；　but　if　it　were
part　of　his　closeness　not　to　tell；　it　was　part　of　her　pride　not　to　ask。　
She　relented　when　he　asked　if　he　might　get　a　map　of　his　and　prove　the
littleness　of　Holland　from　it；　and　in　his　absence　she　could　not　well
avoid　saying　to　Ellen；　〃He　seems　very　pleasant。〃

〃Yes；　why　not？〃　　the　girl　asked。

〃I　don't　know。　　Lottie　is　so　against　him。〃

〃He　was　very　kind　when　you　were　all　sick。〃

〃Well；　you　ought　to　know　better　than　Lottie；　you've　seen　him　so　much
more。〃　　Ellen　was　silent；　and　her　mother　advanced　cautiously；　〃I　suppose　
he　is　very　cultivated。〃

〃How　can　I　tell？　　I'm　not。〃

〃Why；　Ellen；　I　think　you　are。　　Very　few　girls　have　read　so　much。〃

〃Yes；　but　he　wouldn't　care　if　I　were　cultivated；　Ha　is　like　all　the　rest。　
He　would　like　to　joke　and　laugh。　　Well；　I　think　that　is　nice；　too；　and　I
wish　I　could　do　it。　　But　I　never　could；　and　now　I　can't　try。　　I　suppose
he　wonders　what　makes　me　such　a　dead　weight　on　you　all。〃

〃You　know　you're　not　that；　Ellen！　　You　musn't　let　yourself　be　morbid。　　It
hurts　me　to　have　you　say　such　things。〃

〃Well；　I　should　like　to　tell　him　why；　and　see　what　he　would　say。〃

〃Ellen！〃

〃Why　not？　　If　he　is　a　minis